Have you seen my beautiful tits?
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I truly have a beautiful pair of tits, and I think now you have seen them you will definitely agree with me. They may be small by some people's standards, but what they lack in size they make up for with their enthusiasm for fun.
My tits are occasionally mistaken for Blue Tits, but as you can see, even on this cold Winter's day they are definitely Great Tits and not at all cold.
Most of my friends have seen my tits now, and even though they often need binoculars to get a good view of them, they never seem to mind too much and will spend many hours watching them without getting bored. Some of my friends even asked if they could hold my tits, but I explained my tits are not comfortable being handled, and the only people able to handle them are my Husband and me. My friends were very disappointed, but I offered to let them film or photograph my tits instead, which took many hours, but they were very happy with the results especially when they got pictures of my tits enjoying my Husband's nuts.
One of my Great Tits on my Husband's nuts.
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Yesterday I caught my neighbour tampering with my Husband's nuts. I got very upset with her and told her that she should get some of her own. My Husband said he didn't mind though, as she had offered him full use of her box for breeding purposes, and had even installed a camera to record all their activities. Under the circumstances I let it go, and told her that as long as I could watch too she could share my Husband's nuts whenever she needed to just so long as she didn't disturb my tits or try to hold them. She agreed, and we are now all avidly watching my neighbour's box on camera in case it gets damp before next spring.
My Husband reckons one of my tits is bigger than the other, but I am sure he is wrong and it's just the angle he sees them from. I did suggest we measure them, but they won't stay still long enough for this to be possible. I suppose we could try weighing them instead, but due to their flighty nature this could also make things hard, especially for my Husband who would be responsible for pinning them down. If all else fails we have decided to call in a specialist who really knows his tits, and can examine them in great detail to see if either is larger than the other. My Husband says he knows just the man to do this, apparently this guy is an expert on tits and birds in general, and he frequently tells tales about his enormous cock and how it frequently shows lots of activity, especially first thing in the mornings. My Husband says he wants a cock like his friend's too, but I told him I simply haven't got the room for such a big one, and my tits might suffer as a result of the intrusion.
My Neighbour's Tit and Box.
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My tits are always happiest when they are out in the open and not confined. Sometimes my Husband even gets to stroke them, although they quickly return to snuggling up together.
One of my Husband's work colleagues invited him to her house to ask for his opinion about her tits, and he gave her such good compliments that even her Husband said that my Husband was always welcome to get on her tits, and asked him if he could come again soon. Of course my Husband said he had fantastic tits at home and that her tits could not compare to mine, but he did offer to come as often as she required even though it may be quite hard on occasion. Both of them willingly agreed and even asked if I would like to come too, but I declined as I am busy enough with my own tits most of the time.
Our local paper have asked if they can feature my tits, and we have said this would be a good idea, especially as this means so many more people will get to see them. They are sending round a photographer tomorrow and apparently if he gets the right picture it could feature as 'Bird of the Month'. It is all so exciting that I can barely contain myself, even though I am sitting here stroking my pussy, (who is also very excited).
My Husband wants to put lots of pictures of my tits on the Internet too, and I think this is a fabulous idea, especially if am able to advise them on how to handle tits and what kinds of nuts they prefer.
I hope you will look out for my tits in the near future, and will be as impressed with them as most other people seem to be.
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Comments
Cheers Candace, pleased it made you smile :)
I would never have guessed TMG, do you have any of your own that you like to observe or interact with?
I always prescribed to the philosopy of letting the bird fly away so to speak and if it returns. That, said I lay no claims to possesion of any birds but I do like to watch them all.
TMG
Love this hub.
TMG, it is good to let your birds roam free, as they will no doubt return on this basis, especially if you are willing to offer them your nuts. You will never be able to possess any bird, you are correct, but if treated well your birds will prefer to stay around you.
Moonlake, thankyou, I am so glad you enjoyed this hub. :)
I must have good nuts as my life has been filled with an abundance of birds. Some staying around longer than others.
TMG
I heard your nuts were larger than most, which could explain why you attract so many birds. The ones who leave may be planning on nesting, which may not be ideal for you, but so long as you look after the birds that stay around you I doubt you will have many problems. Please remember to give their box special attention regularly and you won't go far wrong.
Thanks Misha, my pussy will always be pleased to see you, and of course my tits will be very grateful that you find them so appealing. Please feel free to photograph them whenever you want to :)
I definitely will take my camera with me next time I visit Guernsey :)
I can't wait, and I am sure my tits will be thrilled at the idea of being photographed.
Well tits and pussy could be a good combination if they are handled right AG. You would need to keep a close eye on them and pay each of them plenty of attention, but I am sure you wouldn't find that a problem.
very clever! thanks!
very clever! thanks!
Thanks Mike, glad you appreciated my beautiful tits :)
You're warped! I'm sending this to my uncle so he can share it with his Audubon Society friends! ;)
LOL, I hope he enjoys it Suzanne :)
Ha! I wasn't fooled this time! But that doesn't mean I didn't have fun either! I wonder what's next! Hmm.... :D
You forgot about nuts to eat and balls to play with BT. Some nice sticks and rods won't hurt either :D
I'm laughing at all these awesome hubs you're putting up! Keep up the good work!
LOL, great comments from everyone, far too many to address individually so I will just say thanks for all having such fabulous sense of humours. :)
Misty, Misty, Misty,,,,sigh. Is there no end?
