How to Raise Healthy, Productive Children

Never before, they reported, has this country seen more kids suffering from emotional and behavioral disorders.

The panel's findings were bolstered by some alarming statistics. Among them:

* About 21 percent of children ages 9 to 17 have a diagnosable mental disorder or addiction.

* One of every four adolescents is at risk of becoming an unproductive adult.

* Of high school students, 8 percent suffer from clinical depression and 20 percent report having considered suicide in the past year.

Many childhood experts believe that society itself is at the root of the problem. Psychologist James Garbarino has written two books on the subject, "Raising Children in a Socially Toxic Environment" and "Parents Under Siege." A related book with an even gloomier title is Robert Shaw's "The Epidemic: The Rot of American Culture and the Resultant Plague of Joyless, Selfish Children."

If all this talk about our toxic society-and the toll it's taking on kids-has you running for cover, you should know that there's good news:

Today's parents don't face insurmountable odds in their efforts to raise resilient, responsible children. In fact, following the advice that has been around for generations-and has recently been reiterated by childhood specialists around the country-works wonders.

Get an Early Start

Let's start at the beginning, when your child is a baby. Forming an attachment with her during her first year of life is critical to future development. Studies show that babies thrive when they're nurtured in a stable, safe environment. So spend as much time as you can with your baby during the first 12 months of life. Don't leave your infant in the hands of a caretaker until you have thoroughly evaluated that caretaker's qualifications and skills.

If your child is enrolled at a daycare center, monitor how she's doing. How can you do that if you're not there? In "The Epidemic" Shaw offers the following warning signs that an infant, toddler or preschooler is not receiving adequate care:

* Your child resists being left with the child-care provider-not just on an odd morning, but consistently. This suggests she's not comfortable in this environment or with the caregiver-or maybe she needs more time with you.

* Your child's personality takes a turn for the worse. She's become clingier, crankier and less manageable. This suggests the caregiver may have a parenting style that's at odds with your own.

* Your caregiver complains frequently about your child's behavior. This suggests the caregiver may not like your child, has unrealistic expectations or may not know enough about children to be taking care of them.

* Your caregiver reports that your child naps longer or more frequently than she does at home, which suggests your child is not being stimulated or is being ignored.

Check Your Schedule

Now let's move past the early childhood years, when kids are old enough to participate in extracurricular activities.

Are you and your family running from one practice, lesson or rehearsal to the next? If so, you're not alone. Over the last 20 years, parents have overscheduled their children in an assortment of activities.

To scale back the after-school rush, limit extracurricular activities to no more than two for each child. Don't allow your children to participate in anything that coincides with dinnertime, which should be used as an opportunity for the whole family to interact. In short, make time to be a family. To that end, place limits on TV watching, video games, Internet surfing and any other diversion that isolates your kids from you.

Getting Back to God Another

recommendation is to nurture a sense of spirituality and religiosity in your children. This helps kids appreciate that there's meaning to life; it keeps them connected to humanity. What's more, kids with a strong spiritual core are less likely to feel lost and more inclined to exhibit kind and charitable behavior toward others.

Isn't it interesting that contemporary child experts are returning to the same advice that their predecessors preached, so many years ago, as an antidote to society's negative temptations? I have worked with children for more than three decades, and I'm compelled to agree: there is much to gain by going back to the basics we have lost sight of in our busy, modern lives.