Insomnia is something that has happened to quite a few of us during the course of our life and it usually stems down to not being very at peace with oneself for various different reasons.

It could be that there is a problem that you haven't yet been able to resolve and which is worrying you a lot and despite how much you try and forget about it when it is time to go to bed it still persists there at the back of your mind and doesn't let you unwind and begin to relax in order to achieve your much needed sleep.

You might be going through the menopause which is one of the more common causes of insomnia in women and if on top of it you are also having hot night flushes/flashes, then it is even more normal that you will have problems getting to sleep.

You might find, although you hadn't realized it, that the pillow that you have is not suitable for you.  The pillow might be too soft so that when you lie down on it your neck is not at its best angle and may actually be making your neck muscles tense up.  The mattress as well may be too soft and cause your spine to curve too much and consequently give you a bit of back pain so all these things that lead you to have some sort of discomfort or pain are obviously going to hinder you from falling asleep.

Your bedroom should not be too hot but neither too cold.  If you can keep it at a healthy 20º Centigrade this will help a lot.

Have something to eat for supper but quite a while before going to bed because if not you will end up trying to digest your supper while you are in bed and that is also going to hinder you from falling asleep, and also make sure that it is a light supper and nothing too heavy which takes much longer to digest.

A warm bath before bed will also help to loosen up any tight muscles and make it easier for you to relax and if you add a few drops of aromatherapy oil this will help even more.

Clean, cool, crisp sheets will also help you relax as you sink into them.

If having tried to follow all the above it still doesn't work and you just can't get to sleep, well try not to get nervous about it as it is the worst thing that you can do.  Just remember and say to yourself that eventhough you have not fallen asleep and gone into the world of dreams, that you are lying down comfortably on a mattress which is allowing all the muscles in your body to rest and so although your mind is not at rest at least your body is.

Say to yourself that during this particular night you may not end up getting any proper sleep but that it's no big deal because at least your body will have had a rest from being on its feet, walking, sitting, working or what ever and that is already something.  Then try not to fight it.  You can't get too sleep, so while your body is resting your mind will keep itself occupied by thinking of nice things.  Relive in your mind any wonderful moments that you have had in your life, remember nice events that left you with a pleasant feeling and just keep on thinking of nice things.  It could be that after a while you do actually fall asleep but if you don't your mind will at least had a chance to rest from its problems and worries because you will have rested it by thinking of nice things.

When I myself first started suffering from insomnia at the beginning of my menopause I used to end up getting out of bed and doing some housework, like attacking the pile of ironing I had or cleaning out the oven but I don't think it was ever a good idea as doing these sorts of chores does actually waken you up even more and so in the end I opted for the plan of just lying there.  I just say to myself, well if I don't fall asleep tonight so what!!!  My body at least has been rested and eventhough you don't realise it you do actually fall in and out of sleep every now and then eventhough it is just for a few moments and those few moments are better than nothing.

Remind yourself how tired you have felt after a long morning and that how after a good meal at lunch time you have sat down on a sofa to watch the television and without even trying have fallen asleep just for ten minutes.  When you wake up you most probably felt completely renewed and ready to tackle the rest of the day, and so remembering this, if you only fall asleep for ten minutes off and on during the night you have in fact rested your mind as well as your body.

The worst thing to do is to get obssessed about the problem.  Some people go to doctors to ask for sleeping pills to help them out but if you can I would always urge that you try not to go for this option unless your problem becomes really critical. 

I say that I wouldn't go for this option because years ago when I was going through a very difficult divorce and couldn't get to sleep at night because I was so tensed up about the whole thing I got some sleeping tablets and although I managed to get to sleep with them they caused me a whole load of extra problems like sleep walking and feeling exhausted in the mornings and to top it all I eventually also got addicted to them and couldn't get any sleep at all if I didn't take them. 

I had to start to wean myself off them by first cutting them in half for a few weeks, then into quarters and eventually I just had an eighth of the pill at which point I was getting to sleep not because of the tiny bit of pill that I was takking but more due to the idea that the tiny bit of pill that I was taking would make me fall asleep.

Fortunately after about a month or two I was able to fall asleep again without even the tiniest fragment of the pill and I swore never to take sleeping tablets again.  It is much safer to go a whole night without sleeping than take a tablet which can give you some quite strange side effects.

I remember during the period when I was taking this particular pill that I was trying to calm myself down during the day by painting flowers and plants or anything that was pale and peaceful and one night just before going to bed I was quite happy with the way that one particular painting of some pale pink carnations in a blue vase was evolving.  I covered it up with a cloth and placed it out on my terrace, closed the glass doors and went to bed.  I slept like a log with the tablets and then the next morning I got up as normal to wash my teeth, have my bath and make myself my breakfast.  I got dressed and tidied up my bedsitter and just before leaving to go to work I drew the curtains and opened up the glass doors to my terrace to have another look at the painting that I was so pleased about.  Well to my horror, the whole painting was ruined as strokes of brown and black paint had been smudged all over it.  The strokes had been made by mixing all the paints on the palette together to end up producing a dirty dull colour.  The painting was utterly and completely ruined.

I remember looking at it and not being quite sure as to what had happened or maybe I didn't even want to think what had happened as it all seemed so weird.  I sometimes do that, when something is just too baffling I think to myself that I will ponder about it later on as if maybe later on I might get more inspiration as to why something has happened.

The next night I began another painting and went through the same procedure covering it with a cloth and putting it out onto the (covered and glassed in terrace in case any of you might think that it could have been another person - or even my ex husband!!!! - who was ruining my paintings).

The next morning I woke up and this time when I went to the bathroom I realised that I had green paint all over my hands and thought that that was so strange as I am very meticulous after I paint and always clean off any surplus paint from my hands with turpentine.  I was already starting to feel a bit nervous but continued with my usual morning routine leaving the opening of the curtains to the last.  When I eventually opened the curtains and the glass doors there was the lovely painting that I had done the night before also completely ruined, smudged with dirty dark colours and hardly any remnants of the delicate flowers that I had painted.

I had obviously done this but had no recollection of having done it whatsoever.  The only thing I felt was very tired in the morning when I woke up and I now realise that for all I knew I might have been painting in my sleep for something like four, five or even six hours!!!  I had probably sat there in the dark and was just mixing all the colours up without even looking or thinking and so hence a whole load of colours mixed up together will produce dark muddy colours.

When I told my friends about it they were just horrified because as they said - instead of painting I could have done other things like getting hold of the car keys and deciding to take out onto the road or done simply anything and without being conscious at all.

Funnily enough, shortly after this incident the sleeping tablet that I was taking was withdrawn from the market (I am afraid that I can't even remember what it was called as I took it about ten years ago) and so I imagine that it was taken off due to other people going through similar stories to mine.

My mother also took this tablet for a while and it sees that this tablet made you do what you most liked doing, albeit in your sleep, and much as I liked painting my mother loved eating.  And so what she found was that when she woke up in the mornings and went to the kitchen to prepare her breakfast she found that all the doors to the wardrobes were open, there were packets of biscuits and spreads lying all over the work tops, crumbs all over the floor and at least three packets of crisps opened.

She was also horrified as she would never go to bed unless all the kitchen was completely clean and orderly and so she too had obviously been made to do things at night and during her sleep that she was completely unaware of.

So remember that you will not die if you have a few nights with very little or even no sleep and that eventually your body and mind will find a time when it can rest itself whether it be after a good lunch in front of the television or just by lying there on your bed and thinking of nice things.

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