The first thing you need to do if you want to get your ex back is figure out exactly what went wrong in the first place.  You may be under the assumption that the breakup was all your ex's fault, but if you want a good chance at getting them back, you need to figure out if there was anything you did that contributed to it.

There are several very common reasons that relationships break up:

• Money issues
• Cheating
• Temper and anger issues
• Boredom
• An argument that got out of control
• Jealousy or suspicion
• One person trying to control the other

There are many other reasons why relationships break up, but these are some of the most common.  You need to take a long look at the relationship and figure out if there was anything you did to contribute to the relationship's demise.

If your partner cheated on you, perhaps you were being distant or not spending enough time with them.  While this is certainly NOT an excuse for them to cheat on you, if you could work on the issue that caused them to stray, you might be able to repair the relationship and prevent a future reocurrance of the event.

If you had a bad temper which caused arguments, you could seek counseling or attend anger management classes.  Don't be embarrassed to seek help if you really need it.

Remember, your relationship is the most important thing to you.  You want to get your ex back, right?  If so, you need to put aside any of your own insecurities and issues and work on them any way you can.  This is the FIRST step in getting back your ex!

If you are serious about getting your ex back, I HIGHLY recommend getting a copy of The Magic of Making Up.

This book tells you EXACTLY why relationships fail, what to do to fix the problem, how to get your ex to take you back with open arms, and how to make sure the relationship doesn't fail again!

This book helped my sister get her ex boyfriend back when she'd tried everything else she could think of and failed. They got married 6 months ago and have a baby on the way!

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Once you've managed to rectify the problem that contributed to the breakup, it's time to prove it to your ex. They may be skeptical, because it's hard to believe people can change, especially if the problem has been long-lasting or recurring.

You need to sit down with your ex and explain that you understand that you contributed to the breakup, and you're ready to change. Don't wait for your ex to tell you what the problem was. Tell them first! Tell them you understand what you did, and you're already working on fixing it. Show them some kind of proof, like a receipt from the therapist or even "social proof" from someone he or she trusts.

If you want to get your ex back, you have to take the action. You can't wait for them to come to you. If you do, they may end up with someone else before you get a chance to prove how you're making changes.

Remember, above all else, do NOT blame them for anything. Even if they cheated on you, yelled at you, called you names, or anything else... if you want them back you can't mention any of this! Just tell them how YOU messed up. And believe me, if you search your soul you WILL find ways you contributed to the breakup.

You can help them work on their issues later, when the two of you are together again. But if you really want your ex back, you have to concentrate on what YOU did first.

Need more help?

Click here to get The Magic of Making Up!