Instant gratification junkies
84Inspired by hate me! hate me! hate me! by Cris A. Honestly, I'm not on Cris's payroll.
Instant gratification is the reason I joined this community a while ago. Instant gratification in the form of an email that let me know a certain author had published a new hub. In the meantime, I got bitten by the mighty HubPages bug.
And what's this bug that seems to bite so many people? I'd say, it's just the same bug that got me engaged in the first place: Instant gratification, not from hearing about a new article, but from being heard and, sometimes, listened to.
This itsy bitsy article doesn't refer to HubPages specifically, it can apply to any online community where people of all cultures and backgrounds coalesce. Here follows my take on the addiction of instant gratification.
The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
Instant Gratification?
The good: To me, that would be vast amount of material available just one click away. The availability of information, stories, news, anything that one can reach in a matter of minutes is really mind blowing, and makes me very grateful.
Another good aspect of "life online" is the amount of different people one can get to "meet", the different cultural perspectives, and the need to learn to interact in an impersonal medium, which I think makes users a bit more sensitive and respectful of others, and facilitates that we all make an effort to carefully word opinions and engage in constructive dialogue. That is very edifying.
The Bad
The amount of material available can be very taxing on one's time and patience. In order to find those hidden jewels, one really needs to sort out through a lot of junk. Maybe not even junk, but stuff that isn't really interesting to one's preferences. One just doesn't know that before clicking, now do we? There is a chance that a lot of time is invested to get where one really wanted to go –sometimes too much to feel fulfillment in the quest.
As time goes by, one learns to discern who in the community will be worth one's time, and discard and not be bothered with the "apparent" junk, but then one is faced with singular dilemma: Keep quiet or even be dishonest about what one thinks is royal junk. And why? Because as part of the community, there is an expectation that one will be social and agreeable within it.
The Ugly
I'd say that is a fair expectation from any community, online or physical. Ironically, however, I think it's harder to avoid hypocrisy in the virtual communities than to do so in real life. One just won't meet this or that person for drinks if there's not a lot in common with them. Instead, online communities fill your inbox whether you like it or not, one is faced with junk whether one wants or not.
You're thinking: You can avoid getting notifications. You can save yourself from clicking. You don't need to leave comments. Basically, baby, you have the prerogative to not go for drinks with all these people and you don't need to be ugly nor a hypocrite while doing so.
That may well be true, but if one isn't active in the community, then one won't get anything back from it, happens to loners in any context. If you keep to yourself, you won't be heard because you don't seem to listen.
One's just as bound to "behave", as one would at a funeral, one's compelled to read and participate even in those pieces that are totally unappealing, because we want the world out there to do the same for us, all the while knowing that our own pieces are also totally uninteresting to others but oh, the joy of knowing one has been heard. It's called reciprocity. It's also called hypocrisy and selfishness. And let me tell you, it's a drag.
Instant gratification, then?
What should be absolute freedom to read and write whatever, ignore whoever, adore the artistes and ditch the totally uninteresting content tends to become a forced behavior of reciprocal and utterly false adoration.
The thing is, as I see it, the good, the bad and the ugly about instant gratification is not really a trait of online communities, but of online users: We turn what ought to be the joy of instant gratification into permanent slavery which, frankly, is anything but gratifying.
Don't let me stop you kids, though, I'm certainly not stopping myself, so who am I to talk? La dee laaaa.
Oh, by the way, did I mention somewhere that this is my opinion and that I'm fundamentally speaking for myself? Just thought I'd mention it again.
- A much nicer take on online behavior: Why I Don't Always Comment Even When I Loved Your Hub ) by k@ri, a spectacularly positive hubber.
- Teresa McGurk says: "real respect for each other can sometimes mean keeping silent instead of lying, or complimenting the font instead of the content". She's one of the great, it would pay to listen to the lady.
- Update: No more instant gratification!
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Comments
Well darn, Feline, I wanted the instant gratification of being the first to respond!
Elena, I agree there's a lot of...stuff...to sift through to find the gems, but YOU are a gem and Hubpages would be lacking without you! (P.S., good morning!)
We can share the honours JamaGenee! :)
Just so you'll know, I'm only leaving a comment because I want you to comment on my next hub. :D LOL! Of course I'm kidding. You're one of my favorite people because you always tell it like it is, and you speak the truth now.
