I know the title of my hub seems odd. Two months ago, I run into my elementary and high school classmate. We started dating. At the beginning, I didn't feel madly in love with him. I have this problem with familiarity, If I knew a person as a friend or a classmate without any inkling of romantic desire, I find it hard to shift the thought that we could be intimate. This time around it was different. I thought I'd give it a shot. You know the saying, "Curiosity killed the cat", I can relate to it.

He never really liked me when we were kids or teenagers. He avoided me most of the time. He thought I was an overacting, misunderstood individual which I confirmed straight from the horses mouth. I look back and realize it to be true so I never disagree. I never even understood myself very much then. Let alone some people. As the years go by and I became an adult, I got to know myself better. The overacting side of me turned into an artist, a passionate individual, an ambitious girl who wanted more out of life.

The very first time he saw me again after 15 years or so, he fell in love. And I thought, "Darn, it feels good" to know that people you know in the past thinks highly of you now. When we're together, I find myself feeling like a light switch. I get turned off every time I am reminded that he was my former classmate and on again when I realize that he is my boyfriend now.

One time, I thought I'd surprise him and pay him a visit so we could have lunch together. His family was very welcoming. I can feel how much they loved him. I can sense how glad they were to know that their son/brother found a decent and a career woman. Now, I'm sounding like raising my own chair but please wait I am not done yet.

In my years of experience, I have develop the skill of knowing people's reaction, attitude and feelings. You're probably wondering why his family is glad. My boyfriend is a simple guy, quite my opposite, he is contented with his life and doesn't dream big or if he did he doesn't have the drive to achieve it. Perhaps, it has something to do with our culture. A 30 year old guy can still live with his parents and siblings even when he is married because of the close family ties. The fall back is the character of an individual, they become complacent and dependent. And it is considered normal in my culture.

I, on the other hand, grew up without no one so this is where the go getter attitude is developed. I want to make the best out of me, to discover my full potential and live the life that I want. It can be bloody sometimes to climb the ladder of success but if you stay as you are and never do anything to reach your goal is a great disaster. On this note I'd like to say cheers to the people who lived in the U.S and Europe!

Let me go back to my story...the part where I wanted to surprise him for my visit. I was welcomed into their home and his younger brother woke him up. He worked late nights so he is the last to wake up. When I saw him coming out of his room with that sleepy eyes I totally forgot that we were classmates. For the first time, I was afraid of my feelings because I was in love. You probably think this is foolish. How silly of me? The human heart is a mystery. For some who read my hub "http://hubpages.com/hub/INFIDELITY-This-Is-My-Story" you'd probably understand where this fear is coming from.

He didn't call me for a couple of days after the lunch we had together. I learned that he went out with his colleagues after work for a drink. I thought it was very irresponsible not to let me know where he is and not calling since he usually calls me after work for a chat. He apologized and said he forgets everything when he is with his friends. When he is having fun, he couldn't care less who's waiting for him. It added to my fear.

We can never change anyone. I must love him the way he is or leave. It is unwise to stay and keep whining. He is a good person, kind and all but what will life be in the future? Another thing is, his parents doesn't know about my past and I don't want to break their hearts. I want to leave things as they are. I can say to hell with the past, it's over and done but in my culture it does matter. I can say again to hell with culture but this is what defines us. We all have cultures we can never ignore.

The good thing is there are so many things to look forward to. I have dip myself into boiling water once in my life. Pain is painful. I can agree that it is a friend but who wants pain when you can avoid it. Perhaps, in the future I can open myself to love. It's been seven years since Infidelity happened and so far I remained single. I'm still aiming to be great and working on it.

I still remain stupid in the field of love. I cry and laugh about it. It is possible to be less stupid. I look at those who seem to have found their lifetime partner with envy. My mom use to say, " Love never runs out, the next time you meet someone you'd fall in love again in no time, so let things be".