I'd Do Something Else If I Only Knew What It Was

Most people expect work to be a drag. How often have you heard these gems tossed around by hard-edged cranky-types:

That's why they call it work.

No pain, no gain.

If it feels good, it's probably illegal or bad for you.

What if I told you that not only do you have a right to be happy in your work and love what you do, you have a responsibility to be happy in your work and love what you do.

That's right: Being miserable and cranky but doing the work anyway is not a virtue. Let's look at some reasons why not.

Damage Done By and To Cranky Workers

How many times have you had the experience of calling a customer service 800 line to fix a problem, only to get a deadened, robot-like humanoid at the end of a 16 tier phone tree who clearly doesn't care if you burst into flames or die on the spot and maybe even wishes you would do both? You know instantly that that person's job is to make you go away, not help you, and so does the person feebly pretending to care.

How did that make you feel?

Chances are it didn't make the person you were talking to feel very good either. Studies have shown that staying at a stressful job you hate can harm your health and increase your risk of heart disease, stroke, high blood pressure, clinical anxiety and depressive disorders, and more. (And we all know 800 numbers can do this!)

Because stress increases the level of coritsol in your bloodstream and keeps you in a constant state of fight-or-flight, it also tricks your body into thinking it needs to store fat in order to keep you fueled while you flee whatever is upsetting you. But if you are just sitting in a cublicle or office being miserable, that fat just accumulates around your middle.

I'm not making this up: Being unhappy makes you fat. Google it.

You Were Born For Better Things

Every single person on this earth has a unique gift and a need to use that gift. As we slog through a daily routine in survival mode, many of us lose touch with what our unique gift is. That's because for most of our day, we are not valued for our uniqueness, we are valued for how well we conform to someone else's agenda. Such is the nature of work in the 21st century.

When this someone else is a real person who shares our basic values and passions, that's not necessarily a bad thing. Having a day job is not by itself evil or bad for you. But when this someone else calling the shots is not a person at all but rather a corporate profit-machine, a day job can be totally miserable.

Corporate jobs are notoriously soul-killing, and usually they come with a requirement that all workers act happy no matter what. Probably you will be issued logo t-shirts and have rallies you dont' want to attend and rewards you don't want to get, and even worse, you will have to act like you think that is really, really exciting even if you think it is really, really stupid.

If you do think that sort of thing is really exciting, you can stop reading now.

If not, you don't have to give up. You do have choices. The trick is being able to see them.

But I Don't Know What I Want, I Just Know What I Don't Want

Actually you do know exactly what you want. You've either just forgotten, or you've allowed yourself to be intimidated into pretending you want something else.

You can tap back into who you are using either or both of the following exercises:

1) Ask. This one might feel silly at first, but it works. Set aside some quiet time and sit in a comfortable position and close your eyes. Begin by breathing in and then out, very slowly from your belly. Your belly should extend out as far as possible on the in breath, then contract on the out breath. Do this for at least 50 breaths, or until it feels natural. If soft instrumental music helps you relax, you can play some while you do this breathing. When you are feeling very relaxed and your mind is quiet, ask (inside your head, or out loud, whichever feels comfortable), "What is my true passion?" Ask as though you expect an answer.

Actually you can ask any question i nthis state, but we are talking about how to remember who you are here, so start with that. Then wait for an image t ocome to you. Something will "pop into your head." No matter how nonsensical it might seem, take the first image that comes, or the first "answer" however you experience the answer. Now sit down and write out in as much detail what you experienced, and if you can, make a collage or cut out an image that comes close to what your "answer" was. Then put both the image and the writing away and forget about it.

That's right--forget about it. What will happen is that within an hour, a day, a week, a month, you will have an "Aha!" moment that brings you back to the image and or answer you received, something that makes it all start to come together in a very exciting way. You will begin to remember who you are.

2) Imagine Yourself Backwards. Maybe you already have a pretty good idea of what your dream life would look and feel like, but you assume that life is completely unattainable. Start by writing out this ideal life as if it has already happened and you are living it right now to the fullest. Describe your ideal life in as much sensual detail as possible. What do you look like? How do you feel? Where do you live? What is your daily routine like? Who are your friends? The more detailed and vivid the description the better. Don't censor yourself, this is your dream life, after all, and this writing is for you and you alone. If you are a visual sort of person, a collage or drawing is a good thing at this point to include with your description.

Now put all that away and get out a sheet of paper, or better yet, a journal or notebook. Write out one thing you are going to do today to move yourself a millimeter closer to that life. It doesn't have to be anything big. Say you described yourself lying on a beach in Jamaica sipping a daquiri. Today you could pick up a travel magazine or brochure, rent a movie about Jamaica, go online and check out airfares, or make yourself a daquiri and sit out in your front yard--anything as long as its related.

After you've committed to whatever it is you plan to do today, write the following headings: One Week, One Month, Six Months, One Year, Three Years. Under each of these headings you are going to describe your progress toward your ideal life, just a description of what you are actually doing, like the first one. You are basically going to connect today (that magazine) to your goal (that beach in Jamaica) by telling a story about yourself as if it has already happened.

Now put all that away and forget about it. Seriously.

If you do the the first and second exercises thoroughly, you will be amazed at how fast "coincidences" start to happen that move you toward your goal--that life you thought was impossible. Generally you will find that not only do you remember exactly what you want, you end up getting it a lot faster than you expected. Sometimes it happens so fast it can be disorienting.

These techniques have been around for centuries, and there is nothing magical about them. They work by allowing your unconcsious mind to direct your attention to what is already all around you. Your mind connects your desire to what is already in the world. It's that simple. It's not magic, and it's not bad or evil or a big scam. It's just how things work.

Here's an example:

Imagine that a person from a culture without electricity came to visit a modern house and was told beforehand that by touching a button on the wall in each room, light would appear. Some visitors would touch the button right away and think, wow, cool. But some would say, no, that is not possible, only the Sun makes light, that is silly. They wouldn't touch the button because they would not believe in it. Electricity makes the lights come on whether you believe in it or not. But if you don't flip the switch at least once, you won't know that.

And so it goes that discovering what you want and asking for it works too, regardless of what you believe. Some people call it God's benevolence. Some people call it Universal Abundance. Some people call it the Law of Attraction.

I call it extremely cool. Try it. What do you have to lose?