"I can't meditate!" many people say. In contrast, I rarely hear anyone say, "I can't ride a bicycle." Almost everyone learned to ride a bicycle, because they had someone help them initially. Yet when it comes to meditation, too many people try to do it on their own, without the help of a teacher, coach, or group.

What Is The Biggest Stumbling Block?

"I should be able to stop thinking!" This is the biggest misconception that beginners bring to meditation. Unable to stop their thoughts, they conclude they are a failure. Unconsciously they think, "I'm the only one who has this problem!" These beginners mistakenly assume the great meditators of the past did not also struggle at first. What a misconception!

The beginning meditator expects to stop their thoughts through simple self-effort. Imagine that the surface of a pool of water was turbulent. Would you try to calm the turbulence by putting your hand on the water and forcibly trying to smooth out the waves and ripples? Of course not. Trying to do that would only increase the turbulence in the pool. Instead, you would do nothing. You would sit and wait for the pool to settle and for the turbulence to naturally subside.

Likewise with the mind. When a beginner tries to make her mind stop thinking, that just creates more mental turbulence. Frustration over the inability to do the impossible simply creates even more turbulence. No wonder the beginner throws up her hands and gives up. Trying hard to force the mind to stop, the beginner concludes that meditation makes the mind go wild, rather than calming it

Moments of Silence

The beginner thinks of the meditation session as a solid thing, rather than a process composed of moments, each moment different from the next. The beginner imagines meditative stillness to be solid and inert, like a block of wood. Instead, it is dynamic and changing, like floating on water.

The well-taught meditator stays alert for a moment of stillness, like a birdwatcher waiting for a bird to appear. The moment of silence emerges spontaneously and the meditator appreciates it for as long as it lasts. In this way, the well-taught meditator sows the ground for more such moments to emerge.

In contrast, the eager but quickly discouraged beginner notices with distress all the moments of mental activity, and either doesn't notice, or discounts the significance of, a momentary flash of stillness. From the beginner's point of view a moment of stillness is just an insignificant instant amidst a heap of time. But the experienced meditator appreciates that an instant of stillness actually transcends time. From that point of view, time could be said to take place within the instant, rather than the instant taking place in time. Don't worry if this last sentence doesn't make sense to you. It will become clear, if you persevere.

Distract the Overachieving Mind

Wanting to suppress thought creates more thought. I am thinking, "I must suppress thought!" and as I'm thinking this, I am generating more thought, It takes a few sittings to see the humor in this. Thought can only cease when my attempt to make it cease also stops. It's not enough to grasp this intellectually. I have to learn this in my gut, by sitting in meditation enough times. I can't make stillness happen in any linear way, since my attempt would be merely an extension of the existing process of thought.

Instead of focusing on stopping thoughts, focus on following the breath. Or focus on the overall sensation of the body. Of course, following the breath means focusing on the body, since we only feel the breath in relation to the body. Feel your way into the breath. Expand your awareness of the breath. Deepen your acquaintance with it. Every moment that you are simply observing the breath, you are not involved in a chain of discursive thoughts.

Sharpen Your Awareness

Instead of aiming to stop thought, aim to sharpen awareness. Have the goal of observing what is happening in your mind very closely. Observing doesn't mean mentally commenting on it, since mental commentary takes you further away from what you are observing. If mental commentary begins, it becomes necessary to observe that as well.

By observing very closely, our mind naturally becomes still for moments. That's what observation does. We become so curious, so interested, that we are focused on what we are observing, and cease becoming so self-conscious. It's the same with appreciation. When we appreciate we become so focused on what we are appreciating that we are no longer self-conscious. There is just the act of observation, the act of appreciation, the moment of stillness.

The trick is to approach meditation with the idea of having no special expectations. Don't be surprised that the mind doesn't stop. Expect thoughts to arise. And rest in the stillness, when it arises. Don't try to prolong it. Don't try to hold onto it. Don't try to do anything. Just let yourself rest in it.

For more information, check my websites:

www.leominster-meditation.com

www.subtle-energy-exchange.com