It's true looks influence our lives. We may not agree or have philosophical ideas about it, we may question it all the time, however our society, western civilization pays big attention to looks. Is it right? Is it wrong? Nobody knows the absolute answer. It is the result of our evolution as society and answers are not easy to get. The opinion always depends on the person who answers this question.

In the western world, our supposedly civilized nations, look plays an important role in society. Styles, fashion, sports, art, phylosophy of living, jobs, hobbies, nationalities are currently identified by the way a person looks. It seems that styles exist to unable everyone to take a quick look and to identify even quicker to which group that person belongs to. Clubs of sports, literature circles, art expositions, fashion meetings, scientific interests, bussiness and others are easy to identify by a person's behavior and by a person's look.

We may not pay attention to it, but the way we dress is a way of communicating with the outside how we feel inside. It is obvious that not to care about clothes is a style as well. Communicating our indiference, our happiness, our obsession towards jeans or shirts are easy catches at first glance. No matter what we dress, no matter which colors we choose, our personality print is carved on the clothes we choose, their shape and the way we put them together.

Models and actresses, actors and stars are in general seen as beauty icons. In the world of television, magazines, cinema, show business they are cited inumerous times as patterns of beauty and they are elected by the public as number one, number two and so on. They dictate the trends of good looking. Good or bad, our eyes get used to those patterns of looks, shapes of bodies, hair styles, modes of behavior. By habit, and even non conscientiously, our brain starts to connect what our eyes see with definitions of good looking, healthy, beauty. lovely and handsome. Across the centuries and the times, definitions of beauty and health changed according to social and economical situations.

Nowadays, thickness in women and strength in men are the beauty foundations. Women, often, want to get skinnier and skinnier, live a life time obsessed with a theoretical weight they never seem to reach and live unhappy most of the time because they should ALWAYS be thinner than they are. Men, often, work out constantly until exhaustion, increase their muscles amanzingly and think they are not looking strong enough. Meanwhile...

How far is heaven?

Woman, how skinny should you get?

Man, how strong should you be?

Anorexia is an eating disorder behavior where the victims prive themselves from eating. They maintain a weight much lower than what would be thought as normal and they refuse to accept they are skinny. Bulimia is another eating disorder where the victim eats and forces herself to purge. The person can eat compulsively and then because she feels guilty about what she ate, she forces herself to vomit. Both these diseases have deep pshychological issues and people who suffer from those are usually obsessed with their body image and weight. These diseases usually affect women especially when they are teenagers. If not healed at time these diseases can lead the victim to death.

Biggerexia is an excessive workout, an indulgence in bodybuilder behavior, that affects some men. Men who suffer from this disease see themselves as weak on the mirror. They feel they are not strong enough or large enough. They continuously think they need to build more muscles and to workout more and more and more... Some might take steroids to help build the muscles they dream about.

If we take a closer look to these behaviors, it is easy to conclude that they can be consequences of a variety of psychological unsolved issues. Feeling down and depressed, lack of love from others, having low self-esteem, feeling lonely or feeling an unbearable fear of getting fat can be some of them. The fear of getting fat for women or being weak for men come directly from the fear of being rejected by the society. By an eventual boyfriend / girlfriend, by friends...

There is a thin line that divides being skinny and elegant and healthy than being unhealthy skinny. You are your own compass, and pay attention to your own definitions of beauty. Bodies are a reflection of ourselves, of our eating habbits, of our workout habbits, of our life style. Food is our fuel, so it is very important to maintain a healthy food plan. It is important that we understand modeling as a job that not all of us have to do. Size zero for women depends on your body constitution. You don't have to look like any model, because your body is totally different than hers. We are all different, so why should we want to look alike? People who really care about us like us unconditionally and that doesn't have to do with the way we look. If someone is with us because of the way we look, maybe we must think twice about that relationship. Is that what we are looking for? There is nothing wrong in being pretty or handsome or giving our best to look the greatest that we can! The issue arises if we only care about this in our lives. People need to have substance, interior, thoughts, opinions, not only looks. Why should we be just the outer part of us?

Beauty is in the way we express ourselves and we put ourselves together. There is nothing wrong about wanting to get thinner (women) or stronger (men), but indulging in these objectives may have side effects on your body, brain and spirit.

Holywood stars, famous singers and models are available to weight fluctuations. Because they are famous we can see them in different phases of their lives. Weight loss caused by depressions or work pressure, need to get thinner to play a role in a movie can be some of the causes. Kate Bosworth and Victoria Beckman are good examples of healthy stars that lost weight earning a "too skinny" look that is barely healthy. Which pictures do you like the most?

