MakeOver Sex Life

Got a less-than-thrilling sex life? Insert Tab A into Slot B. What could be harder when it comes to sex? The truth is, things can get less electrifying along the way. The attachments may not perform up to par. You may have lost the connection. Or it could be a medical issue that warrants tech support.

I WANT MORE SEX

While your partner are away

Build up the anticipation for sex through emails, text messages or talking on the phone. Make promises about what you're going to do to him when you next meet. Phone sex is a good way to express what fantasies you both have. Talking about your fantasies is also a good way to take away embarrassment.

Keep it fresh

Change the time you have sex. If you usually do it at night, have it in the morning. Change the place too. Take it into a different part of the apartment or outdoors. Just don't get arrested for indecent exposure! Alternatively, try using food as a prelude to sex. Cook the food together, and then feed each other, starting with dessert.

Mix business with pleasure

Go on one of his trips with your partners. Constance can organize a vacation just before or after any business trip, so that the periods of absence won't feel so long. It is also more economical this way too, as you're paying only one person's airfare.

Make naughty promises

Naughty promises can keep both of you panting for more. It could be a sexual favor that both always wanted from Constance. The trick is to pick something that the couple hasn't tried to heighten his/her anticipation while he/she is away. Before he/she leaves, Constance could stick notes in the appointment book, suitcase and toiletry bag to keep him reminded of the treat him/her going to get when he/she returns.

Find a balance

Raging libidos can deflate with age, work stress, parenting responsibilities, medical problems (certain medications can affect your libido) and boredom. But once couples are aware of these, they can focus on solutions. Sex also gets better for many couple as they age. Plus practice makes them better lovers.

Many 20-somethings couple could become so consumed in their careers that they forget about sex and their relationship. They may also be too engrossed with life on the Internet that they have no time for real life.

That's why career-minded couples should focus on having a balance in their lives. Examine the number of hours you spend at work, or on the Internet. If you've been putting more time in the office or at the desk at home than with your loved one, swap it around. Devote at least an hour of quality time each day talking with each other. Ban all hand phone, TV and other distractions during this time. If you're not much of a talker, share an activity or project - wash the car or paint the apartment.

WHY DON'T I HAVE THE ENERGY FOR SEX

Leave the dog out

No sex in front of your child, it's no different with a pet. Leave the dog outside the room. Train it not to bark, scratch or whine. Don't use dog as an excuse to avoid sex.

Read on to find out improve a mundane sex life.

Undo the clutter

To make their surroundings more conducive for lovemaking, couple should immediately get rid of clutter in the bedroom. Keep the memories but throw unused items out. Store things at their parent's house or rent a storage space. Or have new shelves built near the ceiling to keep clutter off the floor.

Next, redecorate the bedroom to rejuvenate its energy. No need for expensive makeovers -change to a warmer light by using a different light-bulb, or buy beautiful new bed sheets.

Energy crisis

Accept that it is OK not to have energy for sex. If you resist, you'll end up over-pushing yourself and resent it. Give yourself permission to not have energy. Promise each other not to have sex, and just hold hands and cuddle. This way, the pressure's taken off and you can focus on relaxing. Once you're rested, the desire for sex will return. But even when you agree not to have sex, at least connect for 10 minutes a night. Let the less-tired party cradle the more stressed first; then switch.

Lie still

In the morning, instead of jumping out of bed and rushing through the myriad of things to do, lie still together for a few minutes and simply breathe together. It relaxes and makes you feel connected to each other by simply being together.

Spend the weekend together

On weekends, go for a walk or bike together. Getting active stimulates chemicals in the body that recharge you. Or pop down to downtown for dinner and let the energy spilling from the restaurants and bars infuse you. Another sex booster is to keep a naughty diary of your sexual fantasies and thoughts over the week. Exchange diaries over the weekend, and make those fantasies come true.