I'm Too White. I'm Too Black. It's Too Much!
62A Three Part Journey To Finding Me
Part I – “White-ified"
At Age 10 our family lived in a lovely block in the MountAiry section of Philadelphia. Daily activities for my sister and me included walking to school in the morning, stops at "Nick's" penny candy store, and jumping double-dutch after school with other kids in the neighborhood. The year is 1980, which also marks the dawn of the casino age in Atlantic City. My stepfather landed a job as an executive in one of the casinos and we moved. To South Seaville, New Jersey. South. Seaville. New. Jersey! If you Google South Seaville, New Jersey, then Philadelphia, PA you will understand why that bared repeating. To say my sister and I had a bit of culture shock would be an understatement. Our new neighborhood did not have any sidewalks or streetlights. And guess what else our neighborhood lacked? Black kids. Not one other black child for miles. What it did have was tons of grass. And trees. And more grass. Oh yes, it also had more white people than I had ever seen before - people who for the most part were less than delighted with our arrival. The big positive is a new, nicer school district - Dennisville Elementary School. My mother made it very clear to us that no matter what school we went to, we were to do well. And we did. In the process, our “white-ification” began.
We did not see much of our biological father during this time, as we lived a couple hours away. You have to understand this about my dad. George Emerson Collette was a really smart guy who died one class short of his PhD. He was not a racist, but a self described “pro-black”. I cannot write that without smiling because he was so serious about this description and I always found it comical that he found this to distinguish him from “real” racists. I do not fault anyone in his generation for that thinking though. My parents and their parents lived through a lot that justifies this position. You might have guessed by now that my dad was a bit of a “smarty-pants.” And being pro-black as he was, he was not happy with the changes he saw taking place with his daughters: mostly the elimination of urban slang and the incorporation of a new dialect. A South Jersey dialect; in his mind….a white dialect. Hence, the word “white-ified” was born. Used in a sentence: “How could your mom let you get so whitified?”
Next Hub, Part II: Oh, I’m Not Black Anymore?
Dennis Township Elementary
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Comments
Assimiliation into European "white" America is by choice. One can choose to rebel against the norm of society or to go with the flow and make the most of their opportunity in the greatest country ever created. Ironically, "white" folks who pick up street slang or other habits from blacks, are accused of being "whiggers." Funny thing is, who really cares about what people think anymore ? Does any of it really matter ? Let's get back to basics as a society, there's only one RACE of people and that's the Human race. All else are subgroups of cultures. All have good, bad, fun, ugly and questionable traditions. Bias is something we all live with, it's human and natural ever since the fall of man. All of us are too quick to accuse someone of being a RACIST. Talking about differences is one thing, but treating people harshly because of their looks is entirely different. I've never met a Hawaiian, Jew, Indian, Spanish or Black person that couldn't easily be called a racist after hearing their words. However, I was in their home breaking bread and having a good time with them as that was happening. ODD EH ? Let's all ENJOY the cool differences the Creator has given us and embrace each other. Painting someone as a racist has turned into an artform for those looking to discredit , spin, and manipulate a jury or voting block. Let he who is without Bias, cast the first accusation. Have a great day and God Bless.
When I read this I had to chime in of course lol! ---All of us are too quick to accuse "someone" of being a RACIST.
I'm not a whigger,but I know quite a few "insert racial term here".I'm not racist either ,but I thought I'd give your hub a breather.You know I'm having a rough time making this rhyme .
Hi Mimi. I'm new to the hubs, but yours was one of the few I first ran across while reading others. Of all, your hub here, "white-ified" has weighed heavy on my mind. I don't know exactly what it is I feel, but the closest I can come to anything is that you must feel some part of your life was stolen from you. Whether that be true or not, I think I just want to tell you that I hope you don't feel that way because since my divorce (12 years ago) I've yearned to live in the south. Warm, slow, not much road rage etc. So, after my divorce I got my chance to move here with a friend. I knew I didn't want to ever move away, if I do, it will be on chance, but I can't see it happening.
When I began to look for the American Dream of owning my own home, I was given a flyer from a friends church. So I came to look at it, and it was just what I wanted, and old country house on a tad bit of land. My questions were about the upkeep of the house and cost ect. normal things one would want to know before buying a home.
I couldn't get in here fast enough. I even gave my downpayment to the family to keep in the bank for two weeks in another state so they could get the loan for their new house. It was all ON TRUST. They could have stolen my money and I could of walked out of here and left them with two mortgages. Neither of us did of course, we are happy with what we got.
To keep with your subject, my town is small, and is predominately black. Not a person goes by my tiny road without a wave & smile. I grew up in an all white school and neighborhood, but as an adult I didn't endure a culture shock as you did as a young girl. But what I have learned is that people will live how they want to live. We want to live in our peaceful little town, and I think I can speak for all of us, we just want to live and let live and be happy here in our small town.
I'm not here to white-ify anybody, as they are not trying to black-ify me. I love this little town, and I love my people. We're peaceful and happy, and I think that's really what life is about. Nobody is trying to run anybody out of town or make life hard for another. I guess what I'm trying to say, is be happy as you can with what life has given you or not given you. In either event, you appear to be a intellegent and insightful person.
If anyone is going to be hateful or rude in any situation, you keep taking the high road and live your life as you see fit. We're all here, we have to make the best of what we can with what we've got, and we've got to do it together!
Peace be with you, wherever you live! -Kathy
Hey Kathy...Thanks so much for sharing with us. I have to say I am sooo happy to have had the experiences I have had... Although my Dad was a very smart guy..."white-ified" is just so ignorant to me, it is funny! I know he wasn't being malicious, he was just being humorous..Oh and he was a family psychologist... You can stop laughing now :-) Hee hee hee I am just grateful my experiences have not soured me to other races...
great hub, y
charll says:
7 months ago
wow- this is only a blip in the life of your whitification. very captivating. i really would love to hear more of the story.