I was recently out of work, and started getting suggestions from friends about new career paths. That got me thinking, what other special skills do I possess?? Here is a short list of jobs that I could do well and deserve to paid handsomely for:

unnecessary errand runner
picture straightener
junk mail opener
scooper of poop
dispensor of unsolicited advice
stuck together grocery cart un-sticker
BBQ potato chip taster
sun tan lotion applier
pile rearranger
American Idol of the shower third runner-up
pigeon and squirell feeder
dirty pan in the sink soaker
water bottle un-finisher
watcher of cooking shows (no cooking, just watching)

Thank you to my facebook friends for these suggestions:

belly button lint remover
toe nail cleaner
monkey handler (there's more to that story)
banana peel slipperiness tester
crash test dummy
spider bite judge
light socket tester
light socket taster
light socket licker (one great idea begats another)
human speed bump
finger vice salesman
expired unused concert ticket salesman
parking meter feeder
arm pit odor sniffer
vegetable de-wormer
model for "don't walk" and "wet floor" signs

This is just a starting list, I welcome any and all alternative career suggestions,

Then I can write "Brilliant Careers Part 2 "

Thanks for reading my Hub!!

empty toilet paper roll replacer (see my hub on life's mysteries)

web-site browser

Nintendo wii athletic coach

creator of ambience

finder of the remote

remover of cat hair from clothes and the furniture and the carpet and....

light and assorted electronic appliance turner-offer

loser of car keys

fast-forwarding thru the commercials tv watcher (after finding the remote, of course)

plastic plant leaf-cleaner and duster of mini-blinds

air-borne odor cover-upper

HubPages writer!!