Sometimes we don't see all the classic signs, and some of the signs are less typical than others. In the end, we have to trust our gut.

Without getting into too much detail, I will list some things that I began to notice right away, as well as some things that became clearer in hindsight. I've also added lots of others that I've heard from fellow betrayed spouses.

Note that one or even many of these signs don't necessarily add up to a cheating spouse. You will have to use your own intuition and snooping skills to get to the bottom of it.

1. Working Later Hours

2. Less attentive to family matters

3. Chores around the house neglected.

4. Simple questions that turned into arguments with no real provocation.

5. Secrecy with certain phone calls. Look for whispering, quick hang ups if you enter room. Sometimes that phone will go with them into the bathroom, etc.

6. Clothes showing up in the laundry, that you have never seen. and YOU are the only one that buys the socks and underwear!

7. Gifts, gifts and more gifts. (guilt gifts)

8. New tricks in the bedroom. ( they want to try them out on you, so they can try it out on someone else later)

9. Less sex, and less intimate. ( may feel they are cheating on affair partner)

10. MORE sex. Way more than the norm.(may feel guilt, or want to throw you off)

11. Reciepts that make no sense. (I found one to a car parts store, for a car we didn't even own. It was the other woman's.)

12. Strange numbers on cell phone bills. There are LOTS of ways to find out who a number belongs to, even cell phone numbers.

13. Picking a fight, so they can storm off; usually as an excuse to see/call lover.

14. Insisting they help with the laundry, especially if they don't usually do it.

15. Unusual texts on cell phone. Check for strange hours of the day.

16. The spouse takes a trip to the store and is not only gone much longer than they should be, but comes back empty-handed.

17. Taking long walks, when they usually wouldn't. Oftentimes, those walks are a chance to get away from the family to call their lover. Note if they are consistent with certain times.

18. Changes in appearance. New haircut, new clothing, new underwear, new cologne or perfume.

19. Caring more about their bodies, i.e. working out more, losing weight, eating better.

20. Online, do they close a window when you walk into the room?

21. Unexplained cash withdrawals, It helps eliminate a paper trail.

22. He/she is just a friend of mine! If they are just friends, they should also be YOUR friend as well.

23. He/she doesn't like car seats, toys and kid things in their car.

24. They leave home in a good mood and come back sullen.

25. Leaving their cell phone in thier car. Leaving it on vibrate when around you. Guarding it like it was their life support, never letting it out of their sight.

26. You notice that when you sit in the passenger side seat, it isn't the setting you left it at.

27. They sleep on the couch more.

28. They start accusing YOU of cheating.

29. Your mutual friends start to act a little strange around you.

30. They start having an interest in music they don't normally listen to. (I found lyrics from country songs on his computer. He is a metal head.)

31. "I love you but I'm not IN love with you" speech.

32. YOUR GUT! If you are reading these signs, it's because your gut has already started worrying. LISTEN to it!

I'll write more about snooping, catching cheaters, and other things that every betrayed spouse should know.