Description: This is obviously about “getting the girl” – Just a little advice I decided to give the guys, but the ladies might find it interesting too. It was a fun piece for me to write. Enjoy.

First things first – I am not a relationship expert, nor do I consider myself a “ladies man”, so the advice and tips I’m giving in this article should not be taken as a 100% “fail-safe” or “fool-proof” “to-do” list; it’s just the things that I’ve learned over time through trial and error. This is simply what has worked for me.

Fellas, this isn’t as hard as we tend to make it out to be. It’s a just a few, things to keep in mind at all times; be respectful, sincere, patient, attentive and humbling. Usually, when I see a woman I find attractive, and want to get to know, I observe her and make an assessment. Do not confuse this with stalking, it’s completely different. For example; if she’s someone I see regularly, such as a co-worker; I’m attentive to her attitude and how she presents herself. Is she quiet and a loner, or the center of attraction? Is she a “people-person”, a flirt, materialistic? Etcetera, etcetera, you get the idea. Its important to make this assessment before going any further because despite her exterior beauty, she may not be someone you want to get involved with.

Next, I begin to listen but I never stop observing. Listening is very important. I listen whenever she speaks, whether to me or someone else. Yes, you have to “ear-hustle” from time to time, but who don’t? I’m listening to see if she’s educated or uneducated, sadity or humble, lively or somber, etc… Do she airs out her “dirty laundry”, is she a gossiper? Is she divorced or pregnant? Single or engaged? Heterosexual, bisexual, lesbian, and so forth? Do she like Roses or Orchids? What’s her favorite perfume, cologne? Is she a single parent, a vegetarian or do she prefer a medium-rare steak? Do she love or hate pets and animals? Guys, women will tell you everything without ever speaking a word to you—just listen.

By now you should have some idea of how to begin an effective and appropriate approach, but first she has to know you exist. At this point, you only want her to notice you, not your attraction to her. Before you can reveal your attraction, she has to become familiar, and develop a sense of comfort with you. This is usually done one way, with the same guidelines and small adjustments that specifically accommodate your particular situation. For example, if your love interest is the co-worker; gradually initiate light conversation, maybe about recent events or “cute” jokes, but keep it brief, respectful, and impersonal; almost as she’s just another girl in the office. Eventually, she’ll start initiating conversation and speaking to you, and before you know it, you’ll be sharing lunch.

On the other hand, your love interest may not be a co-worker, she may be the clerk at the local corner store or gas station, right? So what do you do?—Become a regular customer. Make a mental note of when she’s there and when she’s not, then time your visits, but never ask her co-workers about her; they’re libel to label you a stalker, warn her, and ruin any chance you may have because now she’ll just see you as the “creepy-stalker-guy”. Counter this by getting to know a couple of her co-workers as well, so you’re a welcomed and familiar face to everyone. Create a regular purchase and visit her check-out lane as much as possible, it won’t take long before she separates you from everyone else—trust me on this one. Once she’s used to your face and considers you as that “regular”, begin switching up your purchase, and see how quick she notices. You may be asking yourself—“what does that accomplish?” It makes her initiate convo because she’ll most likely mention something about the switch. However, you can’t be afraid to initiate conversation either. Pay attention to her facial expressions and demeanor. If she looks exhausted don’t tell her she looks tired, say something like this; “Long day, huh? Smile, its almost over” I promise you those few words will light up her face with a smile from ear to ear (and possibly spark a conversation), then compliment her smile, but again, be brief and respectful. Fellas, if you can get a woman to smile, especially if she doesn’t want to; then your job is halfway done—major bonus points there!

Ok, you’ve done a lot of work so far, but the road ahead will definitely test your endurance, persistence, and how bad you want her, so be patient, relax, and breathe. This is the crucial, transitional process, which may take months or longer to complete (I never said this was an overnight thing). Your goal is to progress from the “co-worker” or “regular” to a friend, then a good or close friend. Throughout this process you have to maintain your image and “step ya game up”; make sure she always sees you looking sharp and well-groomed, its okay to be seen in sweats and a tee periodically, but ultimately you want her to instill a clean and fresh visual of you in her mind; most women prefer a clean cut man. She also has to know you’re in her corner; console her, support her, encourage her, show signs of affection, look out for her, do things “just because”, things that no one else can. Finally, proudly express your attraction for her to her, and others with confidence. I can’t tell you when’s the right moment to do this, but trust me, you’ll know, chances are, she’ll already know it, and will have begun to develop one for you too. When she sees you’re not afraid to express your feelings to her, or others for that matter, she’ll be making “googly-eyes” and considering you as a potential “significant other”. Finally, what-ever you did to win her over—don’t stop doing it afterwards! I stressed this in another article, but its sooo important, simply put. . .Whatever you do the get the woman, you have to do to keep the woman. Good luck!