I say bravo to you, and I could probably add some more stuff, but I'm busy lurking and brooding, so revealing my thoughts would contradict that mood. ;)
{{{Elena}}}
Wonderful hub. I definitely am an 'instant gratification' type. It seems I've been that way a long time. I'd get so excited when I knew company would be visiting, or a party was being held, or any other nice thing was going to happen. The anticipation kept me excited. Now, after being here in HP, I recall with humor how excited I got when I knew the only thing left to do was hit the publish button for my very first hub. I was almost in disbelief that something I wrote would now become public for the whole world to see, all with the push of one little button. Quite a nice feeling.
Thanks for sharing :)
Here's what I find Elena, Hubpages is a lot like the shopping you ladies like to do. In shopping, you know where the really good stores are and you like to frequent them....you don't buy everything in that store, but you pick up the stuff you really like and came there to buy. Here on hubpages you have your stores as well....they're called fans. Now I don't read every hub of everyone I'm a fan of......shhhhhhh. What I do, and I suspect most everyone does, is look at the title and read the intro as my stores are revealed to me in my e-mail. With this understanding most hubbers should realize how important that first paragraph is to grabbing their readers. By becoming a fan of someone, it's saying I like your content and your style, let me know when you write more.....but it's not a contract to read every word of every hub and leave appropriate comments...glowing reports.....witty banter. It's only a contract to let you know when the store is open. I probably delete 75% of the e-mail notifications I get. Even my favorites write about stuff I have no interest in, and when they do.....file 13. This way if I leave you a comment, you know I'm sincere. And it pays to shop at a lot of stores that you've never been to....you never know what hubnugget you might find. I also look at hubtivity a lot and try to see what other hubbers that I respect are reading and commenting on....I find a lot of good nuggets this way.
I think we all thrive on instant gratification, not only do I find myself writing hubs and relishing in any comments, I now even find myself going back to hubs that I have made comments upon ,just to read the replies.. lol..definetly got the bug.
Oh, my. I think I'm very gratified by all these comments... Laugh!
Feline and Jama, don't get into a cat fight now :-)
FP, that's a perfect way to call it, "honor bound"! I'm kinda sorry I didn't think of it myself! :-P
Jama, now how do I know you're being sincere and not being nice to me so that I will be in return?! Oh the doubt will be the end of me now! Laugh! I love it how you say "a lot of....stuff" :-) Good day to you, my fave real state broker in all of HubPages! ;-)
Pam, OK, no worries, I'll pay you back with a comment of mine next time you publish. I'm errrrr honor bound now!! Hehehehe! ;-) BESOS to you!
Trish, it's kinda gratifying (pun intended) to know that I'm not the only one that gets filled up with a bout of the silliest and most incontrollable anticipation when I'm about to publish :-)
R.Blue, nice to meet you! I fully agree with everything you wrote in your comment. I think I said pretty much the same in k@ri's hub (the one I linked). The freedom to choose content is great. What bugs me is the "honor code", but it's my own fault if I subject myself to that. Like I said, I'm as guilty as the next person :-)
Hawkesdream, well, welcome to the club! It's a mighty crowded one, it appears! Laugh!
Yes -- I think this is an issue that several of us seem to have become aware of at the same time (maybe we all joined HubPages around the same time?). I try to visit as many hubs as I can of the people I'm really interested in reading. Of these hubs, I leave a thumbs up if I like the content. But if I think the hub really is excellent -- or if I adore the person who wrote it (and a great part of the HubPages community is that I've had the opportunity to get to know, and truthfully appreciate, some folk quite well) -- I'll leave a comment.
But there are other times I comment. I trawl the new hubs list, and new hubbers list; if I see something that looks promising, I will leave an encouraging or welcoming comment there. When I started, I very much appreciated the comments of a few folk who took the time to encourage me.
And then there are the times when a few of us get caught up in a great conversation in the comments section of someone's hub (I don't mean just some of the banter or flirting that goes on, and that can sometimes get more than a little tedious) -- but an honest to goodness discussion of great ideas. That's very interesting to monitor and comment in.
I try to be honest with the folk I like and respect; if I love your hub I'll say I loved it. But just because I happen to like a person's work generally, that does not mean I will like every single hub that person ever writes, period. Some hubs may just not appeal to me. Sometimes I will not comment at all.
SO: thanks, Elena, for adding to this discussion. I do like the support and appreciation of hubpages. But real respect for each other can sometimes mean keeping silent instead of lying, or complimenting the font instead of the content. . . nice font! (just kidding, amiga!). Abrazos, T.
Carrie Fisher said "I hate instant gratification. It takes too long." lol
Elena, as always, your hubs are under the bracket of "what you see is what you get."When I leave a comment on your hub, it's not something perfunctory LOL. You're one the huibbers who write from the heart.
You Go! Very well put. That's why I'm a fan!
