The time has come for me to put an end to the weekly emails making fun of my new home. However, I have decided to post my observations and thoughts on-line. So, whenever you have a chance, or need a laugh (hopefully there'll be a new posting here and it'll give you a chuckle.)

I will send all of you an email announcement when I do post to this site... so don't worry -- this isn't the last you'll hear from me.

So here's the latest:

1. Halloween was a real treat. I had some really cute trick-or-treaters and then I had people drive up to my house, get out of their car in regular street clothes wanting free candy. For fear of getting robbed, I gave them the candy. Next year though, if you're not in a costume, I'll drop a fried pickle in that plastic Wal-Mart bag you're holding and send you, and the rest of your family waitinng in the car, on your way!

2. The weather here changes as fast as the time in the lower right corner of my monitor. It can go from rainy, to foggy, to sunny, to 'extremely' windy, to cold, to warm, to freezing -- all within one hour.

3. I didn't think Sadcliff could get much worse or be more boring -- then my husband went out of town for a week. I've walked the dog so much out of sheer boredom that I've dropped two dress sizes. When I take out the leash, she now runs away from me and 'hides' behind the bar stool in the kitchen. She's an 80 pound Rottweiler...she can't hide anywhere. Well, make that 75 pounds (we've been walking A LOT!)

4. I went out of town last week and came back to realize that I missed the free John Deer Sweatshirt, t-shirt, jacket and baseball cap giveaway. Everywhere I turned, I saw these items being worn by our beatiful Hardin County residents.

5. Either my husband gained weight, or a Large in Kentucky is what a Small/Medium is to the rest of the civilized world. None of the sweaters I purchased at the mall fit. And he's worn a Large for his entire adult life.

6. There are actually more than 3 radio stations here, but they each play the same 5 songs. Why not just have 1 radio station? Why tease me by giving me the option to change the channel when Fergie's "London Bridge" comes on, just to hear it there too?

7. Speaking of that song, "How come everytime I come around, my car gets pooped on by the large flocks of birds that continuously circle my neighborhood?

8. I thought lady bugs were cute until last weekend. As the locals will tell ya, "Every Fall, they come out. Kain't do nuthin' to stop em." Those nasty things were all over the house, coming in through the tiniest cracks in my front door and door to the deck. The builder should be here tomorrow to put thicker seals around the doors.

9. I am still seeing alot of really tight curly perms. It's making me crazy. Can I get an embargo on perm solution coming in to Kentucky? I desperately need a haircut, but I'm so scared of going to a salon to see a bunch of women getting their hair permed and frosted...yes, I said FROSTED.

10. Police officers here all seem to resemble John Goodman.

11. We probably have the cleanest restaurants in the country. In the Sunday paper, there are always write ups about restaurant health inspections and how they scored, what needed to be corrected, etc. The nice thing about small towns is that there's only a few places to go (god, did I just say that was 'nice'?) I've been here 2 months, too long. Sorry, folks that totally wrecked my train of thought. Not sure where I was going with that... It's nice that there's no where to go? What?

Ok, so before I close - thank you for the Soft Philly Pretzels and D&D Coffee to make while I'm home. And, the Gift Certificates to D&D that I'll surely use once I'm back amongst the stressed out, cranky, over-caffeinated, under paid, out of time, rush-rush-rush, Yankees that I miss so much right now!

Y'Ouze be good. And Fuggedaboutit.