My day to day grind can be really challenging. From point A to point B and back again, I rush around trying to accomplish everything I need to do with the sense of urgency and haste. It’s a busy lifestyle many lead, and sometimes it almost feels as though being busy helps make the day go more smoothly. There comes a time, though, when I feel like I’ve reached the tipping point and really need some time to myself and the television just won’t do.  This is the point of the daily grind where the interactions with people at work, at school, and at church and elsewhere can really lead me to feel very drained. These are the days I can’t afford to skip lunch, but I catch myself doing it anyway. Over time, I’ve learned that a 15 minute breather using these exercises or some form of them helps me exponentially compared to the small amount of time they take.

Meditation can be an excellent way to deal with stress and your connections with those around you when you only have a few minutes to spare. There are many ways to meditate; you might choose religious or secular, physical or non physical, spiritual or non spiritual. If you find a method that works well for you, though, you will probably also be able to find a greater sense of well being and increased connection with the people around you. Many people also claim that meditation can help them improve willpower, memory, control over emotions, and even the ability to compete. I consider my original meditation path as secular, but you will see by my explanations that you will likely develop spiritual connections. During meditation you can focus on a word, a sound, a mantra, or nothing.

Not medical advice or recommendations: Here are the steps I take to achieve my own state of deep meditation. I will offer options along the way and please remember that it took me some time to find a clear state of mind. When I don’t have a lot of time, I often shorten these steps to 10-20 minutes. With practice, I’ve learned to appreciate this time more and extend my meditation times.

I like to do a few stretching exercises before my meditation sessions. This is a preference and you might be able skip it if you don’t have the time. When I’m at the office I stretch sitting right at my office chair. When I’m at home I move to the couch or the floor. I stretch my arms, my legs, my neck, and my back. Releasing the tension gets my blood flowing and also just feels good anyway. During the stretching I pay special attention to every feeling in my body. I start to focus on this rather than the daily tasks and rush. If my mind wonders back to stressful ideas, I recognize that, and then consciously refocus on my body.

If I am at home in the morning, I like to find an east facing window so the rising sun can shine on my face and add a whole new connection. If it is evening, I like to light a single candle on the floor and put it directly in front of my meditation space.

After stretching I give my body a moment to settle and my mind to clear again. This is a good time to think about how my body is part of the world around me. In order to help this connection along, I like to imagine that I am ‘plugged in’ to the planet. If this sounds strange to you, just consider that you have the ability to release all of your stress and negative thoughts into the air or ground by breathing out. So, I take a deep breath, and then as I exhale I imagine all of the negative energy leaving my body. Next, when I take another breath in, I imagine completely new and positive energy flowing into my body. If this sounds cheesy to you, just try it. If it doesn’t work, try another way. Any form of this exercise that helps you breathe deeply and allow thoughts to flow freely out of your body and then back in should do.  With practice, this part of the process can rewarded me with a relaxing sense of renewal.

After the breathing exercise I am usually relaxed and focused enough to clear my mind completely. Clearing my mind in this stage means different things depending on the day. For example, if I am very stressed and eager to meditate to feel better, I will need to clear my mind of expectations from my meditation. If I am worried about a work or family problem, I will need to clear my mind of this and focus on breathing and quietness. If there is a song or sound running through my head, sometimes I need to clear it out and other times I can meditate on a sound or song alone. Clearing could always mean something different for you and it could always mean the same thing for you. If I cannot clear my mind it is also okay to meditate on my distractions. The underlying rule to clearing my mind seems to be that there are no rules. I simply recognize the distraction in that moment, accept it, and then let it go to reflect back on quietness and my breathing.

During certain meditation sessions I can be very in tune with my breathing and quietness. During these sessions I can usually activate my deep thought patterns at will. Two methods usually work for me, and one works more often than the other. The first, less reliable method for me is to listen to moderately loud music with no lyrics. Music by The Crystal Method seems to do it for my brain because of the heavy bass patterns and many different sounds and musical patterns. You can experiment with different music. I will admit that a song about meditation by Madonna called ‘Future Lovers’ was actually the first song that led me down the music as a trigger path. Even simply moving your arms and body along with the music can be a great experience if you are relaxed and focused enough.

My favorite and most reliable method to reach a deep meditative state involves sending out positive thoughts and thoughts of love and understanding to all of the people I can think of, one at a time, in that moment. To do this, I bring my hands to the center of my stomach and picture a big globe of warm glowing light. Then, I simply start to think briefly of the people I encountered that day or the day before. It doesn’t matter who I think of, only that they cross my mind. I often make it through many friends, neighbors and loved ones quickly. This process causes my brain activity to skyrocket. I can best describe it as conscious REM, and it might have something to do with my brain synapses firing at a normal than higher rate. It feels like a very positive and constructive sensation, almost like I would imagine brain building or healing would feel. If I had to estimate, I would say I reach this state of mind about half of the time I meditate; sometimes I am unable and sometimes I simply don’t aim to reach this state. I cannot jump into this state at any time and always need to work up to it using a combination of the steps above.

These are the times when I can become completely relaxed and focused on my breathing. They are also the times I pay special attention to how I end the session. When I feel ready to wrap up your longer meditation sessions, I’m sure to take a moment to collect myself before jumping up and walking around. I usually take a deep breath and look down with my eyes closed. Then, I slowly open my eyes, and take the room in bit by bit.

It’s probably a little difficult to believe that I go through this entire process in 10-15 minutes. But, if I have an office door, or a quiet room I can use this method to take a breather from my busy schedule. It can leave me with a very clear view of my day and a clear path to deal with pressure and responsibilities.

I have never meditated with a spiritual leader beyond meditating with Madonna in her songs. She is an excellent guide, but I have also read a lot of material on meditation while developing my path. Please note that this piece is simply an explanation of how I meditate. Please do not read it as medical advice or a recommendation in case the way I do it fries your brain. If you are uncertain about how to proceed or do not feel more at peace with your meditation practices, be sure to see an experienced meditation leader.