Thanks to the Hubmob Team for bringing the Topic of Domestic Violence to the forefront at this time. Domestic violence or really "Domestic Terrorism".

One does not want to blame the victim, however, I have always wanted to try to understand what attracts a person to someone who would eventually abuse and murder them. This "love" to death syndrome has many well known examples, some very tragic and heinous and well publicized cases.

What kind of love that turns to such hate that results in the murder of that which was cherished?

What causes someone to fall in love with their murderer? I have been assisting many past victims and just recently lost a brilliant 23 yrear old mother of two children under the ages of three to murder by the children's father.

This was a brilliant young woman from a loving single parent home, private school graduate and holder of a Bachelors degree in psychology and plans to complete a doctorate in psychology. How could she not see that this relationship could cost her her life. There has been so many questions and only suppositions.

One theory is supply and demand. Needing to be needed. The victim may have an inherent need to be managed in some way. I wonder if that kind of protection and control, if missing from childhood, may play itself out by placing oneself in a position to be dominated and controlled.

I have had the opportunity to speak with the deceased victim a few years ago, and she expressed deep regrets about the loss of her father after the divorce of the parents. She always longed to just have her dad in her life.He was not capable of providing for her what she really longed for.

In spite of the fact that a single parent provided all the physical and financial frills that was required, the emotional lack was still very evident.This lack created a need which found a source to feed the need.

The unfortunate,thing is that these needs are fear driven and thereby attracts its own type. The source is then fear driven and not genuine love in which there is consistent kindness, respect and freedom.

But how does an intellient person confuse the facade for the real thing? Could it be that the real thing may be obscured? What if you seek it from those you expect to have it in abundance for you but they don't? Do you really know then, what to expext from genuine love?

The ability of the only parent to give the love missing due to the absence of the estranged parent must be at least "challenged". This parent is also dealing with her / his own pain from abuse, loss, shame, bearing the burdens of the family single handedly in addition to financial difficulties.

The child also bears the heavy burden of this tremendous loss of self, wholeness and develops a greater yearning for what they do not have.

This may be the reason for the relationships between some young girls and older men, could this be the safari that they are on, only to discover a fierce animal seeking its prey.

So how was the animal created? Evidence also proves that the perpetrator is often emotionally deficient if not bankrupt. What type of unmet needs and unresolved pain, fear, loss and other strong emotions that drives the perpetrator to attempt to gain control by controlling another.

An obvious sick cycle that is played out in a variety of ways. Some of these manifestation of Domestic Terrorism include:

name-calling or put downs keeping a partner from contacting their family or friends withholding money stopping a partner from getting or keeping a job actual or threatened physical harm sexual assault stalking intimidation

Abuse is never a one time event. It may not occur all the time, but is intermittent with patterns of wonderful "make ups".

Don't be fooled, do not stay in such a dangerous. Seek help and support to protect and defend yourself before it is TOO LATE.