Got some nice patent leather shoes but nothing to shine them with before you go to that important job interview?

Well if you like to eat bananas, and who doesn't?...your problem is already solved!

Bananas are a great source of vitamins and make a healthy snack, but they are also a shoe-shine-secret. 

Just do this:

In lieu of dumpster-diving, find a fresh banana and eat it, remembering to save the banana-peel for this execise in shoe-shining.

Finished eating?

Now take your banana peel and fold it over, so that the INSIDE is facing outward.

This is a tricky manuever and you may want to get a friend or relative help you with it.

Now, grasping the shoe in one hand, (use your left or right hand--this is optional) and the banana peel in the other (use the opposite hand from the one above--this is NOT optional), start to make polishing movements, in a kind of circular motion, all over the surface of your dirty shoes.

Just keep doing this until you have covered the surface of the shoe at least once or twice.

Now repeat with the other shoe.  You don't want just one shiny shoe.  You are a bipedal animal and hence have two feet, and thus two shoes.

If you were a cat, you would have four shoes I suppose.  But cats polish their shoes with their tongues, so no need to explain that.  

Now get a shammy, or other soft cloth. Holding it in your right or left hand, (let's not go through that again) start the same circular motion you did with the folded banana peel.

Buff all the shoe up to thirty times per shoe, until the sparkle is so bright you need sunglasses just to look at your feet.

This 'buffing' stage is important because, scientifically speaking, it works the banana oils, that you have deposited on the shoes in the previous step, INTO the shoe surface, thus allowing the interaction of the oils with the surface and producing, in the process, the lovely shine you know and love and want for all your shoes. (Except for tennis, running, and sandal shoe-wear perhaps).