The most awkward of traveling salesmen are the religious doorknockers. They cold call right there in front of you and create the perfect situation to get a door slammed right in their face. This isn't very nice, so now we will explore alternatives to what is basically just saying NO.

When I was younger, door-to-door folks were everywhere. I lived in a new subdivision so everyone visited me from the Jehovah's Witnesses to the Collier's Encyclopedia salesman. They all wanted one thing - my time, attention and agreement to "buy" their spiel.

Today we don't see as many vacuum cleaner sales people but we do see various religious groups. Part of their pathway to personal salvation and status in their churches is to go out and spread the Word. They truly do believe that it is by personal contact that they will be able to present their religious views. It doesn't necessarily need to be met with anger and irritation.

As a practicing Christian I am not interested in hearing about views from religions I may consider contrary to my viewpoint, but I also recognize that these people are as passionate in their beliefs as I am in mine. I don't slam the door. I explain my commitment to my church and thank them for the courage they show to go into a basically non-religious community and try to work for their God.

An Indian Holy Man wandered into the showroom a week or so ago and gave me a bean, which he had blessed. He told me about his mission and asked for a donation. He didn't get one, but I was as polite to him as I would have been to a customer and I thanked him for coming in to see me. He really did brighten my day. As we were both bowing to each other, I considered him to have been one of the unusual characters I see so often in Hollywood.

I can usually spot young men on their mission from the Church of Latter Day Saints. They dress in dark pants, white shirts, ties and bicycle helmets. No, I don't want to join their church, but they are refreshingly polite, clean and sincere. I listen, thank them and close the door. I hope that they know I wish them well and that I respect their zeal.

Over these years I can remember a few times I've been involved in some door-to-door stuff myself. When I was trying to help our church get their summer vacation Bible school off the ground, I went out and door knocked at the places I knew had kids. It was free and fun and many the mom took the circular and sent their kids if only for a few hours respite. I didn't consider myself a proselytizer trying to lure their children into my church. Even moving through neighborhoods singing Christmas carols and passing out invitations to join us for Christmas Eve service is thinly veiled door-to-door peddling of religion. The Jews in my vicinity are not terribly interested, but they don't slam the door on our little quartets either. Basic manners prevail.

If a person doesn't want to engage at all, there are professional signs that say no solicitation of any kind. People get the message. If someone comes who is selling whatever, point to the sign and shut the door - never a word exchanged. The worst thing a person can do is to get angry, curse and shout. This makes that person look like a total ass and very much in need of a little religious counseling. A smile and a nod and a no thank you will work just as well.

We're all just trying to get by in this world and even if you did have to get up off the couch and answer the door, try not to take the disturbance personally. The guy or girl on the other side is just trying to do what they must and what if you did need a friend at that time? Well, Karma led them to your doorbell and you can bite or not. Just don't snarl.