I've met heaps of dogs over the years. I've been bitten and smothered with love. I've had good dogs, bad dogs, and really bad dogs that I couldn't help loving.

My current dog love is my Juliet - a yellow lab who captured my heart at first sight and is at the moment, sitting at my feet under my desk. I've known smart dogs, smarter than people dogs, but Juliet is not one of them.

Still, I have learned some very valuable lessons from this simple minded pup who lives and loves in my home. She is a treasure. A 90 pound lap sitting treasure. We, of course, think she is the best dog ever (even if she can't retrieve a stick like a retriever should), and she judges us to be better, perhaps, than we truly are.

"You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you this look that says, `My God, you're RIGHT! I NEVER would've thought of that!'" - Dave Barry

1. If you smile and wag your tail at everyone you meet, at least one in ten times you will end up in a dangerous situation.
2. You can officially be on a diet for years and never lose a pound if you continue to eat everything you can get your paws on.
3. If no one saw you eat it, it doesn't count.
4. Burying something does not make it go away. It resurfaces eventually.

5. A sweet disposition can cover a multitude of faults.
6. Taking a vacation is not the same for everyone.
7. You can never be too loyal, too loving or too happy.
8. Some people and dogs are not nice, even when you are.
9. Stay as close as possible to toddlers and children. You never know what they may be hiding.
10. Never leave the kitchen when the something is cooking.
11. Be quick to forgive if someone scolds you for getting mud on the new couch, stealing their donut or knocking them over in excitement.
12. Its okay for a toddler to examine your teeth, and ears, pull your tail and climb all over you. They will out grow it soon enough and then they will hardly notice you at all. And you will miss it.
13. It really is okay to get excited when the UPS truck pulls in the driveway. There could be something in that box for you.
14. When the man of the house comes home after a long day at work, he appreciates being tackled affectionately at the front door.
15. An ability to love unconditionally is the greatest gift you can give your family.
16. Exercise is overrated.

All this from a dog who has been spotted in a tutu, been saddled up and ridden by her "sisters," and bounced happily in to the animal control van.

She has yet to meet her Romeo, but she does hang out with an enormous Newfoundland down the block.