After spending over half of my life raising four daughters, I think it is fair to say that I have encountered a multitude of growing pains. Theirs and mine. From what to wear the first day of school to how to apply makeup to the heartbreaks of young crushes. I had made up my mind when my oldest was just tiny, that I would be certain that I stayed open to her thoughts and concerns, no matter how small they might seem to be to me. I knew that if they concerned her, they were really big to her. I kept that in mind throughout all of their lives, and I am so glad that I did. I managed to keep them from trying the sneaky things that teenagers do. My door and heart stayed open for them 24-7. I was told things that I didn't like to hear, but I knew it was truth, and they came to me instead of someone else. I couldn't over-react, that would have closed doors and they would have turned elsewhere for advice and support.

Before I knew it, I had kids from school, their friends, asking me what to do about their troubles with their parents, boyfriends, girlfriends, teachers, you name it, I was asked about it. I never had an empty house on the weekends, or an empty yard. All of their friends came to our home to just hang out, and their parents were glad they were safe. Yes, there were always rules that had to be followed and they always were. I can't say that my daughters never pushed the envelope from time to time, because they did. They were all disciplined with lots of love and support.

I believe that this is the reason that they all still talk to me about everything, and they are supportive of me and my decisions. I talked to them very openly about drugs in language they heard at school, we discussed drinking, relationships, intimacy and how to treat people. If they had a question about anything, and I didn't know the answer, I found out the answer for them. They came to depend on that. They grew up to be responsible adults that don't pass judgement on anyone, and accept people for who they are. We all have a great time together, spend a lot of time with each other while still giving each other our own personal space.

There were and still are times that we not only laugh together, but we cry together over things that have happened, and understand why certain choices were made. We talk about things, and now I find out how they feel about things that have happened in their lives within the past 10 years. No bitterness, no animosity, no anger. Just understanding and love, and lots of that. My oldest is 26, followed by 23, 20 and the baby is 19. They are wonderful children, but more importantly, they are wonderful people.