create your own

Have you ever been flashed?

68
rate or flag this page

By mistyhorizon2003


Yes, these kind of things always seem to happen to me, I really don't know why. When I was about 24 I was working in a quiet Q8 petrol station set on a hill in a Kentish town called "Crowborough". Essentially this petrol station was "a shed on a hill", very small, and just me on the premises with no security cameras.

Fortunately Kent is pretty safe, and never one to be fearful of what "might happen", I was more than happy to work in said petrol station until anything up to 9.00pm at night. However, you can imagine my surprise when one afternoon I was happily minding my own business , along with my cute rescue lurcher "Kizzi", when a man who was a regular, walked into the petrol station and "flashed me". Strangely enough a couple of male members of staff had warned me that something about this guy was "weird" and to "be careful", but I never expected things to happen as they did.


This was a time when you were allowed to smoke in the workplace, and I was a smoker. Sitting behind the till and simply awaiting my next customer, I was not too surprised when this customer came into the site and loitered around for ten minutes before finally deciding to buy a chocolate bar. Polite as ever I served him, (despite his slightly weird staring eyes). It was only when I looked away and he hadn't left that I looked back over the counter, and realised he had whopped his willy / manhood on to the counter and clearly wanted a reaction, (although possibly not the one he got from me!)

Looking at his "member", I decided upon the "no real reaction" approach, and nonchanantly lit up a cigarette, stared casually out of the window, and told him to "put it away", (very calmly).

I did have other options, as I had realised there was a stanley knife right by my hand on a filing cabinet (for opening boxes). I shall leave it to your all too vivid imaginations as to what I could have done with this knife, and what crossed my mind. Luckily for him I restrained myself and went down the "lack of reaction route" that seemed to work.


A little bit surprised my "flasher" left, but didn't bank on the fact I immediately noted his number plate and called the Police.

Straight after I called the Police I called my female employer and said, "You aren't going to believe what has just happened to me". Struggling to restrain my laughter I explained the sequence of events, and once I finished the call I phoned another friend of mine to relay the same story. I wasn't traumatised, more amused than anything, and found the whole incident typical of my life in terms of craziness.

Whilst awaiting the arrival of the Police I carried on dutifully serving my customers, but then, you can imagine my surprise when the very same flasher returned, walked into the petrol station, and asked me if there was "any chance of a kiss", to which I said no as I was engaged. He then left (again), and I double-checked his numberplate as he drove away.

Shortly after the Police arrived in the form of a Police Woman. I told her this man had been back since I called them, and then had to try to keep a straight face whilst in between customers the nice lady Police Officer asked me such wonderful questions as " was it erect, or was it droopy?". I defy anyone not to smirk at least slightly at that question. I answered honestly that I hadn't looked that closely and told her the whole "lighting up the cigarette and staring out of the window" saga.

Eventually all statements taken the officer left. I was completely not traumatised, only amused, but thought little of it, nor did I expect it to come to much until a couple of months later when the Police phoned me up.

Apparently this guy had totally admitted to the offence, and it turned out he was married with two children. He had been fined £300 and bound over to keep the peace for two years. No-one could have been more surprised than me that he had admitted to this, as it was totally my word against his (unless he had prior form I didn't know about). Yes, I was really pleased he was found guilty, but shocked that he had admitted to the offence, and horrified he was married with kids. I suppose it was odd that as the apparent "victim" I was never given any compensation, so I assume that only the government benefited financially from my experience


This is not totally the end of the story however, because about six months later I was working for a different petrol station chain, and this same guy AND his wife came in to pay for their petrol. Needless to say you have never seen a cashier exit a till quicker than I did, as I dashed out to the back office and grabbed a male colleague to go and serve this couple, with a promise to explain why afterwards, (which I did). I just didn't want the weirdo knowing where I worked after he had been successfully prosecuted for flashing at me, after all, you can never be too careful, and even the Wife could have been potentially vindictive, who knows! Best not to take any chances!

Comments

RSS for comments on this Hub

Jewels profile image

Jewels  says:
2 months ago

Firstly I think I'd laugh if some guy flashed at me. Then I'd inform the police because of the potential harm it causes.

VioletSun profile image

VioletSun  says:
2 months ago

Cindy: I was flashed years ago when I was about to enter my NY apt building, and no one was around except for this bummish looking guy who was walking with everything hanging out, and gave me a look to see my reaction. I looked up at a window, and yelled at a make believe boyfriend, and said "did you see that?!!!", the guy ran away in a flash as he thought I was actually talking to someone who saw him. LOL! I admit, I was shaking a little aftewards as he could have been dangerous.

And in the subways in NYC one sees so many depraved behaviors, that in a sense one becomes sort of immune to many things and also very alert.

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

Hi Jewels, so I guess you pretty much did what I did then, "great minds think alike"

Hi Violet, Wow, clever tactic that paid off. I never really felt in danger, but maybe I was not that streetwise then, but certainly he never got the expected reaction I am sure, (actually I suspect /hope I actually made him feel embarrassed due to my lack of a shocked reaction).

Mighty Mom profile image

Mighty Mom  says:
2 months ago

Cindy, Sometimes I do wonder if only you have these (mis)adventures. I will deff say only you write about them so cleverly! I was absolutely NOT expecting your reaction, the gent's coming back wanting a kiss (!!!) and then to top it off, coming in with his wife! I almost would have expected you to say something to the wife:-).

