A reader writes: "I've been seeing this guy for about five months. I really care about him. Honestly, I'm beginning to think he might be the one. Our chemistry is so intense. We have been sleeping together for almost four months. I've even met most of his friends and family. The thing is, we haven't had the "talk" about where we stand. I'm honestly not sure he isn't sort of seeing other women occasionally. There is this woman from his work he goes out to dinner with sometimes. He also has a "friend" from the gym he has drinks with every once in a while. I'm not sure how to start the talk about dating exclusively. I'm ready to take this to the next level. I have been for awhile. However, I don't want to push it and scare him away..."

So, here's the bad news. She is probably about four months too late to have the talk. I tend to believe that you shouldn't start sleeping with a man until he's agreed not to be sleeping around. Now, I must admit, that is a rule I haven't always followed. However, with that experience I can honestly say, it was never a good idea for me. If a man is truly interested in you, wants to be with you, and thinks you might share a future, you will know it. There isn't a lot of guess work there. If he thinks you might be together in six months, you probably won't have to ask him to stop sleeping around. If you've been intimate for four months and he's still not crossing the exclusivity threshold, I hate to be cliche, but he's probably not that into you.

That said, our reader has one opportunity to make a final stand. I suggest she have a come to Jesus talk with her beloved that goes something like this. "I'm ready to give this relationship some definition and make a commitment to being an exclusive couple. We've been together long enough I think we both know how we feel. I'm excited about the prospect seeing where we can go. If you aren't ready for that, please be honest with me about your feelings. I will need to move on." This my dear reader is not a threat, it is an ultimatum, and if he stalls or flat our says no, you have to walk, no looking back - period.