On a more serious note, our whole society now is based on instant gratification. See it with the kids at school every day. They expect instant result. When the laptop is slow, they moan and bitch.
Good hub Elena as I am not a fan of the instant gratification and I hate the downs of it even more as I think there should be some longevity to a hub, considering the amount of uninteresting ones, but after about four days, that’s it, you better have another one or be forgotten(slight exaggeration). But I think pretty much in a three day period all the fans come by and you get the support but they must keep moving to the next hub to keep the cycle going. I’ve learned that if I don’t include the comments box, the hub will bomb for the most part, in comparison to one of my dumb humor hubs. And the last time I did it, the amount of emails regarding a hub, was hard to keep up with, and its wasn’t just the handful of people I enjoy hearing from **wink, wink**, they were new fans that I hadn’t built up a relationship with and so it felt a bit awkward to respond so personally. I have to agree with what you said and personally I find myself to be ungratified anymore by the system.
Teresa, the conclusion of your great comment "real respect for each other can sometimes mean keeping silent instead of lying, or complimenting the font instead of the content" will go up in my hub in about one minute, I hope you don't mind.
Not too much I can add to all you said, it's all true as far as this goes for me. There are so many varying circumstances in which one reads a hub and its comments, so many ways of reading depending on the "relationship" one has with the writer.... It's as complex as real life, really :-) I just wanted to make a point that, just as in real life, some shit sucks and standing/supporting it is really hypocritical! Sorry, had to be a bitch at the end, didn't I? Laugh! BESOS to you!
PS: My stuff is just as much shit as the next, everyone please feel free to say so! *WINK*
Francia, WYSIWIG is me, you can be sure of that! And the thing is, I'm trying to actually practice what I preach, no more BS from me 'round here, if I can help it...and myself! Laugh!
RKHenry THANK YOU!
cindyvine, howdo! You're right, we're in the era of instant gratification, and to be honest I don't find fault in that, I just find a lot of fault in hypocrisy :-)
Golden boy o' mine. I think, just my opinion, that you are seriously genuine around here, ready to put your money where your mouth is. You've left the comment capsule out more than once, and that is, in my opinion again, fucking genuine. Fuck gratification, you just do what you feel is right and the devil may care about it.
I was very tempted to leave the comments out of this one, but here's the thing, at the same time I was curious about what people would think about the whole matter. I absolutely don't regret getting to hear the several opinions, but at the same time I feel like a floozy hypocritical fuck. What do I care what people think? You know what I mean?
I know what you mean as I sought to write, just to write and be damned of the consequences, the traffic, scores, and highlights and if I always got to compare my next one to my "best", that's just not right and pretty much I never know what is going to be "my best" and do the comments determine what is best? Of course we know thats not the case, but its the trend of the system. I get that same feeling of being a hyprocrite as I debate whether I should post another hub. But I do enjoy seeing and talking to people about their thoughts on their hubs and the support is always a good thing when people are writing from the heart and not copying wikipedia. I also like to show support because maybe that hub is not the person's "best" but maybe the popularity of one hub will lead others to more work and for people to be more aware of this hubber because they are actually letting you in to see their world. I do wish the hubbers I read mucho success on attracting fans and readers, and thats just cuz I enjoy other people being successful, more confident, and bolder. I leave the comments box now for newer hubbers, so that they feel free to communicate and hate/enjoy along with everyone else, but for me, on my own hubs, I prefer not to have it or at least participate in it.
You're a better person than I am, Golden. You and Teresa both :-) because you do help new hubbers with your contribution and feedback, you guys are generous that way. I don't know that I've helped anyone here, or that I really want to, you know, but I get the feeling I'm not where I'm supposed to be, I feel like a bit of a fluke, if that makes sense. But, sunny side up (as I'll always find the positive in anything!), I do like it here. For all I've said, I DO find great content, even if I have to sort out through the.... stuff :-)
I often feel like I don't belong here either, you're not alone on that. Categories, more categories, phony advice, tips, and a whole boat load of shit. How many ways can someone write the same article, apparently hundreds of times. But we do find real people when we really swim through it. And I can say, you've helped me and given me support when I wasn't so sure.
Dammit, you guys: I'm the biggest fraud here, I think. But I really respect you and Toad.
GT, goes both ways! I mean that!
McGurk, Teresa, ma'am. Please... quit the crap :-) And forgive me for being errrr myself here and telling it like it is. You are brilliant TO ME and if you don't know it, I'm right here to tell you. Besos!
oh bejesus, I feel a group hug coming on. . . .'k; I think we know genuine when we see it. Thank you Elena -- and thank you Toad, too: I appreciate your comments on my work as well as Elena's. There.
