What is the old Marsall plan you might ask? After WWII Europe lay in ruins. This can only be expected since they decided to host the last world war. Hosting a world war is messy business. The cleanup from the events is horrendous. With events like Areial Bombardment, Armored Tank Jousting, Ethnic Cleansing, and the ever popular Sreet Fighting. Not unlike hosting the Olympics. The Marshall Plan named after a Secretary of State at that time(1947). Stated that world peace would be better accomplished if we would bolster the European Allies economies. It worked like a charm. We had europe back up and running like a Mexican watch in just 10-15yrs. It was the least we could do. After all we felt just a little responsible for blowing things up. This ended up costing the American taxpayer a measley 13billion dollars. A paltry sum considering the support and admiration we recieved for generations. Yes we gained great supporters like France, Germany, Italy, and Belgium. Where are these allies now? They are busy cashing those checks and doing everything in there power to distance themselves from the U.S. The communities of europe have always treated us like that little red-headed-step-child! No amont of money delivered or support rendered will ever change that. The plan worked like a charm. It kept european immigration down to the bare minimum. It assured Americans everywhere that when visiting a french retaurant in America, french fries would remain on the menu.

So I propose we impliment a new Marshall plan for dealing with the destruction of Islamic nations. The new and improved Marshall Applewhite plan for the resurection of the Islamic economy. The plan has 3 parts really.

Part one> We surrender. Yes you heard me right. Hear me out. By surrendering we will have the sympathy of our own country. Our own country can than rush in to render aid to us. We will also pick up some much needed assistance from other nations. Who in turn will make the nations of Islam feel a little guilty for causing so much pain, suffering, and destruction here. They are then forced to garner aid to our destroyed economy. Perhaps in the form of free oil! We in turn are allowed to export our surplus in the form of cyanide laced grape Kool-Aid. It should be a big hit over there as they seem to have such a penchant for suicide. We can accept Osama Bin Laden as their ambassador to the U.S. so we know where the little bastard is at all times. We in turn could give them our version and send Charles Manson to be our ambassador in their country. Cleaning out our prisons is paramount to this plan. Crime drops and the burden of expense is shifted off the American taxpayer. Learned that from old Fidel! We render no aid to the nations of Islam. Based on the grounds we destroyed nothing as their countries were shit-holes to begin with! We then take a cue from our euopean allies. We snub every little thing they do. This will gain the admiration of the Euro-Trash elite. Viola a new red-headed-step-child is born in the form of islamic nations. Every time our new Islamic allies ask for aid with their problems. We send old Charlie Manson over to ask if they need more Kool-Aid and when we might expect their overdue check to bolster our economy?

Part Two> We abandon our christian belief system. Let's face it economically helping every one in need is just too costly. We then proceed to violently force our belief system on them. They already cornered the market on the word infidel so we will just call them nonconformists. Our new religion will promote peace and harmony outwardly. However it will reserve the right to kill all nonconformists privately. The new religion I strongly propose is the Heavens Gate Cult. The crazier the better I say. We erect our new temples shaped like UFO's all over their country. We give all new converts a pair of nike shoes, $5.75, a square purple shroud, 30 barbituates, a glass of Vodka, and a ride in a space ship. It should be fairly easy to convert the masses as they currently believe they can get a pascel of virgins upon their death. Just what in God's green earth can someone do with all those virgins? If you want me to voluntarily check out. Offer me something I could look forward to like 25 sluts. Thats worth dieing for. Once we've put the last of those silly bastards on the spaceship. We can all go back to our former religions.

Part Three> We become the dominant world power again. Our economy is fixed. World peace is achieved. Our crime is at an all time low. We can now feel comfortable electing any half-wit politician to be president. We resume our rightful place as red-headed-step-child of the world. We seal off our borders which now include the middle east and all the oil. We throw up some all-inclusive resorts on the beaches. Lots of people like to visit places like that. Look at Mexico or Jamaica. We tear down the Statue Of Liberty and resurrect a huge middle finger statue pointed at europe. We now own most of the worlds oil and avaiable beachfront property. Europe and the rest of the world will have to pretend to like us. Just so they can get oil and/or beachfront condos. We have lived up to our neighbors expectations of being those crazy Americans. Life goes on uninterrupted.

Seems like a good plan to me. If you agree please feel free to leave a comment below. Or visit my blogs at http://www.hootnhowell.blogsot.com/ If you do not agree. Then may I offer you a condolense prize of a ride in a spaceship.