Too funny! Good to see you. Hope all's well over there in Guernsey. xo, MM

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

LOL MM, I do live a very odd life, and there is no way I wanted to comment to the Wife, as it might have either caused a scene or really embarrassed her. Thanks for the great feedback :)

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

PS. All good in Guernsey right now, just getting a bit chilly , but not too bad all in all :)

diogenes  says:
2 months ago

It's your dynamic sex-appeal, Misty: Even got a staid old married man to drop his daks. The coming back for a kiss amused me; did he say what he wanted kissing!

Keep on kiddo! Bob x

elisabethkcmo profile image

elisabethkcmo  says:
2 months ago

Love your reaction of casually lighting a cigarette and telling him to 'put it away'

that's great

fun hub!

ralwus profile image

ralwus  says:
2 months ago

ROFLMAO All I can really say right now is that fruity cartoon is hucking filarious! ahhahaha Only Misty, LOL

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

Hi Bob/diogenes, actually he wasn't old, in fact I would estimate he was about 38 if I had to guess. He didn't say exactly "what" he wanted kissing, (thank goodness), LOL

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

Hi elisabeth, thanks for dropping by, well I guess it must have made him feel a little bit stupid, mind you, he still came back asking for the kiss so I guess he got over it pretty quick :)

Hi Ralwus, thanks for commenting, glad you enjoyed this and it gave you a good laugh too :)

Paradise7 profile image

Paradise7  says:
2 months ago

I'm in with ralwus. That cartoon was the icing on the cake. I like your reaction, which is "Sniff. Big deal. put it away!" Which should take the starch out of any flasher's who-hah.

I did get flashed, only once, when I was a young women in a college campus park area. It was nothing short of amazing to me that the guy would do that, as it was about 10 degrees below zero and I was taking a short cut between the humanities building and the Student Center. I thought the cold must have affected both his brain and his ambitions, as the whole thing looked rather small and wilted.

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

LOL Paradise, I loved the comment "all small and wilted".

I guess most flashers are looking to get a "reaction" from their victim, so my decision not to react with shock or horror probably was the ultimate "put down" for my flasher.

mayhmong profile image

mayhmong  says:
2 months ago

I'm proud of you girl! You kept a straight face like a pro! I can imagine what the other thing you were going to do instead of lighting up that cigarett.

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

LOL, I think you think like I do mayhmong ;) I must admit I really struggled not to laugh when the Policewoman asked me "was it erect or was it droopy?", I could seriously feel my lips twitching and I was trying so hard to be serious.

Suiiki profile image

Suiiki  says:
2 months ago

*snickers* try getting flashed at a Catholic school, by one of your classmates, then getting interveiwed by a female teacher so that she could make a report to the police (They had no women on duty that day, for some reason)

"Was...umm...it...pointing straight out, or was...it...just...hanging there?"

"No Mrs. Esley, his penis was not erect."

The teachers at that school were more uncomfortable with anatomy than the students were! Which is funny, because we were all under 14, I believe the students in my class were about 12 at the time. (It went from preschool to grade 8, after which we seperated out into the high schools, which were mostly sex-segregated, and probably for good reason.)

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

Wonderful tale Suiiki, it is funny how adults seemed to find it harder (no pun intended), to discuss such things with children isn't it. Even parents seem to struggle to talk about sex to their own children!

Christoph Reilly profile image

Christoph Reilly  says:
2 months ago

Ha, ha! This wacky stuff DOES always happen to you! I can tell you what I would do if a guy flashed me and showed me his willie, except I don't think I can write it here. You'd have to delete me. LOL!

Jewels profile image

Jewels  says:
2 months ago

LOL Christoph, would you compare first? :D

Christoph Reilly profile image

Christoph Reilly  says:
2 months ago

Ha,ha! That wouldn't be necessary, Jewels.

Jewels profile image

Jewels  says:
2 months ago

LOL, of course not, goes without looking......I mean saying.

funnebone profile image

funnebone  says:
2 months ago

In order to preserve the spirit in which this HUB was written, I read it with my pants around my ankles. Email me for a JPG.

mayhmong profile image

mayhmong  says:
2 months ago

Wonder if that detail was really necessary?! 0_0

XTASIS profile image

XTASIS  says:
2 months ago

LOL I would have burnt his d°°k with the cigarette !.Enjoy reading it ! Thank you!

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

Hi Christoph, I am sure you would have measured up admirably, (coughs), and I wouldn't have dreamed of calling the Police if it had been your willy on the counter ;)

I am guessing that for obvious reasons you would have reacted somewhat more strongly if a man had flashed at you though ;) Thanks for the welcome giggles.

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

Jewels, you have a very naughty sense of humour, (just like mine) :D

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

Thanks for the mental image funnebone, or should I call you "funneboner"? I think I will politely decline your kind offer of a JPEG. :)

Hi Mayhmong, possibly not, but very funny all the same ;)

Hi XTASIS, I wish I had thought of that at the time, mind you, it could have been quite dangerous if he overreacted to the pain of a the burn. I think the stanley knife would have ensured a more rapid exit down to Casualty, and a less likely chance of his return requesting a "kiss". :)

Lady_E profile image

Lady_E  says:
2 months ago

Like the way you handled him. Well, the way you handled the situation. cool and calm. I would find it disgusting if s/one flashed at me and would just walk or turn away.

Sadly, there are still lots of Flashers out there.

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
2 months ago

Hi Lady_E. Well I wouldn't mind so much if it was George Clooney, but this guy was a creepy scrswny guy, yuk. Thanks for posting here :)

Submit a Comment

Members and Guests

Sign in or sign up and post using a hubpages account.


optional


  • No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked
  • Comments are not for promoting your hubs or other sites

working