*** heart defrosting, I must make it stop***
DEFROST, por favor. By all means. We love a guy with a defrostable heart, don't we? :-) I know I do!
'course we also like them boys in jeans and with six pack abs and...and.... we're just fickle women here, whatcha expect? Laugh!
You're a doll, babes, but some day your *cough* sincerity *cough* will be the end of you. Not with me, I luuuurve you anyway! LOL
Quien es ayer, me pregunto? Eres tu, Cris?
Hey, Teresa. Ayer is.... a dude that I know in real life :-) He and I share a few things, and he is usually keen to tell me how wrong I am --for sure in real life, and every now and then here in HP. I sometimes wish I hadn't told him (yes, dude, YOU!) about this place! Laugh!
Ayer, need a syrupy thingy for your cough? An aspirin? Chicken soup? What's wrong with you, darlin'? Spring flu? I am SO sorry! Laugh!
Elena- Another wonderful hub. I guess my mom always tells me to be patient and wait for the rewards whereas I am of the types who likes instant gratification. I hope I one day make it to the happy median where I know when/where I can have instant gratification and when I have to be patient. I know miles to go for me.... Thumbs up for a thought provoking hub.
Merci beaucoup, CW! Patience is a virtue, and all that :-)
Thanks for the sweet response. I know patience is a virtue but your reply sooner would have been sweeter (me and my instant gratification)...LOL
Ay, CW, that was a fabulous comeback! What a laugh! Talk about instant gratification, eh?! But...but...but... I gotta eat, and read some, too (was catching up with the HubNuggets!) and... and... and... oh, I'm sure you forgive me, you sweet thing, you! Besos!
I was just pulling your leg. No worries!! One does have to have some life besides HP. Hope you are having a great day. I am really looking forward to this weekend. Last weekend we had to help our friends who were moving back to India with packing and all. Besos to you too :D
So much to think about, thank you Elena.
There's a high in getting that comment on a Hub we write or a response to a post we make in the forums; there's the low when those don't happen. There's the wanting to be honest in our comments or on our own profiles about what we think and our intent of being here on HP, but also there's the sniggling personal knowledge (because of the HP scoring system, partly, I think) that we may pander to others' egos, or even to our own, in order to get that higher score. Higher score, which equates to acceptance. There's a conflict there.
Why is HP addictive? Many have shared their stories about this feeling of being addicted. It is not a site like studio101 or qassia or any other that hosts and promotes "original articles". Here, there's an engagement, an engagement that goes beyond tweeting 140 characters or pushing links by tagging feet.
It's a peppery place. Not the only place to practice or fall victim to instant gratification, as you said. But it is pretty powerful.
CW, just the word "moving" curls my toes...and not in a very nice way, if you know what I mean!
Sally, it is powerful, evidently I'm not the first to fall prey to it :-) I think you put it very well when you say "sniggling personal knowledge that we may pander to others' egos, or even to our own". I just thought of all of this the past couple of weeks that I've been away, and I found that if my ego was so small that needed to be pampered this way to stand on its own, then I might as well admit it or get over it. I'm thinking that after admiting it, I'll just get over it, and no more pandering from this Spanish chick. There's enough good content 'round here to keep me going without pretense :) *wink*
This is a thoughtful assessment. I would add that another dark side to it is that some people feel free to be brutally honest or even hateful precisely because they know they will never actually meet you. It's kind of like the false courage people get inside a car. People get so aggressive, but if they didn't have that car around them they'd think twice.
To tell you the truth, I've been reevaluating the time I spend here. The good stuff keeps me writing here more than I should and neglecting more lucrative endeavors. Then I'll have a string of bad experiences and I think, ugh. Pam, grow up. Do some real work, will you?
It's hard to balance I think. I try to be honest without being nasty, but as you say, I only read stuff I'm pretty sure I'll enjoy so what's to be nasty about? Thanks for your thoughts on this Elena. :)
You are right when it comes to sorting and I just noticed that I was number 1 in a forum, that tells you I talk to much. I have actually spoke to several people on the phone and they were wonderful and a delight to chit chat with. We do have nasty people here and we have pleasant people. I do have to say however that you nailed it right on the head, simply put gratification. :)
Elena: I come from the school of thought that says, "if you have nothing nice to say, don't say it", and I try to do this online and in my offline too. If I absolutely dislike a hub such a a racist one, I may give it a thumbs down, or comment without being offensive. As for instant gratification, yup Hubpages provides this, and I can thankfully say, I enjoy practically all the hubbers and hubs I read, this is the reason I read the ones I click on! As a matter of fact, I am keeping gratitude journal as part of a coaching program I am in, and in one my entries, I said, "I am thankful for this wonderful community of Hubpages". We get to meet so many diverse cultures, and folks from different walks in life. Look at Princessa, and Theresa, they have lived in different parts of the world, been part of the culture, and you living in Spain with a gorgeous terrace filled with plants and flowers,is something I can enjoy vicariously.
