Instructions for new parents

Five years ago my son Sam was born. I can clearly remember this moment of joy when he looked into my eyes and smiled with that toothless grin. Sure, it was one of the greatest joys in life, but as I was holding onto the little one I can remember thinking to myself...Hmm. Now what? What's the next step?

The kind that would tell you exactly what personality you are getting, what foods the child will eat, why he is crying, or what times he will go to sleep? Well, unfortunately God didn't decide to give us such luxury but here are some useful parenting lessons that I learned along the way that hopefully may help you as you raise your child.

When my wife was in the recovery room, the nurse would come by and see my son crying. She said he would need his diaper changed, then she left. I was a bit shocked when she left as I thought the nurse would immediately come to our rescue and change the diaper for us. I guess I was very afraid of the very first diaper change. I don't know what it is but I guess men can sympathize with me, diaper changing is one helluva interesting experience. The baby was so frail and I just didn't know how to handle this tiny human being vying for help. Be at peace my friend, you will get much more experience and soon you will pretending the like it's a basketball game and you have 24 seconds to change the diaper. You will become a pro and you'll have that diaper poo wadded up into a ball and thrown into the trash. Yes after 12 squirtings in your face and nausea from the aromatic poo poo you will become a professional. Anyways, why am I telling you all this? I just want to ameliorate your fears since it's gonna be a long journey for you and the litte one. Take it in stride, it's what all parents have to go through.

Most of the time the baby will cry if he is hungry, uncomfortable, or just wants to cuddle. If he cries a soft "wahh" that means he wants to cuddle, a "wahh WAHHH" means he is hungry, a "Wahhhhhhhh weeee weeee" means he peed in his diapers. Got it? Ok, I really hope you did not belive that. This is a hard one but one that you will master as time goes by. If he just ate, and he cries, you know he must be uncomfortable; he must have peed or popped. If he still cries and he is not hungry or wet, then check the room temperature. Some mothers have a tendency to overdress their babies. See if taking a bit of clothes helps out. If the baby STILL cries, try a pacifier. If the baby cries very frequently, and specially after feedings, you may have a colicky baby. This means there is some discomfort in his stomach or intestines. Try to make him burp if you can. There are many different techniques for this. If the over the shoulder, tap his back technique doesn't work then try other techniques. Still no success? Then try Gripe Water. Gripe water is a remedy found in most baby stores that helps to ease stomach discomforts. It may help them pass gas or burp if that is their need. Although it's not as well known in the United States, it's a wonderful remedy in other parts of the world. Most of the time it's made of natural ingredients, so you know it's ok for your baby. Some mothers swear by it! I've had great results with my own child as well. He still uses it as a toddler. You can get gripe water from many places. I get some from my local Whole Foods and it costs about $12 but you can also get it cheaper from Amazon or websites like BabyUniverse. Check to see if there are any babyuniverse coupons first so you can pile on the savings.

If this is your first child, realize your relationship with your husband or wife will be affected. When you start caring for an individual 24/7 and the baby starts crying, it's definitely going to affect both of you. Realize that the other person is just as stressed as you are. Understand that you may have a few more fights because you may not agree on caring for the child the same way. You may fight over things such as giving the baby the pacifier, feeding him too much, feeding him too little, making him wear too much clothing, and so on. You need to understand that you can't go back to the state before the baby now. If you understand this new schema, you will be able to comprehend your new role in the family better.

As I mentioned throughout this page, you may become very stressed. It is very important to take some time out for yourself. It is instinctive that you may want to take care of the newborn 24/7 but you may be burnt out even though you may not realize it. Try to find a loving and caring relative to take care of your newborn while you go out once a week. When you go out don't stress over the child, do something you like, something that will help you take your mind off the baby. It may be as simple as getting some sleep or getting a Netflix movie and watching it. You will see that when you go back to your parental duties, you will be more refreshed and focused. If you don't know anybody to help take care of your infant then rotate with your significant other.

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Perhaps the most important lesson that you will apply, not only as an infant but throughout the child's life, is showing them love. When you get into fights with your significant other, please remember the child and don't fight. When the child grows older and you need to scold them, tell them what they did wrong and then tell them you love them. Be there for all the baseball games, auditions, ballets where they feel they need you. I have a friend who is a psychologist and he always tells me most of the children whom he has encountered to have autistic like symptoms were due to parents who neglected their children.

I hope you enjoyed my new parent instruction manual. Feel free to add your own instructions. Just make sure you add lots of love.