"An eminent man who raises funds for a large college told me that of every hundred people who give gifts to the college, ninety-four want their names mentioned. The other six are satisfied to have their good deeds remain anonymous. He told me that by bestowing more praise on these ninety-four donors, the college receives more generous gifts from them."

Use this proven principle in your own life. Everyone is proud when they do something that shows good character. They usually want and should receive recognition. To them, recognition is like a monument.

When you own the valuable complimentary words in this chapter, you will be able to bestow these monuments of praise whenever the opportunity presents itself. You will be giving happiness and gaining the good will that will build your popularity and success. Besides, you will receive the esteem that people instinctively feel for those with an excellent vocabulary.

How to make compliments convincing?

Now, how do you put across your compliments convincingly?

It is an art to make your praises convincing. It is not as difficult an art as telling jokes well or selling successfully, but you do need an understanding of principles plus practice.

First, your compliment must "tie in" to the conversation as casually as possible. Otherwise, the recipient may either doubt your sincerity or be overly embarrassed.

Second, is a rule that can be summed up in two words: Don't oversell! A good salesman knows when to stop selling. If he oversells, his prospect begins to doubt everything that he has said. So make your compliments reasonably short and when you have made your point, stop complimenting!

Third, compliment in a warm, natural voice. Don't register the false enthusiasm of an amateur actor. Don't gush. Show your sincerity by being as natural and confident as possible. Of course, many people are somewhat embarrassed and awkward when paying a compliment. This can be overcome by effort and practice. But an awkward compliment is far more convincing than one of gushing or thundering enthusiasm.

Put sparkle in your compliments about appearance and personality

How long is it since you have complimented someone about his appearance or personality? Did you use words that sparkled with individuality and warmth? This chapter will equip you with some of the most useful words for praising appearance or personality.

I asked twenty-five women and twenty-five men what compliments they had received about their appearance or personality that they still remembered. Their answers included the complimentary words in this chapter and other words of similar individuality. No one recalled such trite phrases as nice or swell. But several remembered explicit compliments that they had received many years ago.

For example, a middle-aged woman proudly recalled that a high school boy friend had called her ravishing. Another remembered that years ago an office manager had said that she was winsome. A man told me that he still recalls how he glowed with pride on one of his first jobs when someone in the office told him he was debonair.

Naturally, you can't expect your compliments about appearance and personality to be treasured and remembered for a lifetime. But if their explicitness and warmth contribute, even in a small way, to giving people more confidence, you have helped them. And you have gained the good will, the pleasant human relations that build popularity and success.

To make it as easy as possible for you to master not just read about the "Words that Win Success and Popularity", we have used the most successful teaching methods of the colleges, high schools, and adult education schools that teach vocabulary building. Each chapter includes several word games, plus a discussion of the words. These games are fun, and they carry out the prime discovery of modern education: that you learn best by doing.

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