And si, your hub gets a thumb up!
I couldn't agree with you more, Elena. We are not here to criticize anothers writing skills, not do I believe we have a responsibility to do so. Everyone would do well to remember that just because you don't like something, doesn't mean sombody else doesn't.
These were some of my thoughts just today Elena!
I'm torn. I don't want to leave sweet comments where they are not warranted. BUT, I want adoring comments left on my hubs. Must one prepay the piper?
I personally don't care too much about my score and I comment on what I enjoy and who I want to...I Love to get comments because I am being heard or at least thought about...It gets lonely when you are retired but not tired...and also alone...so I admit this is a lot of my entertainment these days....
I do learn a lot and laugh A LOT and even cry a lot...there are so many people here and I think many feel like me...
Well anyways a great hub as always my dear...and HAPPY EASTER G-Ma :O) Hugs
Nice take on this! I have really found myself having to pick and choose what to participate in. There is just SOOOOO much information, so many stories, so many articles, so many requests... the mind boggles. I try to read at least 2 or 3 articles a day, and I try to write at least one a day; although not always for Hub Pages. I am always astounded by other people's long, long articles turned out at a rate of 2 or 3 or even 4 a day. I'm a fast typist, but I can't imagine having the time for it! And then there are the three-five hundred word comments! Amazing!
Thanks for your thoughts, everyone. I'm gratified that you shared them, NO pun or irony intended :-)
Pam – I've been "following" your "self questioning" regarding HubPages and while I'll admit I'm a bit disappointed just by the thought that you may take your writing elsewhere, I can't but encourage you to go elsewhere IF this medium does the things it does to your stuff. I can always goggle you :-)
Being honest without being nasty is a true art. What VioletSun said in her comment, "if you don’t have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all", I'm not entirely in agreement, constructive feedback is good, and actually a very generous act, but I think it requires that one has a personal interest in the "target" of the feedback - which I find I lack in many cases around here. Hence, discretion may indeed be the better part of valor :-)
Using your car analogy, a computer and an internet connection bring on just the same kind of false courage, with an added component: some people just don't seem to realize that words can be as harmful as a Hammer running you over. Even more to the point and what prompted this hub: one may have to post insincere feedback in order to get any kind of feedback in return. I just realized, it's really not for me :-)
Aevans – There are all sorts of people here, just as in any community online or offline. My point is, it seems that in order to be gratified 'round here, one must pay the piper in a way. You either adore, or don't get adored back. I don't mind adoring the "adorable" writers, I'm just a bit tired of adoring every single person, when I know I'm just putting up an act :-)
VioletSun – This will sound silly, but I am titillated that you (and others) live vicariously though the photos I've been posting :-) That part of the mutual gratification is quite fulfilling, it's "The Good" and makes it worth my time any day and keeps me engaged. Maybe I should have made The Good part of this hub a bit longer!
I indirectly answered your comment when I replied to Pam :-) I'm getting to agree that discretion maybe the better part of valor in this medium, I'll rather stay quiet than be insincere, even at the expense that I'll get totally ignored and my personal gratification will go out the window, initially. I'm counting that it'll pick up again real pronto, when I don't have to count on feedback and can be just gratified by posting here at all :-)
Christoph – You're right, of course. I'm trying to get that tattooed to my right hand so that I don't forget it again :-) And, if the price to be paid for not saying anything is that you get ignored then I'm ready to pay that particular piper.
Well, Randy, I just used that same expression up before your comment. Yes, personally I think "paying the piper" is part of the game. Then again you may try NOT paying the piper. I'm certainly going to try, and let's what happens :-)
G-MA – Happy (rainy) Easter to you! Don't eat too many choco eggs now! :-) I understand that this place can generate companionship and the feeling one is not alone, that's really nice and I think we all get a bit addicted to it, it just doesn't mean one has to be insincere and praise people that's not really interesting to us, only to get treated kindly in return. Why would I want to be treated kindly by someone I'm not really interested in? I would never do that in real life, so why here?
