Gift-giving at Mother's Day is by and large an expression of love. To give the best gift to your mother, you need to think about how she expresses her love to others. That's how she most readily recognizes expressions of love in others.

According to Dr. Gary Chapman, there are five love languages:

1. Quality Time
2. Words of Affirmation
3. Acts of Service
4. Physical Touch
5. Receiving Gifts

You can determine which love language your mother "speaks" by observing her and thinking about how she reaches out to others. You can also evaluate what hurts her the most.

Is she hurt most when a loved one forgets to get her a gift? Does she enjoy hugs and kisses? Does she value an afternoon of conversation or playing games like Scrabble more than anything else? Is she crushed if someone says something unkind about her or can she just let it roll off like water on a duck's back? Is she most pleased when someone does something for her?

It is true that your mother may speak one, two, or even all five languages pretty well. But I will predict that you will find that one or maybe two stand out above the rest.

Quality Time

For this type of mother, the visit and telephone call that you make is more important than the actual gift you give. Put your effort into reserving some times just for mom.

And if you can make the gift something that will include more of your time, all the better. Perhaps the gift could include tickets to something you would do together. Or maybe you want to give her a coupon book she can redeem to play her favorite game (great for older grandchildren to give). Giving her a game AND the promise that you'll play it with her is the perfect gift for some mothers in this category.

Words of Affirmation

For mothers who speak the love language of words of affirmation, your Mother's Day card should be very carefully chosen. Better yet, try a book of poetry about love and mothers, and read some to her. Pick a framed or engraved gift that includes words of affirmation. And whether you are comfortable with the idea or not, try telling your mother face to face all of the things you cherish about her.

Acts of Service

Does your mother enjoy plants but have a hard time getting them planted? Your act of service could be actually putting that rose bush into the ground for her. Perhaps she would enjoy the day off where every chore is taken care of by someone else. Maybe she needs her car washed or would like to have her windows cleaned. Is there a yard project that has needed attention for some time? Any of these acts of service may mean more to your mother than a gift that you purchase.

With this type of mother, you might also consider a hand-crafted gift. She'll appreciate the time and effort you put into it. If you aren't the handmade gift sort of person, choose something more practical for this mom.

Physical Touch

Hugs and kisses are more important than bows and presents to this mother. Hold her hand while you visit with her. Give her a shoulder massage, if you are both comfortable with that. Stand close by and accessible if she should reach out for your hand or to give you a hug. Make sure she has plenty of time to hold the babies and toddlers in the family. Consider sending mom to a spa for the day so that she can enjoy comforting physical touches which she enjoys so much.

Receiving Gifts

Mothers who speak the love language of receiving gifts don't actually need a more elaborate gift than other moms. They desire that the gift be given more elaborately. Take the time to really package the gift beautifully. Make a big deal out of giving it to her. Everything about the whole gift-giving process is a delight, so don't take any shortcuts here. Gifts for this mom should be something she would never buy for herself. This gift should be an indulgence.

With gift-giving, we all know it's the thought that counts. In this case, think about your mother's love language and choose your gift accordingly. You'll find that she thinks you are the most thoughtful gift-giver ever.