How to Check the Emotional Health of Your Family?

If you have a family, then you have 'health' as a whole, that must be considered as a one.

The family, is the basic unit of our society. Therefore, our communities are only as healthy as our families. Makes sense, doesn't it?

Lets look at the family, as a body... of individuals. In healthy families - we seek for unity. Each individual member of a family, has the need to be accepted not by, but as part of the whole body.

Simply put, if all members of a healthy family; feel needed, feel loved and they also, feel safe - then I would say that you are doing a great job at keeping healthy; and could consider yourself to have a family that is in good general health.

Whether your family is two or three - or more; it begins when two individuals are aware that 'they' are a family. It means that you are looking out for the well-being - of more than the self.

Family - I am not here to define a family, or families and what constitutes a family. That is for you to determine for your family. My only suggestion will be, that once your family is defined... and you must define your family - that you recognize that the family, has health that must be given a check-up regularly.

Lets focus on three areas of a healthy family and discuss briefly, what these three systems of the family or the body are; and why it is critical that they are functioning properly - in order to maintain healthy families in general.

Healthy families, have a ‘climate’ versus a temperature that can be read or arbitrarily checked - by a list of do’s and don’ts. We do not read a climate, but we observe it and feel it and experience it. The entire body of a healthy family - should feel this climate, because they ARE the climate.

Although I will not suggest a specific list, or criteria for any of these things for your particular family; we will identify three areas that you can focus on and observe with better awareness for overall good family health.

• FEEL PART OF THE FAMILY
• FEEL NEEDED BY THE FAMILY
• FEEL SAFE WITHIN THE FAMILY

Have you ever heard the silly cliche, “two’s company, three is a crowd”. The individual who coined that phrase... which has become a way of basically saying... “you are not welcome” - obviously, was a selfish person. In reality, the only person that an individual of this mindset, could possibly be thinking of -- is well -- the self.

Think about it? Do you call anyone in your family - ‘company’? No. Company comes and goes... but family is HOME. We normally think of having ‘company’ - as entertaining. Interesting, isn’t it - if now we apply this concept and understanding of ‘company’ - again to the phrase...

When checking the health of your family -- you could look for this symptom in your body. Is your body showing any signs of ‘disconnect’ from the whole?

This is simple diagnostics, that you can apply - to know if your body, as one - is a family, or a member of the body is feeling a-part from the whole.

When the whole body, has a down system in this manner -- then the health of the entire body, or family, will suffer from poor health.

Each individual, who is part of your family - must feel part of the whole, personally, in order for you to remain a healthy family.

• We feel LOVE, when we are part of a healthy family.

How about another cliche' - "One Bad Apple Can Spoil The Pie".

Not just a slice mind you, but the entire pie. Interesting observation in this cliche', is that until you slice and partake of the 'pie', it is not discernible that the pie is spoiled. I hate that!

A thing looks good! You want it! Your mouth is even beginning to water at this point. You go to the trouble to carefully slice a single piece - place it on a well chosen plate; and might even take the time to heat it up if need be; oh - and don't forget the ala mode... french vanilla.

You find your favorite spot to indulge and make yourself comfortable, so that you might revel in every bite.... ready? You lift your fork and delve into that mouthwatering desert; and YUCK!

You spend the next five minutes in recovery -- getting over the bad taste of it, the disappointment of it... and now you must recover from having such trust broken.

You, were tricked... right? Deceived!

You, will NEVER look at mom's homemade apple pie the same. I believe that we call this 'becoming' disillusioned.

Yes... over apple pie.

Because our families health, is THAT important, the individual - must be attended to regularly and gently - in order to yield a good crop.

Family, should and must, be the safest 'place' - that is known to each member of the family . As my own children were growing up, I made certain that they knew - people would come and people will go throughout the course of their lives. But - no matter what happens in life - that their family would always be there, and right by their side.

Therefore, treat family members with the utmost regard, because this relationship that is developed in a healthy family - is critical to the emotional, spiritual and physical well-being of each individual in the family.

Every person, within our family has the 'right' to know that within their family, is safety from all things that would hurt them - be it physically or emotionally - because these systems are so very critical to their ability to have good spiritual health and well-being -- throughout the entire rest of their lives.

Building trust in your family, is most likely the single most powerful system in the 'body' that IS the healthy family. A healthy family understands that it is their job, to protect and defend - their family.

Individuals need to know that 'family' will take care of their emotional and physical needs, at all times.

• We FEEL LOVED in our family, when we know we are in a SAFE environment.

Who can measure the power of the healthy family? As we observe the world around us, imagine, IF - each and every member of society - had the blessing of being a part of such a family, somewhere in their lives?

It seems a simple thing, that 'Individuals' can provide conscientiously for their families; those that they have become comitted to; these few basic requirements for good health within A family.

1. A PLACE
2. TO BE NEEDED
3. AND SECURE

When these three 'needs' are met, in each individual member of our family... it is assurance that we are a healthy family.

We cannot expect, that because we are 'called' a family, that these needs are met. A healthy family, will be engaged as a whole, in seeing that each system and individual is well cared for and receives regular check-ups, to insure good health.

When love is present within a family - members will learn to trust that they are bound to a healthy family, which will strengthen them as they go out and away from the 'heart', which - no matter where they go, that source, from whence they sprang... will be a continual source of life.

We can all dream...

Write-On!