Suzanne – Thank you. So you also have to sort through it, eh? Kinda cool to know I'm not alone :-) You mention one thing that I dearly avoided, but since the cat's outta the bag.... Laugh! On lengthy comments, I could write another hub. Not *all* lenghty comments, sometimes they add value to the content, but sometimes I get the feeling if one's got so much to say about something, wouldn't it be smart to write their own article about it? But, to each their own, I guess :-)
Elena: Re, your comment to me in your reply to Pam, I agree constructive criticism can be useful, but I only offer it if asked, or if I know the person for years. I have a friend who is very negative, and has a poor me whiny, mentality, and I am always after her to learn to look at life with a more empowered approach. However, I use tact when communicating with her and understand no one changes unless they want to. Will you believe, one of my friends told me about 25 years ago, that I was too blunt, and harsh, but since I was a sincere friend, she stuck by my friendship even if I made her angry at times. She is still my friend nowadays... this is how I was years ago, volatile and blunt, (and I wince at how ugly I could be with my harshness, yikes) I have mellowed as I have grown, and learned diplomacy or keeping my mouth shut, works much better for me, but we all are unique, so whatever works for each one! :)
Hello VioletSun, I think you're right that the trust with someone you've known for years facilitates providing feedback. I think the reason is, when you've known someone long there are a lot less chances that your feedback will be misunderstood, taken the "wrong way", like you're being a b*tch as opposed to genuinely wanting to help.
This story with your friend, I have to smile :-) In the long run, I think sincerity pays, but you're right, one doesn't need to be harsh in order to be sincere :-)
I just dropped in to see what's the email about *wink* So apparently we're not done yet? I am not one to grandstand and besides I have said my piece in my notoriously hateful hate hub: But allow me this one thought. I have realized that people sometimes say what they don't mean. And mean what they don't say.
So there. Great hub! I'm off again :D
All right, Cris, buh bye then! Laugh! Oh, just as clarification: I would allow you any thoughts you'd wish to share! I can't recall that I've said what I don't mean here at HP, but I KNOW for a fact that I've said a lot more than I should have, had I been honest with myself ;-)
mi amiga, of course I know that you'd allow me to say anything. heck, I can even make a new hub with this comment but i'm done hubbing now for the meantime. By the way, hipocrisy is easy specially when it doesn't have a face. Now can I go back to swimming with the dolphins?! (none of them is named flipper! doesn't life suck?!)
con carino, Cris A
Is that a new Avatar Elena? Looks vaguely familiar... just can't place it though. ;)
I noticed the same thing Randy....almost twins...sisters?? Thinking about an avatar showing my stuff...whaddaya think?
This hub of yours got some great responses, as usual Eleni =D
I have to say I totally agree with R.Blue's first comment. Nicely put R.Blue.
--
I have to admit my love of being in the first five pages of hothubs, and I love loads and loads of comments (meaningful heartfelt ones especially), and of course I love a good hub or hubber score that stays fairly consistent.
On my blogs I love to see the follower or rss feed counts rise, slowly but surely. I love to hear a bit here and there from readers. I don't expect as much "instant gratification" with those as much as I do for my hubs, simply because the community of those is not as tightly knit.
On twitter, I have come to expect the certain times of day my favorite twitterers will twit, the ones with the best and most interesting article tweets. I can instantly gratify them by re-tweeting their tweets, and instantly gratify myself in return because I have just shown my gratification by re-tweeting, I've shared what they took the time to tweet to those outside their group of followers. Just like hubpages, I know who's tweets I trust to click on with the possibility of finding a gem, many gems most times. I also miss some because of time constraints or the fact that if someone has disappointed me with their tweets too often, I tend to overlook them in lieu of other more reliable twitterers; unfair, perhaps, but true.
I'm not a major commenter. The feeling either strikes me or doesn't. I love to read and read more than I write, that's for sure. I fan or follow if I'm impressed. I thumbs up when I'm please with content and form on hub pages. I often wish other sites used the same system, because even if I have no immediate comment, I may just want to somehow let the post and poster know I dig their stuff. Twitter gives an in your face gratification in this regard, and is perhaps the nicest for instant gratification needers, via others and yourself, by using re-tweet.
And then there's facebook. Encompasser of instant gratification; both in the need to instantly share as well as in the need to recieve commeradery and information from others. You can see if some one liked what you posted or did, and who that person was. You can tag, tell, do, post, just about anything and be gratified within a day, or within an hour. These are your friends. Friends from the beginning. There are no scores to worry about. There's no competition. You can come and go and people know you'll always be there. You don't have to lie or be hypocritical. You don't get forgotten when you don't post or show up for a while.
