Yes, I am a fan of Chelsea Lately. I admit it. I only recently discovered her one late night when my husband was out of town, and I was instantly hooked! Chelsea is funny and quick-witted, and my TV late night idol. She and I even have a shared religion. She is half Mormon, half Jew and I am half Mormon, half clinically insane (on my mother's side). See? Similar.

Chelsea has the job I would love to have -- poking fun at celebrities. I would like to be the on-line equivalent and call myself "Karla Early." I would pattern my show after hers with a few, minor changes. First of all my show will have a PG rating. I love Chelsea, but she is definitely rated R, or at least TVMature. She had a "topless roundtable" and even though it was censored I still almost had to turn the channel. So, I won't be copying that, or the "three-way roundtable," which is surely soon to follow.

I do enjoy the roundtable format, with visiting comedians and guests who all take turns poking fun at Lindsey Lohan, and Britney Spears. If they're in OK or Us Weekly, the roundtable will talk about them. I often join in the roundtable discussion from my family room sofa. I have also observed that Angelina Jolie has way too many kids. Actually, my issue with Angelina Jolie (in addition to her stupid name), is that she's really, really, weird. She completely alters herself to fit with her current man. Now that she's with Brad Pitt she dresses elegantly, and is mother earth, with a bunch of good causes. When she was with Billy Bob Thorton she dressed like a biker chick, wore blood around her neck and was always swearing -- and not showering. And of course when she was with her brother, she dressed like a vampire, died her hair black, and ... well --- made out with her brother all the time! yuck. How come nobody remembers that? And she says that women hate her because she's beautiful. That's not it. Women hate her because she makes out with her brother!

I would also share my views (ugh the View! That's two words that send a chill down my spine! And not in the good way either) on Jessica Simpson and her managdad or whatever he calls himself ("thou shalt not lust" is what he should call himself) . He's a minister. A minister! When she first started he would talk about his religion, and her virginity, and then once she made it big, all he wants to talk about are her boobs! He's a little too good and putting that manager hat on -- and totally forgetting that there's a dad hat anywhere in the building! He's still her dad -- and a minister. I don't think he should be talking about her "double Ds." Ick. Was there are verse in the Bible about it being okay for fathers to lust after their daughters after the daughter is no longer a virgin? Or is it just okay because she's so hot?

I would also chat about Tom Cruise and his wife-hostage Katie, the incredibly high-voiced Beckhams, and all the rest of the zaney Hollywood gang. And don't forget politics too! Chelsea supports Obama as I do. And makes fun of Sara Palin, as is just and right. Although I can't understand Palin's celebrity status. And unlike most -- I don't think she's pretty. It's just in relation to most politicians (and most Alaskans). She's the prettiest VP candidate. Big deal. That's like saying you're the smartest Bush, or most literate Alabaman, or the least wife-beater at the trailer park. The sooner we all forget about Sara Palin the better!

But I digress -- back to Chelsea Lately! What (pause) a joy! A tip of the funny bone to you Ms. Handler! I would pattern my on-line show (and my life) after hers and would also have a guest interview. My fantasy guest would be Chelsea herself. I love her. Even with her potty-mouth I love her. And I would ask the questions that we are all wondering about Ms. Handler. Where did you grow up? What was your childhood like? Is your dad really such a "hot mess" or is that exaggerated? When's the next book? Can I make a mold of your face? You know, the usual stuff.

Anyway -- keep up the good work Chelsea! I will continue to fantasize that someday my show, Karla Early, will be available to fill those pesky day time hours with celebrity gossip and witty banter, while we are all waiting until 11:00 for you.