First, know this: this article isn't intended as a guide to getting you laid, but I bet it will.

Men, you know I love you. Maybe I love you too much. That is why I refuse to waste your time or insult your intelligence with stupid common sense tips ("Use deodorant! Brush your teeth! Always be a good listener!") that you've already read in Maxim.

Here are a couple of less-than-obvious ways to become sexy (or sexier). This stuff can havea big impact on your sexiness ranking in our books.

This info comes straight from the mouths of your wives, girlfriends, lovers, and conquests. It's the stuff we tell each other, but don't share with you.

But, like I said, I love you. And I just wanted you to know.

Women find security and safety to be very appealing.  Since a lot of us are your baby mamas, our top priority is to love and nurture your offspring.  When you show that you love the very thing we would readily die for, it makes us melt.  Makes sense, right?

Therefore, sexy is the man who picks up and soothes a crying toddler without being asked.  Also very sexy is the man who bends down so his daughter can whisper in his ear.  Or who comes home early from work so he can catch his son's swim meet.  Or who smiles at you across the room when the baby falls asleep curled up on his chest.  Sigh.  There's just something about it.  It warms our hearts. . .and other anatomical features.

The game of cat-and-mouse is as old as time, but we all still play. Here is how to win.

Not every touch, glance, or caress should be classified under "F" for "foreplay" (or other "f" words that may spring to mind). In fact, affection without expectation can work to your advantage.

Say you and your girlfriend get home from work at the same time. You're both burned out. You kick off your shoes (or boots), loosen the tie (or hang up the uniform) and just give her a really sweet kiss on the forehead, and maybe a hug. Not a mauling, a hug. Look her in the eye with your hands on her shoulders, and tell her you want to hear about her day, but you need a quick shower first. DO NOT ASK HER TO JOIN YOU. Then walk away.

This scenario will only end well for you, my friend.  Physical affection sans expectation will illicit a response, even if she's tired. That shower door may slide open while you're still in there.  At the very least, you'll have a cold beer waiting for you when you get out.

Trust me on this. Try it and see. Please report back your findings in the comment box below.

You don't have to rent a tux. Here are the things we like to see you in, period.

• Boxers
• Levis and a white tee shirt
• Levis and a white button down shirt, ironed.
• uniform (not fast food)
• khaki pants, navy blazer, nice tie (that's a personal preference.)
• Levis, no shoes, no shirt
• A nice, masculine watch. No rubber or plastic. Metal watch band is best, leather band if you have to.
• Tattoos and nothing else (some women/know your audience)
• Tux (sorry, I lied. We all love a man in a tux. Blame Sean Connery.)

• a dab of cologne
• some Irish spring soap rubbed on the pulse points. No kidding. Take a dry bar of Irish Spring, rub gently on your wrists, behind your ears, and on the back of your neck. Watch the magic as it happens
• Getting along with her family
• Being nice to waiters and waitresses
• Being polite in general
• Doing things that are helpful without being asked (huge: think trash, toilet paper roll, making the bed)
• Remembering anniversaries
• Doing the planning for a special night out
• Surprises (card on windshield, fill up gas tank, gift card to her favorite store)
• Being sincere
• Being tactful
• Being honest

With a little patience and practice, these tips will up your sexiness quotient in no time.  Notice that not one of them required you to set foot in a gym, or spend an inordinate amount of time or money.

Good luck, men.  Now go out there and bring the sexy back.