--'k finished hub LOL. Sorry. =D
Randy, yeah, now that you mention it. Where on earth have I seen a similar avatar before?! Laugh! I'll go back to Ms Blue come Monday and you'll be back to being the one and only sassy hips around! :-*
R Blue, go for it. Make sure you're wearing jeans. They seem to be quite the popular attire around here :-)
I don't mind sharing the spotlight with you Elena.
I absolutely loved this. You made your point so well. And its so true! We are not on here to critique each other or point out mistakes or to bash each other. We are on here for positivity. I always enjoy your hubs!!!
Frieda, interesting comparison between the different communities. You know I am familiar with FB, but have now clue whatsoever about Twitter. I think any system that has a rating mechanism has the potential to become a "trap", the original intention of being connected and sharing stuff can become an "I'll show you mine if you show me yours" kind of setup :-) That's my opinion only, and I'm free to walk out any time I wish. I just find it a bit frustrating, a bit more high school drama than I care about.
That is not to say these communities aren't totally engaging and addictive, precisely because the connection to others is so immediate and so in your face, as you put it. I'm just gonna try and use the system in a way that doesn't make me feel "trapped" and where gratification doesn't come from showing you mine if you show me yours, in a manner of speaking :-) We'll see how it goes :-)
I'm sure you don't, Randy! :-) But a weekend of spotlight may be all I can bear with grace and style, I don't think I can pull it off for longer than that :-)
jjrubio, merci madame! Enjoying stuff around here is going to be my purpose! If anyone likes my stuff, too, coolio for me, but I'm not going to make that my aim in life anymore! Laugh!
I want to go for drinks with some of these guys, you included Elena. Likely to be in Murcia some time next year, wanna catch up?
I look forward to the gratification thing. I start feeling less than when I go below 90, it's a self worth thing! LOL. One thing I've felt strongly is the drive to raise my own level of writing because of the high calibre of talent here. That can only be a good thing as I'm not 'trained.' What's apparent though is my first 5 hubs were my best and I wasn't expecting gratification. So doesn't look like I've learnt a thing.
Jewels, it seems to me you HAVE learned, at any rate let me tell you what I learned with your comment:
- Your first 5 hubs were your best
- You weren't expecting gratification
- Ergo, what you do for yourself and not for the audience is BETTER than what you do to put up a show, to belong and to worry about ratings.
That was just my reading there, but worth a thought, isn't it? Anyhow, not likely that I'll hop down to Murcia any time soon, but if you hop up to Madrid, then that'd be a different story :-)
Thanks Elena for the compliment. Good to refocus on what's important.
Love the banter and some great people I've met here.
Madrid - If Ireland gets too wet I may surprise you.
When you going to Ireland? I'll be there again in 2 weeks :-)
Probably not til next year. I'm procrastinating!! Will be living near Millstreet in County Cork.
Looking at a 5 year visa. Decisions decisions.
You bring up some very important points! In the end, it seems that online is like the outdoors, where the strongest survive and prosper...
Interesting screen name, roastedpinebark :-) Yeah, it would appear that way. I realized I just don't like much the "competition to stay on top" of the pile, especially because for me it tends to imply being a way I'd never be "in the outdoors".
Hi Elena - when I joined Hub pages I didn't really know what it was about, frankly I was looking for a place where I could write and increase my Adsense earnings. I was prepared to be very active in the forums for the sole purpose of getting my name out there. Instant gratification was not on my mind.
THEN I published my first hub and CrisA read it and became a fan - his Comment and attachment to me (even though now he can't work out whether he loves me or hates me) was both very welcoming and very gratifying.
I wrote a few more hubs and gained a few more fans, I reciprocated by joining the fan club of each person who joined mine or left comments. I have slowly and carefully built a fan base of people that I want to read. I'm also fairly selective about what I read and comment upon - this is, in part, time management.
NOW, 3 months down the line, the adsense is way down the list of why the first thing I do each morning is open up Hub Pages. I just like it here - and that is gratifying in itself. Someone else said elsewhere that HubPages is like a favourite bar where friends hang out and whenever you pop in there's always somebody around. Can't beat that for instant gratification !
i don't know about instant gratification, i mean the best hubbers obviously take some time with their hub, research and write the article, find appropriate images and spend a hell of a lot of time reading and commenting on other people's stuff...i wouldn't mind a bit of constructive critisism, that can be helpful, it gets almost wierd, all the niceness, but hey, one could write the great american novel...work for years...and find that nobody wants it and it was all for nothing except a sort of intellectual masturbation
Dolores, don't expect constructive criticism around here. If people find fault with your writing, they won't stay long enough to tell you so. Therefore NICE is all ya get. Sorry...NOT! :}
So it's back to Blue Screen on Monday. Drats! Gettin' kinda used to sassy, even if you and Randy Behavior picked your avatars out of the same closet. Like yours better. (Nothing personal, RB!)
