How to keep love alive in difficult circumstances

Since you are reading this Article right now, it is safe to assume that either you or someone who is very close to you is going through a difficult time and is feeling as if that last bit of sanity and love is slipping away slowly from under your feet.

The good news is that you can keep love alive even during the most difficult circumstances as long as both Partners are at least willing to do their Part.

The bad news is that this won't be always easy.

Let us take a look at different circumstances and how we can approach our Goal.

The death of a loved one, especially a child.

Loosing a family member we held dear is never easy, but losing a child is downright devastating. Unless your Partner caused the death through abuse, gross neglect or murder, you have to remember that he or she is not at fault and may be in just as much emotional Pain as you are.

Depending on the individual personality, you may either become extremely clingy due to the fear of loosing yet another person or the extreme opposite and shut down all emotional connectedness to anyone around you. Both are normal reactions and at the same time highly destructive to your own psyche as well as to your Relationship. No matter what, keep in mind, that violence is never acceptable no matter what the circumstances. If you are feeling that your pain is turning into uncontrollable anger or your Partner is suffering from that dilemma it is time to find professional help, before you hurt yourself or others.

The most important step here is to stay completely honest with your Partner about what is going on inside of you. Don't keep them guessing as to your sudden withdrawals, outbursts etc. Ask for help if you need it and don't let your Pain out on your Partner through mean spirited behaviors or words. Admit that you are hurting to your-self and your Partner. Don't use it for an excuse to stop living. It is very important to remember that both Genders deal with grief in different ways and that each individual may have a different time span in which the process of grieving may take place. Give your-self and your Partner permission to go through the grieving process in your own way. Instead of turning on each other, draw in on each others strength and give as well as take the safety that you kind find in the arms and heart of the one person you should be able to trust with your life. Your Partner is not your Enemies, but your Ally in all of this.

Money Problems

Unless you are rich, you will have money issues sooner or later. Of course there is a big difference between being a bit short on cash and not knowing how to keep a Roof over your Families head, food in your Belly and clothe on your Back. Depending on the cause of the devastation there may or may not be a guilty Party.

If this is a no fault situation or a one time major mess up, it won't help you to dwell on the cause and effect. If you quit placing blame and fostering guilt feeling and instead band together in an "us against the world" Team, you just won half the Battle.

Now is the time to take a closer look at your own and your Partners Talents and abilities. Notice them, be honest about them and most importantly utilize them to the best to both your abilities. Now is the time to really appreciate what each of you brings to the Table. This is not the right place to wallow in self pity or bloat up in pride.

Which one of you is the better negotiator? Who is the wiser Money Stewart? When it comes to being a Bargain Hunter, who has the gift? There are tons of everyday Talents you or your Partner may possess, that neither of you have really appreciated until now. Pin point them, assign tasks in accordance and make the best use of them for the benefit of your Team.

Honesty, swallowing your Pride and learning to become Part of one Unit not separate individuals that happen to leave under the same room. Once you have accomplished that feat, you will be surprised just how strong this entire situation can make you in your relationship. Close your eyes for just a moment and imagine how incredible it will make you feel to know without the shadow of a doubt that your Love will have your Back and you can depend on your Partner for help and comfort.

As long as you go through the though times together, you will come out just fine and your love will have matured and with this that strengthened considerably.

When the temptation to strike out in anger comes, ignore it and remember that somewhere in there you may just carry a bit of the blame your-self.

Side Note: If this is a Pattern of destruction due to alcohol abuse, drugs, pure laziness etc. you may need to either consider getting out of the Relationship, become the only Provider or get professional help.

An emotional or physical Affair.

Now we are dealing with not only emotional pain, but also the loss of Trust and security. Here you have to be very sure of what you wish to do.

Establish within your-self if this has been an Event (one time occurrence) or if this is a Pattern that is likely to happen again. If this will turn into a Pattern, you may need to let go and move one. Love can only heal so much before it breaks you apart. Please remember that you have to be able to stay emotionally healthy through all of this as well.

If you have decided that this was a one time Event and you are willing to give your Relationship another chance, you have one of the hardest things ahead of you. You will have to act as if this has never happened. With other words, the Affair can never be brought up.

Plus you need to find out what caused the affair. Unless someone is a complete dog (that can be a female or a male) an Affair is only likely to happen if something is missing in the household. Pinpoint where things started going wrong, when you first felt the missing element in your Relationship and then work on fixing the problem on your end.

Return to the time when you were dating. Remember the extra effort you took to please each other, how you take care of your appearance etc. The little things that you used to do for each other?

Don't hold back either, before you close the subject for good, get the answers you need and remember that if the cheating Partner does not take responsibility for his or her actions and does feel true remorse for it, you are in for a world of hurt.

Don't ever hold it over his or her head in an argument either. You will only drive them away from you.

I hope this has given you a few pointers and I wish you the best of luck with your Relationship and Future.