If I Could Write a Letter to Me

Writing a letter to your younger self, giving yourself the advice you wish you would have known at say, twenty-one years of age, has become a recent popular trend. So popular in fact, that it even spawned a book, What I Know Now: Letters to My Younger Self by Ellyn Spragins, and a hit song by Brad Paisley, Letter to Me.

But let’s face the truth, friends. It is not in any way, shape, or form possible to write a letter to yourself at a younger age. It is a lovely and romantic notion, and were time machines the stuff of reality and not science-fiction, it would be advisable for us all.

Don’t grow too dismayed at this news, for the antithesis is actually possible. Your younger self truly could write a letter to your older self.

The sad part is that it is undeniably our younger selves who could use the benefit of the advice. Possibly sadder though, is that our younger selves most likely would not listen to the advice even if we were to send it through time. 

Though age brings with it life lessons that can only be learned through time, experience, and mistakes; there are still lessons to be learned when one is aged, as well. (The truly wise never stop learning.) As much as we’re to respect and esteem our elders, are there any of us who has not at one point or another noticed a lack or flaw in one of our elderly generation, and thought to ourselves, “I hope I don’t do that when I’m older…”

I have myself encountered those who have managed to alter their current behaviors as elderly member of society based on their opinions of the elderly when they themselves were in their youth. Conversely, I have also seen those who seem to have forgotten what it was to be young, and show only disdain for the interests and opinions of those younger than them.

So it seems that while one letter would be of more advantage and wisdom than the other, it is utterly impossible. So  the other letter, which stands to benefit a great deal less, but is actually feasible; is the one we will consider today.

Consider where you will be twenty- even thirty- years from now? Where do you imagine yourself? What would you have hoped to accomplish?

What have you observed from those around you who are now of this age that you will find yourself in this measure of time? What do you sometimes wish you could tell them?

Imagine writing a letter to yourself at this advanced age? What would you say? Here are a few of my own ideas:

Time and age can have the affect of souring one’s disposition, and this is understandable. It’s difficult watching the world and society change around you, not always for the better. But remember to stay positive, Sarah, stay sweet. You can never go wrong with choosing love, so make the decision and choose it. You may have the advantage of years and experience on those around you, but remain humble and positive and they will be much more willing to listen to all your acquired wisdom.

Don’t allow the changes in culture to embitter you. Just because things have changed doesn’t mean they’re worse. Try not to confuse nostalgia for days gone by with thinking that the days that are now here are inferior. Reminisce with those in your life who remember the products, music, movies, slogans, and quirks of the years you remember so fondly. And share those memories warmly with the younger generations, as what they are- memories, not as a lecture. And then take some time to learn what is exciting and special about the era you are living in now. Treasure the past, but live in the present.

Alright, Sarah, just because you’ve gotten older doesn’t mean its okay to get lazy about your appearance. People still have to look at you.

You still need to throw away clothes that don’t fit or are from another decade. You need to go shopping every once in awhile and purchase new items for your wardrobe.  No, you don’t need to try and look like your thirty anymore, but you still need to look like you glanced in the mirror before you walked out of the house.

Wear clothes that match. Fill your wardrobe with pieces with simple, classic lines. Don’t forget to wear bursts of color, but use it sparingly. T-shirts and sweatshirts with cute animals on them are okay for around the house, but leave it at that. And Sarah, please don’t wear anything adorned with puffy paint.

Get your hair cut regularly. And then don’t forget to style it. And wear a little makeup; not a lot, just a little. Just enough to show that you didn’t just roll out of bed and walk out of the house.

I know doctors aren’t always the easiest professionals to deal with, and they probably tell you a lot of things you would prefer not to hear. But they are highly trained, and they really do know what they’re talking about. Don’t be afraid to ask questions and voice your opinion. When the need arises, get a second- even third- opinion. But once you have discovered that you absolutely need to do- or not do- one thing or another, please do so. Don’t try to take your health, and thus your future, into your own hands in an area with such serious ramifications.

Eat lots of fruits and vegetables. Drink lots of water. Exercise, even if it’s just a walk each day. Take your vitamins and any other medications the doctors have told you too. And get the tests you are supposed to have when you’re supposed to have them. Your children and grandchildren would like to have you around for many years to come, give them that gift.

Hopefully when you are reading this, you already have a grandchild or two… or more. What a marvelous blessing!

Now, I know you now have the added perspective of being a grandparent- and there is reportedly nothing in life that compares- but I can still speak from the perspective of one having been a grandchild and the mother of my parents’ and in-laws’ grandchildren.

When that marvelous gift of grandchildren does come your way, continue to show your children that they are of the utmost value in your life. Those little ones are small and precious, but they will change and grow and go through periods in their life when grandparents are not cool. But your children need to know that they, in their own right, are still important to you. And they are your link to those beautiful grandbabies. Take time to talk with your children, be willing to spend time alone with them without their little ones underfoot. You will strengthen and reinforce the entire family.

I’m sure you continue to see this, its something that will prove true through the years. Not having enough to do is a vicious circle. You take it easy for awhile, theoretically to rest and refresh and get more energy; but the lack of activity doesn’t lead to more energy, laziness only produces more laziness. The less you do, the less you have the energy to do.

Retirement is wonderful and good and necessary, and I hope you are reaping all the wonderful benefits of it. However, retirement is not synonymous with idleness. Even when you’re retired, you need to keep yourself busy, Sarah. Take that dream vacation. Help out those in need. Volunteer in your community. Get more involved in church. Get together with friends. Hey, if you’re still writing, keep it up! Whatever you do, don’t sit still day after day. Your body and your mind will both deteriorate as a result.

Get up and get moving!

I’ve heard this is a natural part of old age, and if so, you are no doubt participating in the phenomenon. Okay, so it’s apparently not possible to keep control of your… bodily noises anymore, but still. Please, Sarah, when you do inadvertently “break wind” in public, just have the common decency to say excuse me. There is no need to push your cart down the grocery store aisles, shall we say… expressing yourself, and act as if you don’t even notice. I understand it wasn’t intentional, and it’s natural, and all your other reasons that this continues to happen. Excuse yourself.

Part of life is that you never come to place where you have finally achieved and you can just sit back and take it easy. There will always be more: more challenges to rise to, more knowledge to take hold of, more memories to be made, more lessons to be learned. All in all, there will always be more life to be lived.

Never sit back and think you’re done. Take a class. Ask questions. Read books. Watch documentaries. Observe nature. Do something you’ve never done before. Make someone’s wish come true. Fulfill a life-long dream.

Your life isn’t over yet, girl, get up and act like it.