Iphigenia, it seems the HubPages feeling just happens. We're not the first, and I sure we won't be the last :-) Time is one of the factors that got me going with all this. I wasn't really available to come online and all of a sudden I though, hey, I don't have that chore fo reading stuff today. It sounds rather nasty, if I say it just like that, but it's what woke me the heck up. The rest is pretty much up there on the hub.
I agree that this is a very friendly place, but well, I don't have to like all I read around here, and better -- I don't have to pretend that I do :-) I'm sure and certain that I'll be paid in kind, but oh well. Now go one and give me another chocolate overdose -- THAT I always like to click on! Laugh!
Dolores, Jama got here ahead of me. Was gonna say, unless you have real friends around here, I'm not sure many will stop and talk to you constuctively or otherwise if they aren't gripped by what you're posting. I can think of two hubbers that would do that, though. Two among all I know, anyway. Under that light, I have decided to just do my stuff and if somebody cares to say something, then thanks. If not, tought.
Jama, so I'm one-upping RB with the avatar? Gotta take that as huge compliment! Nothing personal at all, Randy, you know I personally dig yours! Laugh. Ms Blue will be back, yes. Gotta put up a professional front during the work week. Ahem. Sassy me will be stored in the weekend special collection, if you're so inclined as to take a peek during the week! :-)
superb hub really fantastic
can i digg you http://www.Dekholive.com
Hi Elena
I don't get easily gratified, I like working for it. Instant gratification seems holllow, a passing fancy if you may. But to each his own :) Great hub all over!!!
nabablucknow - I wish I knew what you mean with that comment. You can Digg me... if it doesn't involve anything illegal! Laugh!
The Lonely Hubber - It's hard to find someone who likes to work for gratification nowadays, I'm glad you left a comment to prove that such a concept still exists in today's wired world!
This was a great read, but as always it is the comments that really get my attention. I love reading the articles but I love the "people watching" of the comments. Article show some insite into the minds of the Hubbers, but the comments are where you can get to know every one. Writing has been the greatest fun, hearing someone say they like it gives me the same ego boost every one else gets, but the friends I make in these diffrent online communities are the real reward.
I understand constructive critisisim helps people do better, but I'm with VioletSun on "if you don't have anything nice to say..." There are so many people on here that there are plenty of chance to rave about hubs you really enjoy with out needing to comment on or get involved with the ones that are not to our tastes. I can find good in everything, even if it is respect for the courage it takes to put your writing out for everyone to see. I will always find something good to say and mean it.
I know I get so busy sometimes I feel overwhelmed wanting to read a new post from a new found frien, or take the time to comment and give encouragement, so I always understand if I am feeling a bit neglected that all the other hubbers have lives too.
Great topic, thanks, No you don't have to come to my page and comment, I'll still be a fan. No honor bound feeling needed, just write and enjoy all the friendship!
Hello you dating specialist, you :-) I've been following up on filling out the profile, having it completed and what happens after .. I can't but wish you the best of luck in your quest! :-)
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this -- you mention something that I don't think came up before here: respect for the courage it takes to put your writing out for everyone to see. I think respect is implicitly there for most if not all of us, it needs to be part of any community for it to keep rolling, but again, respect wouldn't necessarily imply reciprocity or paying any piper. Oh well :-) my life is a lot simpler since I took the pressure of myself to do the hubpages homework.
Hello Elena. I finally got around to reading this, and I have to say it is excellent. There are so many times when it is hard to decide whether or not to leave a comment, and then, what kind of comment. What is appropriate? What is needed? What is helpful? Maybe I make it too complicated, but to be anything other than honest is to cheat myself and the person receiving the comment. To make it anything other than sincere is to be a fraud.
Hey, Christa! I don't think you make it too complicated, I think it IS that complicated! Honesty, I have decided, is the best medicine for me --and a few times that means not only not commenting, but simply not reading. Thanks for your opinion!
Feline Prophet says:
9 months ago
Ah but Elena...isn't it gratifying to get an instant comment? :P
Just kidding, but you've put into words, and very honestly, something I often think about. There is a certain amount of forced bonhomie on online forums...as if people are honour bound to be nice so that they are treated well in return. I guess in time one learns to get discriminating, and bold enough to reject what one doesn't really like.