The answer to reducing the number of divorces is easy. Putting it into practice is another thing altogether. You may not agree with me, and that is just fine because I'm not looking to win any popularity contest, I am only going by what is right.

When there are children it truly is a MUST to stay together (unless someone is abusive, a drug/alcohol addict, ax murderer, etc.) Children need thier mom and dad, it is very true that kids from homes with a single parent don't mature emotionally, and perhaps even feel that mom and dad getting divorced is their fault. It is also a very real statistic that kids from broken homes get into more trouble. This could be because of the break up, but more likely that because the one parent has to be the mother and the father and work more than one job to survive (another statistic) there is no real supervision.

Just because you don't like your spouse anymore or your spouse doesn't like you doesn't give you the right to tear up a child's family unit. Yes, even if your spouse is a cheater.You created these kids and you owe it to them to give them the best start in life possible. You need to put yourself and your needs aside to get them raised and graduated. If,after the last one leaves the house, you still want a divorce then present divorce papers to your spouse the day after graduation.

There is nothing in the rule book that says you have to sit and suffer for eternity. It is up to you to take your situation and turn it around. You dont have to sit there day after day staring at the person you once loved. Get involved with community activities, donate your time. Find a hobby. Go out with your friends. Go on trips with your kids. The ideas are countless. Don't sit there for the next 18 years with resentment, because then you will resent your kids. You may hate your spouse, you may think they are a creep in your head, they may be a lying, cheating dirtbag. You know this, it isn't going to change, so why fight about it? Move on with YOUR life, and while your kids are around, be pleasant and happy.

However, are you really looking at the whole picture? How are YOU contributing to the situation? Are you a nag? A control freak? The breakdown doesn't come from just one source. Remember: "It takes two to Tango." Try to talk to your spouse with both of you being honest about what's bothering you, you may find they feel the same as you.

I am not a man hater. I am not a woman hater. I think the cause of divorce is not about gender so much as it is about personalities, and money. Money is the #1 reason for divorce...how sad. That is next to cheating. I'm not even going to bring up abuse, addiction or serial killer, because those are TRUE deal breakers!

However, I also believe that we have a tendency to be in love with the idea of being in love. We meet someone, and three months later we are getting married. We didn't find out their values, morals, religious beliefs, political beliefs;"We just fell in love and now we are going to make it work on a wing and a prayer." Such unrealistic dreams!

I have a feeling that if divorce wasn't so easy to obtain and not as widely accepted today as back in our parents times, people might learn to be a little more selective. But we cannot turn back the hands of time, we live in a totally selfish and disposable world, we dispose of marriage and kids just as easily as disposable diaper.

If there are no kids in the picture, making one is NOT the answer! If you find you have tried every avenue with that person and it just isn't going to work, then get a divorce, just don't make kids. See, I am not opposed to divorce, but I am when there are kids involved.