Too funny, I can't begin to imagine what's next :)
Hey Trish, thanks for stopping by. I am running out of ideas now, but will see if I can come up with anything else. :)
OMG, Misty you are hilarious!
Thanks everyone, please feel free to come and look at my tits any time you want to. (as weblog says, at least I got Google Ads on this hub :) )
Hi marisue, Perhaps I should run a poll on this. You send me a picture of your tits, I shall upload it on to here, and then put up a poll for people to vote on who they think has the nicest tits :)
So Misty the fact you didn't get google ads on your "pussy" hub must make that title the naughtiest headline of the tongue-in-cheek naughty hubs... good one - cheers.
I guess you must be right Ajcor, oh well, never mind :)
My wife's ass didn't have any ads on it, either! I noted it in my tags.
I guess your wife's ass may have looked rather strange with adverts on it BT. :)
Tits or Ass, what a dilemma for most men to choose between :)
Jolly good, I shall look forward to admiring your tits and inspecting them closely. :)
Hi Rodney, thanks for admiring my tits. Yes they are usually in pairs and it would kind of look wrong to only see one tit I guess.
As I accessed your Hub and saw the first picture, I burst out laughing.
very nice
Thanks Patty, that is exactly the reaction I was hoping for :)
Thanks Lgali, glad you enjoyed it. :)
Misty, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, Happy birthday dear Cindy, happy birthday to you! Sorry if my singing voice is bad, but I tried!
Great Hub Misty, I loved it! Very clever.
Thanks Gwendy, and happy birthday to you too :)
Thanks TMG, I love to show off my tits to anyone who has time to admire them fully :)
Hi Patricia, ooohhh, very good re 'having some Larks'. Thanks for dropping in :)
haha! funny - i was actually thinking this was about something else - but i do like the birds
Hi webismine, yes I am very proud of them and now you can see why :) Thanks for commenting.
Hi VJ, my honeytrap worked to lure you in here then LOL. Glad you liked the birds :)
luv it!
Thanks alkalinelife421, glad you enjoyed the hub :)
A very cool way to grab attention of the readers. Keep it up misty!
Thanks Paulie, nice to see you here and thanks for commenting.
Hi JJC13. I always do my best to 'keep it up' and I am told I am quite successful by my Husband :) :) :)
I believe that they don't have great tits in North America. No wonder the US guys are facinated. By the way, keep your husbands nuts dry. I find they can turn rotten in the UK winter - too much damp.
By the way, I thought people who lived in Guernsey were dull - how wrong I was. Well Done!
Thanks Bruce, rockinjoe has great tips for getting a good handjob. My Husband was really impressed by the results after reading Joe's hub :)
Hi Rik, I definitely prefer my Husband's nuts dry, and so do my tits. LOL, believe me, in Guernsey we are anything but dull, although bear in mind this is Guernsey in the English Channel, and not Guernsey in the USA (no idea what the American Guernsey is like) :) :) :)
Thanks Nicole, pleased it gave you a good chuckle :)
This is Hilarious hehe!
now who couldn't resist reading a hub with such a great tag line - great read to get the day started right. Thanks
Thanks Jery, Multimastery and Livelovecoffee. I am so delighted that this hub gave you all a good laugh and you are impressed by my beautiful pair of tits :)
i did laugh with that, very nice.
LOL.
I bet a lot of guys clicked on this one :)
Hmmm....I'm thinking that you, me and BT write a hub together and call it. My First HubPages 3 Some. We'd get CRAZY hits.
Thanks to Waynet, Richelle and Karen. Pleased and contented to make you laugh, (I bet loads of guys clicked on this one too LOL) :)
Hi Joe, what a great idea, have a word with B.T. I am up for it if he is too :)
HI,I definitely will take my camera with me next time I visit Guernsey.
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To funny !!!:) Interesting and sublimal the bird is beautiful and what a name..:)
Thanks AEvans, glad you liked it, and yes, that is really the birds name, a 'Tit'.
Oh, but you are evil.<grin> The innuendo was more noticealble than the content, and achieved (by the number of responses) the desired results.
Clever thinking, to be sure.
Thanks jazzbychas, I just love an innuendo sense of humour, even though I know I am pretty warped :) :) :)
Misty, just as a quick observation, your tits definatly appears to generate more comments or so it seems than that your need for a man to trim your bush. Therefore one must assume that there are more observers, than hubbers who are prepared to to tackle the more physical side od things. Or is it just my imagination!
LOL Rodney, I think you could be right, there are a lot of voyeurs out there who prefer the 'look but don't touch' idea. Either that or my overgrown bush was simply too much of a challenge to them :)
Funny and clever!
Thanks Tourmaline, glad you enjoyed it :)
hahahahahaha... this hub is truly funny. If you don't have enough second thought you will find this blog devastating! But for me it's really cool!!! you have a great hub here!
Thanks Shezz Pleased it made you chuckle :)
ROTFL! You are tooooo funny!
Thanks JamaGenee, that is a great compliment :)
Thanks Topstuff, nice to let someone else enjoy them too :)
Hi Laurie, thanks so much, it is great to receive such an enthusiastic response to a hub of mine :) Hope your Husband loves my Tits too :) :) :)
Blushes, awww shucks, thanks Neil I am flattered :)
very amusing
Thanks leksi, pleased it gave you a giggle :)
Candace Morgan says:
12 months ago
Very funny. Thanks.