Michael Jackson was the most FAMOUS entertainer in the world. This is a fact that cannot be disputed.

Certain members of my family (mainly all 6 of my sisters) probably have every record ever recorded by Michael Jackson. From the time he was with the Jackson 5 until the last album he recorded, I bet my sisters have them all.

When I was growing up Michael Jackson was my sisters’ favorite entertainer. The two-bed room house that me, my two brothers and my six sisters shared with our parents was literally covered with Michael Jackson or Jackson 5 posters.

My sisters constantly talked about his big Afro, his smile and how cute he was. They were in love with him. He was all they listened to, almost all the time. You may have occasionally heard some James Brown, Aretha Franklin or Stevie Wonder blaring from the little portable radio that was always on in my sisters’ room but those performers were mere “opening acts” for the headliner--Michael Jackson. Growing up I listened to a lot of Michael Jackson, I really had no choice.

By the time I graduated from high school, I didn’t really listen to Michael Jackson that much. My friends and I listened to groups like; Parlament-Funkadelic, Bootsy’s Rubberband, The Isley Brother’s, Earth Wind and Fire, Confunkshun and The Barkays.
We were into girls and basketball and other stuff. We didn’t watch much TV back then and cable TV was fairly new to us. We had heard about this new cable TV show called Music Television or MTV that played “music videos” but we hardly ever watched it.
You see, back then MTV wasn’t playing the type of music we liked. The fact was (as hard as it is to believe now) MTV “refused” to play ANY black artists. So it was a big deal when they finally started playing BEAT IT and BILLIE JEAN videos by Michael Jackson. After watching those videos over and over, my friends and I were hooked on Michael Jackson.

It was Michael Jackson that influenced many of my friends and I to get “Jheri Curls” and start “Break Dancing.” Me and my friends went from stealing hubcaps and hood ornaments off of expensive cars and selling them to make a little money to beat boxing and break dancing on flattened-out cardboard boxes on street corners. We made a little more money dancing so we kinda owe Michael for that.

As time went on, we started not listening to Michael as much. Not that he didn’t make good music, because he did, it was just that many of us found it harder and harder to identify with and him.

Later, when I went to college and started studying about history and myself and the struggles that my people had gone (and were still going) through, the more I saw Michael Jackson, the madder I would become. It got to the point where I was embarrassed of him. I couldn’t understand why he was doing some of the things that he was doing.

Why was he continually lightening his skin? Why, after the first time, was he getting his nose and face altered? Each time getting his nose a little straighter and narrower until his entire face started to look like a caricature of what I think his ultimate goal was--to look WHITE.

So…for a while…I really didn't like Michael Jackson. Not because he wanted to look White but because it was pretty obvious that he "hated" looking BLACK. I couldn’t understand this.

Eventually, the more I educated myself the more my feelings toward him started to soften. I started understanding what was going on with him. The psychology classes that I was taking did a good job of explaining “body dysmorphic disorder” or BDD and the self-hatred that he obviously had.

The history classes I took helped me understand why some African Americans might have a problem finding beauty in themselves in a culture that constantly told them that they were anything but beautiful. Remember, Michael Jackson was born in 1958; attitudes about beauty as it pertained to African Americans in this country were much different back then.

Still, my problem with Michael Jackson wasn’t exclusively the fact that he hated being black, although that certainly was a large part of it. It was that he hated it so much. His self-hatred was so strong that he chose to give up everything GOD had given him. Not for the MONEY, he had more than enough money after his THRILLER album, no; Michael Jackson gave up everything—his entire BEING--for FAME!

Michael Jackson already had more fame than many entertainers will ever see in their lifetimes! This wasn’t enough for him; he wanted to be the “MOST FAMOUS “entertainer in the world! Yet, he didn’t think he could attain this type of fame while looking the way that GOD had made him. He had convinced himself that the only way that he could attain the status of “MOST FAMOUS” entertainer in the world was to look, no, become—WHITE!

What could have possibly happened to him in those early years of his life that would cause this gifted young man to so despise himself? Could it have been a crazy, money-hungry father? Could it have been a racist society that convinced a perfectly healthy and handsome young man that his natural features were so grotesque that he forever considered himself “ugly?” Who knows what caused Michael to think the way he did. We only know the outcome of his thoughts.

It was as though, he looked GOD right in the face and told GOD “I am not satisfied with what you have created.” It was as though he said to GOD “ even though you have made me unique and you have given me incredible talent and you have made me the most celebrated African American entertainer EVER…it is not enough.” And GOD, being the merciful creator that he is, gave Michael, as he did with us all—a choice.

Michael Jackson made his choice.

Michael Jackson chose to sell his SOUL for FAME!
We can’t blame it on his Father.We can’t blame it on RACISM. It has to be blamed on CHOICE. Michael Jackson made his choice.

In questioning and probably shunning GOD, it was as though Michael had made some cruel deal with the devil himself. Only like usually, the devil didn’t quite keep his end of the bargain. So Michael got his fame but that's all he got.

It seemed that the more famous Michael Jackson got, the WHITER he became? He relinquished his GOD-given carmel colored skin, his GOD-given kinky afro, his GOD-given thick lips and wide nose, every thing that gave him “SOUL,” he gladly gave up for “FAME!”

The fame Michael was seeking was the type of fame that he enjoyed as a cute talented African American kid while he was a member of the Jackson 5. He longed for that type of fame--only more of it!

Michael was seeking the type of fame that he received from the entire world as a young African American man who had broken barriers with his “OFF the WALL” album and had set the world on fire with THRILLER. He yearned for that type of fame—only more of it!

He should have been happy. He should have moonwalked off into the history books as the greatest most adored African American entertainer ever! But he couldn’t because that’s not the kind of FAME that he was looking for. Michael Jackson thought he wanted the type of fame enjoyed by THE BEATLES or ELVIS even though, in every measurable way, he had already achieved more fame than both.

Michael Jackson wanted the kind of fame that “he thought” only a WHITE person could attain. So…he sold his SOUL and he got the type of fame that “he thought “ he deserved! Yet, the devil was in the details—literally. So when Michael Jackson became the MOST FAMOUS entertainer in the world--he couldn’t “enjoy” one minute of it!

Almost from the minute he sold his final African feature to the plastic surgeons he was no longer admired for his GOD-given voice and dancing ability. Probably the day after his total transformation until the day of his death, he was the laughing stock of the entire world!

WACKO-JACKO was what every major newspaper in the world called him. Child molestation is what they accused him of. Bankruptcy and strange behavior is what they printed about him. The very thing that he thought would give him the greatest acceptance—his transformation from African American male to European looking male / female…was the one thing that he was ridiculed for the most.

My GOD man, what have you done? Was the question most asked by everyone!

By his own admission, he was a lonely, sad, sad man!

Long ago, Michael Jackson made a choice. Unsatisfied with what most people would consider heaven on earth, Michael had to have more. He dared to tell GOD that what he had made wasn’t good enough. He bit the forbidden fruit and was banished from what surely, for him and many entertainers, would have been the celebrity equivalent of “the Garden of Eden.

Michael Jackson sold his SOUL for FAME and all he got for it was—a living HELL!

Michael Jackson died on Thursday June 25th 2009 yet, due to a choice “he” made long ago, even in death, he is still the most FAMOUS entertainer in the world!

GOD have mercy on his soul!