The blind date, we've all had one, haven't we? That's the new normal, I think. The Internet is a good tool to use if you are looking for a blind date. There are many sites on the WWW that you can utilize to find a "match". For me, it was always easier to date people I had no former ties with. I found it easier to be myself. I discovered that when I dated people I had known for a while, I was using what I knew of them to mold myself into something I thought they would like, more of what they expected instead of who I really was. That all goes back to my OCD personality, always having to be liked and fit in... but that's a different hub.

THE STORY BEGINS

I was talking with a friend the other night and we were swapping blind date stories. I thought I had a bad one to share, but my friend's experience took the cake. After hearing her story, I was ok with my date being four hours late for a movie and then taking me mattress shopping (it's not what you think, we really went mattress shopping). Now, my friend is a little weird, not in a bad way, in the best way weird can be. She is also wayyyy fun to hang out with, very kind and easy going. So, when she started her story by telling me he was a total weirdo, I figured she wasn't just throwing words around. I've known her to let other people's "weird" roll off her back. She told me the situation began on the Internet on a "meet me" site called Tagged, one where you can send gifts, winks, show love and message. They talked for a few days, found out a little about one another and decided to meet. My friend is a smart girl, so she made plans to meet in a public place and others knew where she was going and she had important people on stand by in case things turned ugly.

THE MEETING

They met in a busy department store parking lot, she knew what he was driving, so when he pulled up next to her she got butterflies. They both stepped out of their vehicles and walked toward one another. He said to her " your pictures don't do you justice, you are so much prettier in person". Sweet right? Well... he looked nothing like his pictures either, she said she thought to herself... you told me you were a big dude but you didn't tell me you were three big dudes. She isn't shallow, so she gave the date a chance.

THE BOOPING

They talked for a while and decided to go for a ride in his truck and see the sites. At first it was cool, they rode and talked, then the conversation was interjected with uncomfortable silence followed by "booping". I had to ask, WTF is booping? She explained that his finger would spontaneously yet frequently move from his area of the truck and float toward her vicinity of the vehicle in a circular motion, finally landing on her leg with a loud boop he added as commentary. The booping traveled from her leg to her tummy, then to her shoulder and finally she stopped the boops at her face. Too much booping is too much booping she explained. I can understand. I don't think I've ever been booped before, but I'm not sure I would like it.

THE KISS

They stopped their ride for a bit, again in a public place, and he said to her " I came all this way to see you, Do I get a kiss?" Although, the chore wasn't on the top of her "to do list", she thought one little peck wouldn't hurt. So she leaned in slowly and was quickly pulled in by two enormous hands, one on each ear. So I asked her sarcastically, "it wasn't a nice kiss?" She then told me he must be really good at his job. I asked what his profession was, She replied with "he's an EMT, I thought I was being intubated. I couldn't breathe and something was going straight down my throat... I was stunned. Like a deer in headlights, I didn't know which way to go."

SMOKE BREAK

After that kiss, she needed a break from the vehicle. She stepped out for a smoke, which was a good idea because it was a cold night and he didn't smoke, so she figured it would give her a minute to think of a way to end the date as painlessly as possible. Midway through her cigarette, He rolls down the window and tells her it is warm in the truck. So she gathered her composure and proceeded back to tell him in the nicest way that the date was over.

WHAT'S THAT SMELL?

She put out her cigarette as she opened the door, got in, sat down and started to speak. She was interrupted by a ridiculously foul odor. She turned her head and saw he had unzipped his pants and let his "little friend" out to play... she couldn't help herself. She uncontrollably said to him, "did you come directly from work to see me without showering???" She decided mid-sentence she had way too much excitement for the night and didn't want to see what kind of games his little friend had in store. So as she was opening the door, she said nice to meet you but please don't call me again... EVER.

THE LONG WALK

Embarassed by the whole thing, and about four miles from her own vehicle, she decided to walk instead of calling a friend for a ride. The long walk gave her some time to "think about what she had done". So, she tells me now that she will NEVER go on another blind date, internet inspired or otherwise. I can't blame her.

Internet dating isn't for everyone... but really, is it for anybody? I think I would like to hear some good stories of internet/blind dating, but I'm not sure I would be as entertained by them as I was with this one. LOL :)