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This is my first sojourn into the tender underbelly of Hubpages - The Idea Bank. While I saw lots of interesting things to write about, I don't know a lot about burning DVDs or doing my taxes, as I have someone do that for me.

The topic 'How To Feel Sexy' caught my eye. I started asking myself "Do I feel sexy?" I think so. "What do you do that makes you feel sexy?" Or is it just a feeling that you have, and you have no idea where it comes from? And could I write about it in the position of Subject Matter Expert?

I guess the first place to start would be to begin with the definiton of sexy.

According to wiktionary.org, sexy means "Having sexual appeal; suggestive of sex; Very attractive or appealing". I think for the purposes of this hub, I will addess the last one: "Very attractive or appealing".

Different Strokes for Different Folks

If you ask people on the street to describe traits that make a person sexy, you will get a lot of different answers. Here are some things people think make a person sexy:

• She is blonde
• He is tall
• She is brunette
• He is short
• She is a redhead
• He is bald like Bruce Willis
• She is slender like Victoria Beckham
• He has long hair
• She has long hair
• He looks like Johnny Depp
• She looks like Tyra Banks
• He is rich
• She is smart
• He is poor and therefore, Bohemian
• She is curvy like Kimberly Locke
• He is educated
• She is educated
• He is funny
• She is funny
• He has nice eyes
• She has nice "seins"
• He is sensitive
• She likes sports
• He drives a fast car
• She drives a Moped

...and the list goes on.

But is it really only body type, hair color, sense of humor, a fast car, etc. that makes someone sexy? Well, yes and no. It is true that some things like money, beauty and luxury cars can enhance our sex appeal, but many people without all of those things still feel sexy, and because of that, ARE sexy. So where does that come from - Feeling sexy?

One word: CONFIDENCE

From a woman's perspective, a man can be physically gorgeous, or have a lot of money, or drive a Corvette, even (a car I find DEAD SEXY), but if he lacks confidence, he's just not all that sexy to me.

So where do people get confidence from? Is it in a bottle of expensive perfume or cologne? Perhaps. I know when I put tiny spritzes of Princess by Vera Wang on my personage in strategic spots, I feel a little sexier.

And that is the secret - Many small elements, internal and external, that all combine to make you feel sexy.

Your sX Factor

For the purposes of this hub, let's call a person's sex appeal their sX Factor. I do confess that on days when my hair falls just right, my eyes are bright, my makeup is perfect, my hair is all shiny and my outfit looks just right, I start to feel pretty good about myself and I feel that I have a high sX factor.

Does your sX Factor Come from Outside?

I have heard people say that a person's sexiness comes from within - A personal satisfaction and comfort with your own self to begin with. I also believe this is true. But I also think that you can't help but increase your feelings of sex appeal when an attractive member of the opposite sex gives you the eye. That can boost anyone's ego. But even if you go somewhere and someone doesn't give you the eye, does this mean you have no sex appeal? Of course not. Everybody is off doing their own thing, caught up in things you know nothing about, so if they don't notice you that day, it just means they are busy thinking about asking their boss for a raise, or how annoyed they were that morning when their cat pooed in their shoe.

What Can I Do To Feel More Sexy?

The most important component to feeling sexy is feeling happy with yourself.

I know...Everyone says that. That's because it's true.

And it is doable.

How, you ask?

The first, most important step is to believe in yourself.

You don't have to be supermodel skinny, 22 years old or have a perfect body. You don't have to starve yourself either - But you do have to make a conscious effort every day to eat healthfully. This doesn't mean eating rabbit food in microscopic portions - It just means eating reasonably well, and being a little active. Maybe you can't be active because of some physical limitation - But there are always some activities you can do that you find enjoyable that will get you off of the sofa and into something that you will enjoy and that will boost your confidence.

The trick is to find something you are good at. Everyone is good at something. It doesn't matter what it is: building things, painting, cooking, gardening, dancing, writing, computers, playing an instrument - even things like being a whiz at cards or billiards or Trivial Pursuit, or building model airplanes - they all count as worthwhile pursuits if you enjoy them. Maybe you like helping animals or children (your own or someone else's). All things are good endeavours if you feel good doing them.

And doing things that make you feel accomplished or give you a sense of personal satisfaction all add up with the superficial things like nice cologne and the right tie and a nice pair of shoes to make you feel sexy.

My Feel Sexy in 30 Days Plan

One - The first thing you should do to feel sexy is to throw away any beauty or fashion magazines like Cosmopolitan or GQ. You will never look like America's Next Top Model or a Calvin Klein model. Guess what? Neither will they. Those pictures are Photoshopped within an inch of their lives. And do you need to look like that to feel sexy anyway? No, as we have already learned.

Two - Become conscious of what you are eating and drinking. "Well, DUH" you might be saying to yourself. But when you start to look at foods and drinks from the inside-out (all of their ingredients), you start to think how that might not be so good for your body or your overall well-being. You don't have to count calories. Just READ the nutrition label so you know what you are eating, then take one serving size and leave the rest. If you do this for a while, it will just naturally become part of your routine.

Three - If you don't need to lose weight, maybe there is something else about yourself that is bugging you that you want to change. Again, it only needs changing if it is bothering you. If you feel unsexy because your hair is getting grey, color it! If you are fine with it grey, leave it alone.

Four - Become physically active. This can be whatever you want it to be:

• walk (with a friend or by yourself)
• bicycle
• join a gym
• work out at home
• work in the garden
• walk your dog
• play with your children
• knock some golf balls around at the local driving range
• go bowling
• play interactive video games like Wii Sport
• play two-square, hopscotch or other childhood games with your spouse or lover
• get a cheap MP3 player and rock out to sexy music
• herd cats (although I wouldn't advise it:)

Five - Do something you've never done before, once a week. Or, do one thing every day that scares you. I got this advice from a favorite song:

Baz Luhrmann - Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)

Six - Smile and laugh often. Even when you don't feel like it. I have gone places when I have been in a grumpy mood and I can feel someone looking at me. I'm all set to give them the old "WTF are you looking at?" look, and they smile at me so pleasantly that I can't help but smile back, sometimes even striking up a conversation and then we both go away happy and laughing, even. Sometimes you have to force the issue, so when you get home, pop in a funny DVD like The Simpsons or anything that makes you laugh (e.g. The Three Stooges, Monty Python, etc.) and laugh yourself silly. Being in a postive, happy frame of mind makes you feel good and boosts your confidence!

Seven - Finally, if there's an item you have always wanted but never got yourself because you thought it was too self-indulgent, go for it. Obviously we can't afford to go out and buy a Ferrari, but there are things we just don't buy ourselves because we are always putting others' needs before our own. That's noble, but it can make you feel like you are in a rut, which is very UNsexy. Sometimes you have to decide to go get that one thing that you always wanted...maybe it's a sparkly dress. There's something about a sparkly dress that makes any woman feel sexy. If you can't afford a sparkly dress, go to the drug store and buy some sparkly hair jewels and wear them, subtly threaded in your hair here and there. These things are not just for teens! If you're a man, maybe it's time to go get that really nice pair of shades, that black leather jacket or that cool James Bond sort of watch you always wanted. Indulging yourself once in a while, especially that neglected inner playboy or playgirl, can go a long way towards increasing your sX Factor.

So, there you have it - Seven steps towards feeling sexy. Try them today!

You'll be glad you did.

◊This article was written by cosette and published at hubpages.com. If you are not reading this article at hubpages.com, it is a stolen article.◊