One thing is for sure, dating in the heterosexual world has some traditional "rules" that make dating easier: The guy asks the girl out. The guy pays.

Of course, as with all things, some changes did come to pass in the hetero-dating scene. In the 90's "going dutch" became a more standard practice. This is, however, considered quite stingy when in a romantic situation. Following in the theory that the man is the “bread winner”, for him to suggest that she put in her share, doesn’t exactly prove his capabilities in this respect.

Ok, so that's what our heterosexual counterparts do, but what happens in a situation when we’re talking about two women?

There are, actually, two answers here. If you are talking about dating within the butch-femme community, it is likely that the butch would want to take care of the bill. A butch lesbian tends to step into the traditional male role more often than not and it is usually considered chivalrous to pick up the tab when escorting hyr lady out on the town.

Being in a butch-femme relationship myself, I find that the gallantry of a well-mannered butch is quite thrilling. Acts such as opening the door for me, allowing me to enter an establishment first with a bit of guidance from a hand on the small of my back, ordering for me and picking up the check are all part and parcel of treating me like a lady. A butch will typically seek the opportunity to treat hyr date in such a way. I spoke to a few lesbians and Monica of myspace.com/femtasticone said, “I think the butch should pay. In a femme-femme situation, I think they should alternate who pays but on the first date whoever asked should pay."

That said, it is likely that that the butch initiated the date to begin with, which brings us to the second answer to the “who pays?” question: The person who pays is the person who asked. According to Katie of lacikati.blog-city.com: “I think the one who asks the other person out, if it is in the hope of a future date. If friends then it should be dutch.” Katerina of katpop.blogspot.com concurs, “I think the person who "asked" the other person out should pay”.

Of course, as with anything, one should just use their common sense. You don’t go to a birthday party without a gift. You don’t go to a wedding with out ponying up some money. And you definitely don’t ask someone out on a date then expect them to pay for it. You brought them out of the house, after all.