A friend of mine last Sunday was mentioning how much they had enjoyed the luncheon which had been held at their church after the service.

"Those church ladies really make a mean egg-salad." She said.

This got me to thinking about church sandwiches in general and how often I have eaten them (not the egg salad ones though).

The occasions I have had to eat church sandwiches have mainly revolved around funerals. You know the kind. The crust has been cut off and they are cut into interesting little designs, usually triangles in my experience; and ya, they are pretty dern tasty!

This got me to thinking about funerals in general. How they go according to the religion of the deceased or the deceased persons family. Doesn't seem to matter if the dead person has been to church in 30+ years, they still get that *family religion funeral*.

The Catholic ones are most interesting with all the incense swinging around the coffin going on and what not. But they do tend to drag out. Which gets you thinking about the luncheon after and those salads and sandwiches.

The Mormon one I attended for a friend was really quite *natural*; people that really *knew* him spoke and they didn't lie, they told the truth about Jimmy. One friend sang and played his guitar- it was one of Jimmy's favorite songs too - not a hymn. It was great and so were the sandwiches.

I've been to Methodist funerals, Baptist funerals, Lutheran funerals and once even a JW funeral. None of them were the same but they all did have 3 things in common that I was to later in life discover. (But, ya, I always knew about those sandwiches).

What 3 things all funeral attenders seem to have in common:

#1 - They go to the luncheon afterwards and eat sandwiches.

#2 - They talk to each other. Not so much about the deceased (but sometimes they do) but about day to day stuff. Chit-chat it's called. Socializing after a funeral is a social *must*.

#3 - People go home and have sex.

The first two seem pretty easy to figure. Hungry, food, eat. At a funeral with other people seating so you talk with them.

The third one was the last I was to discover. But it makes a lot of sense really. People leave the funeral. They go home and they have sex...at least the ones not going home alone (maybe they do too - I don't know).

They do this for two reasons. They are NOT dead and they wish to psychologically verify this.

The other reason is comfort. What better way to be comforted than to be with the one you *love* and validate your LIFE.

...and, if the church ladies can't or don't come through; there is always the funeral menu!  I never knew there Were funeral menus...I do now.  Actually there are a lot of them.

So...if you didn't eat too many sandwiches; go home and have satisfying bonding time with your significant other...and live your life.  :}