The world and relationships today are fraught with chaos, from where I stand. I truly miss the sense of wonder I had as a child. I don't remember it leaving, I think it was kind of whittled away throughout my life. But I wish I was still that naive. People are going crazy. There is talk of the world ending in a very short time (2012). According to some sources, the planets are all going to align, the poles are going to shift, and the world will suffer days of darkness. The gung-ho North Koreans want to wipe the US off the planet. So does much of the rest of the world, sick of watching our country stick its nose in where it doesn't belong. We spend a lot of time defending the underdog and not enough time taking care of our own problems right here at home. Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett and a family friend all died yesterday.

Every time I turn on the TV or the computer, I am inundated with depressing headlines. Not to mention the state of my marriage which is mentioned in depth in my other articles. After two years of Al-Anon for my husband's drinking problem, I finally learned that there are just some things I cannot control. One of my sponsors would always say the same thing to me when I would call her upset about some situation. "Laura," she would say, "get out your pen and make a gratitude list." So that is always my first step in bringing myself up from depression.

A gratitude list just kind of gives you a better frame of reference as to what you have going for you that may not be apparent in the face of the current crisis. My gratitude list today reads:

1. I am grateful that I am close to all of my children, and that they all live with me.

2. I am grateful for the extended family I have that always wants to be near me, and I am grateful to have friends.

3. I am grateful that I am able to get out of bed every morning.

4. I am grateful that I have been feeling better physically since I left my husband.

5. I am thankful that I have intelligence and common sense, usually.

6. I am thankful that people appreciate what I have to say.

7. I am thankful that we always have enough food to eat.

8. I am thankful that we always get the money to pay the bills.

9. I am thankful that I always have time to spend with my children, and that my husband and I, even though we are not together OR getting along, were able to come to an arrangement regarding visitation.

10. I am thankful that the children have medical insurance.

11. I am thankful that I found the house I am living in with my children. It is perfect for us in so many ways.

12. I am thankful to be meeting nice, friendly people in the world.

13. I am thankful that my children and I have clothes to wear.

14. I am thankful that I have a lot more friends than I thought I did before leaving.

Anyways, you get the idea. Expressing appreciation for the good things in your life invites those things to stay and gives you a different view than you see through the depression lens. People don't realize how good they have it until they start doing this type of thing. A list of goals is usually my next step. And comparing your life to someone else's is never a healthy practice. Your life is your life. Other people have a different purpose than you do. Although you may see something in their life that you desire, you should be happy that they have the money, ability, lover, spouse, or whatever it is that they have that you want. If you spend too much time looking sideways (at the friend next to you), you don't see what is right in front of you. Be happy for them. Besides, they're not satisfied either, usually. Allow yourself to feel only positive emotion. Move away from anything that brings you anything else. Distance yourself from negative people. It is a choice between being bitter and being happy. You choose,

Many times, people think they have no control over the circumstances surrounding their current condition. Granted, there are situations that are just going to be depressing no matter how you cut it. But I am talking about daily ups and downs, the regularly occurring trends. I remember a song that said something like "ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife." Well, I can't tell you how many times I have spread mayonnaise with a spoon with a good attitude. At least I had the spoon. There are so many times we have to improvise in life, that we just have to find a way to make lemonade out of lemons.

Losing a job or relationship just makes room for the next good thing coming into our lives. One door closes and another door opens. Easy come, easy go. Sometimes our bad attitude prevents the other door from opening. It is a concentrated effort to turn a negative into a positive.

I watched that movie with Adam Sandler, "Bedtime Story," last night with my kids. It seemed to me to be almost a parody about the law of attraction. It is a must see. Sometimes we think we know what we want in life. We ask for it, and it isn't always what we expect. It may have some characteristics of what we expected, but it doesn't fulfill us the way we expected it to. Sometimes we have to just go with the flow of life and stop trying to force things and bend people and things to our will. If we are always like the salmon, swimming upstream, we will miss out on those things that are spontaneously enjoyable. Those are the best things in life. That is where bliss is.