How to improve your negotiating skills
69How to negotiate effectively
Negotiation is the art of getting an opposing party to agree to your terms or to reach a settlement as part of a dispute resolution or a preemptive measure against avoidable conflict. It is a psychological battle between two sides to get the better of each other. There are two kinds of negotiations namely;
1. An offer to grant or give something in return for something more valuable or less damaging
2. A request for something to be granted with an accompanying threat if declined
Why People negotiate
Negotiation is beneficial because it offers a win-win situation for all sides involved or as a means of effecting damage control. Virtually every area of human interaction involves negotiation of one kind or the other. From politics to business even diplomacy, negotiation is indispensable. Negotiations serve many purposes in labor disputes, management crisis, divorce settlements, plea bargaining, out of court settlements, commercial takeovers, party nominations, haggling over price with traders and a host of other situations. The end result of negotiation however is to offer an acceptable outcome to all involved in the process.
Since we know that people negotiate, what we need to learn now is how to get the best out of negotiation. We want to know how best and when to negotiate so that at the very least we are satisfied with the outcome of the negotiation or in other cases be ahead of the opposing party.
The recommended techniques for carrying out an effective negotiation
Size up the other party
The other party has to be sized up in terms of its ability to carry out damage. The stronger side can usually carry out greater damage if it is sidelined in the negotiation and most times the stronger party is aware of this and as a result is in the driving seat of the negotiation. So check to know who is in the driving seat. The side that stands to lose more if the negotiation is not reached is the weaker side while the stronger side can fare better if the negotiation doesn’t pull through. However, both sides could also be equally matched then in that case the negotiation becomes a battle of wits.
Have a definite goal
Before coming to the negotiation table, have a goal or set of goals you wish to achieve. For instance in a hostage situation, the negotiator is primarily after the safety and rescue of hostages while having a secondary goal of apprehending the terrorists or hostage takers. In the same way there is usually a hierarchy of goals that should be pursued in a negotiation but this largely depends on the kind of situation. The primary or more important goal is what must be achieved first before the secondary goal and so on. However if the primary goal is not realistic or achievable then pursue the second goal and so on.
Make the other party believe you will benefit less from the negotiation if you are offering something in return for another thing and vice versa
The other party from the negotiation must be fooled into thinking that you have less benefits to derive from the negotiation but that is if you are the initiator of the negotiating process or if you are making an offer. What you should do instead is to make the other side believe that it is not only in their interest to accept what you are offering but that they stand to benefit more from it than you.
Conversely, you should exaggerate the harm the other party is out to face if you are denied your request. Threats, blackmails and propaganda are not uncommon in this method.
But negotiation does not have to be all dirty, it could also be based on ethical considerations but that is if all parties involved have integrity.
Offer as little as possible to the other party
The saying save the best for last applies very much in negotiation. Try your best never to offer your best resources at the onset of a negotiation. Instead offer as little as possible to the other side only increasing the value of your offer as the other side persists in their demands. Of course they too should be willing to offer something in return for your consideration but always remember who is in the driving seat.
Demand as much as possible from the other party
Demand as much as possible from the onset when negotiating, don’t start with the smallest demand but with the highest most realistic demand possible. For instance hostage negotiators would initially ask for all or most of the hostages to be released in return for some favors.
Hold back your intentions or goals from the opposing party
The other person shouldn’t know your real intentions towards him/her except if it is in a hostile situation and if you are in the driving seat. The weaker side should hold back as much information as possible preferring to be flexible and alert to situations that might cause the table to turn in their favor. If you wish to overwhelm the opposition, then by all means do so.
Remain persistent with your demands by insisting on your position but be willing to shift ground when it becomes obvious that you can’t have your way. In this case only agree to shift ground after the other party has made some concessions and ensure that your own concessions are lesser in value to what was offered you.
Final Tips on being a better negotiator
If the negotiation is to avoid a dispute with severe consequences, the first thing to consider is what effect those consequences would have on your well being if you fail to reach an agreement to prevent those consequences from ever happening, if you can’t live with those consequences then your best option is to negotiate but of course with the other party having the upper hand. For instance if Afghanistan is threatened with a nuclear attack by say North Korea, Afghanistan would have to consider what will happen to her if she fails to negotiate or agree to the terms of North Korea to prevent a nuclear strike. Agreeing to North Korea’s terms might also be harmful to Afghanistan in such a dilemma the best option will be to choose the lesser evil.
If the negotiation is part of a settlement or dispute resolution both parties must be willing to shift ground and accept each others demands at least to some extent. Both parties should reduce their demands and be willing to accept some of the demands made by the other party provided those demands are realistic.
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