Excessive weight loss is related to psychologic difficulty in accepting her image as skinny. This has to do with an utopical view of body image. The person doesn't agree she is slim enough and can't see herself as skinny. She feels she needs to lose weight constantly.

The fantasy of size zero as maximum objective to be elegant as a model is fake. Size zero is made for small people who are skinny by nature (think about japanese women, who have thin bones and bodies). Not everyone can wear size zero. Forcing a size on you is the first sign you don't feel well with yourself. Feeling healthy is more important than being a size zero. You choose. You make your own heaven.

In 2006, Luisel Ramos, a 18 years old model, died by starving herself to death. Six months later her younger sister died by starvation as well. After these incidents, Spain didn't allow models with BMI (body mass index) less than 18 to participate in catwalk shows. Australia went the other way and Australia Fashion week was nearly cancelled that year, because Mara Joara bikini collection had chosen models like the ones on the right side of this text. These girls were considered too fat for the catwalk.

Belinda Roberts is a swimwear model who isn't accepted by models agencies for catwalk shows. She is considered too fat for the catwalk show and for some photographic sessions. Belinda says once she has considered to lose weight to be able to be in catwalk shows. She didn't put it in practice, because she says her body would be out of proportion if she starved. Belinda says she'd rather eat and end her days feeling healthy and happy.

Skinny models are still accepted in catwalk shows by many designers. The reason is that they consider their clothes as pieces of art and they want to show their clothes as you would see them in a store. In a store we see clothes on clothes hangers. The skinny obsession on the catwalks comes from that principle. The skinnier the model is the more the dress, the skirt or the bikini looks without body expression as in a store. When you buy clothes you naturally give them life and your personal expression. Models are still used, by some designers, to walk with their clothes and they are not expected to add any expression to what they are wearing. They are not chosen because they look normal people, they are chosen because they look skinny as clothes hangers. Is there any hope left?

If you or any of your friends want to calculate your BMI, here is how to do it. It's very simple:

BMI = weight (Kg) / height ² (m²) 1 Kg = 2.2 pounds; 1 m = 3.28 feet

anorexia < 17.5 (F and M)

underweight < 19.1 (F) < 20.7 (M)

normal 19.1 - 25.8 (F) 20.7 - 26.4 (M)

marginally overweight 25.8 - 27.3 (F) 26.4 - 27.8 (M)

overweight 27.3 - 31.1 (F) 27.8 - 32.2 (M)

obese > 31.1 (F) > 32.2 (M)

severely obese 35 - 40 (F and M)

morbidly obese 40 - 50 (F and M)

super obese 50 - 60 (F and M)

If you are overweighted and want to lose weight until you reach a normal BMI, please consider visiting a nutritionist or your doctor first. They can help you making a nice and healthy meal plan so you can reach your objectives. Sports are essential as well and knowing what you like to do is the best way to spend some hours per week working out. Choose something you like. That way will be much easier to go and not getting excuses to stay at home instead of exercising.

Symptoms of hell

If you know someone with the following symptoms of anorexia or bulimia or biggerexia, please try to help this person. Be aware that the person is not going to give in easily. Understanding and caring are the best ways to pull that person into reality again. Tell her / him to go to a psychologist, to try to speak about what she / he feels, to try to heal herself / himself. Hear what she / he has to say. They might sound depressed about their look and her / his maximum attention can be towards her / his body all the time, no matter what is going on on the world.

Anorexia and Bulimia

• person thinks her weight needs to be 85 % or less than what is normal for her age and height;
• intense and overwhelming fear of getting fat
• body shape and size is directly related to how good she feels
• denies she is skinny
• cannot objectively evaluate her weight
• dramatic weight loss in a short period of time
• mood swings, depression, fatigue
• loss of menstrual cycle
• obsession with calories and food contents
• dizziness and headaches
• blood shot or bleeding in the eyes
• hair loss
• grey or pale skin color

Anorexia

• refuses eating with people
• refuses eating

Bulimia

• flushing food down the toilet
• running to the bathroom after each meal and purge
• saying she doesn't feel well and needs to vomit the food she ate some minutes ago

Biggerexia

• big and non proportional muscles look good for him
• over works out
• takes steroids to help building muscles
• ignores tireness for working out too much

Set realistic goals for yourself and discover and enjoy yourself the way you are! Be happy with what you have and improve what is yours without wanting to be someone else, because you ... are you! And you are unique in our world!!! Be happy!