We live in a society that often requires both parents to work and bring home two paychecks for their family to live comfortably. In this case I suggest that you bond in ways after work that require a ritual. Rituals have a way of bonding family members together even when time separates us. A ritual to incorporate Massage into daily life. This is a great way for any parent to reconnect with their baby at the end of the day.

This post was meant as a quick reference guide to teach new parents how to massage / touch their baby in a confident, secure and loving way. Alwasy consult your doctor before you begin a new massage technique.

Wash your hands before with antibacterial soap to eliminate any bacteria you might have picked up on your hands. When you are washing your hands be sure that you soap up for 10 seconds at least before you rinse completely. Warm hands by rubbing your hands together, relax you body and mind taking deep breaths to slow down your circulation. Get grounded and be in the present moment, in Love with your baby. It is only the two of you, baby time. Work was left at work and not brought home.

Always ask permission before you begin the massage. Talk to your baby in a gentle voice asking if they are ready for a massage. I always like to communicate in commentary to my baby just to keep my baby excited and listening to my voice. I ask and when he looks happy while start the massage while telling him what I am doing.

Baby evening Ritual

1. Eat dinner together at the table

2. Warm bath for baby

3. Massage (try a little olive oil as lubricant)

4. Read a story

5. Bed Time

When I was in the hospital after giving birth I was releaved to see that the nurses holding my baby had crafted the resting confident hands skill. It was the young nurse that lacked confidence and her uneasy hands that alarmed my baby and put him in an uneasy state. As soon as she picked my baby up and brought him to the bassinette for the hearing test I could see that she was holding him with awkward hands and seemed to rush in a way that made me and my baby nervous. William Andrew, my new born son cried at the attempts to quiet him in the bassinet. The young nurses attempts were superficial, light, fluttery touch and not comforting. It was this light fluttery touch that I would catch myself doing when I was in a hurry or my mind focused on something other then my baby. I had to get centered and focus on my baby before every massage session. The purpose of this text is to help all Moms feel more comfortable touching their babies.

The skill of Massage is one that you will not want to overlook due to it's importance to your baby. Bonding with your baby is so natural and easy with Massage. Crafting the art of resting hands delivers a message of confidence and love to your baby. When done correctly your baby will learn to develop trust in you.

Resting Hands

You can start with the baby lying on your bed or in his crib, babies clothes on or off. This just depends on your baby's temperature. You do not want your baby to get cold so turn up the heat if you decide to practice this technique with baby only in a diaper. As seen in the image my baby is wearing a nighty on unbuttoned so that his limbs are covered and stay warm. Hands are warm from rubbing them together. Place a relaxed, confident and warm whole hand on your baby's tummy. Always use the whole hand never finger tips because this can cause a ticklish feeling that communicates the wrong message. When we are tickled we do not relax. The baby must relax for resting hands. Breath deeply from your stomach, you are grounded, focused on your baby and always thinking I Love You. Verbally say affirmations. You are so smart. You are growing so fast. Always talking to your baby with a true smile on your face. It is this feeling of love and confidence that must be communicated when carrying your baby, holding him or picking him up after he just got a shot at the pediatrician. He needs to know that you are always there for him in a loving, strong and confident way.

As your baby gets older and grows larger you can lay both hands on his chest and tummy. The resting hands technique is a great way to begin a massage session. Just resting your hands on his chest and tummy allow him to relax and look at you. Think of it as a baby massage starting point.

Tummy Gas Release Massage

My baby was a very gassey baby from the start. He was always breast fed but was gassey enough to have been a bottle fed baby. I used tummy massage often to help digestion and releave gas pain. With a confident left hand slowly make clockwise circles starting under your babies left ribs, circling around below the right ribs and down to above the right pelvis then left pelvis. As the baby grows you can use two hands. When the left hand is in the pelvis area the right hand sweeping clockwise in a half moon from the left ribs to the right ribs only. As the left hand circles back to its starting point lift your right hand off your baby.