Hello my name is Dave and I have Irritable Bowel Syndrome.  I have struggled with this condition for several years.  I can tell you numerous stories that are funny now, but at the time were pretty humiliating.  Let me give you a little background first.  I had recently gotten out of the Navy and started having stomach problems.  No matter what I ate or drank, I started to get unbelievable stomach cramps and diarrhea.  No matter where or what or when, I knew that within a few minutes I was going to need a bathroom.  This went on for a couple of weeks.  When it went away I thought that I had gotten over a really bad stomach virus.  Sometimes without me even being able to control it I would fart and it would be so nasty that people around me at the movies would get up and leave.  I can sit here right now and chuckle to myself about it.  At the time I was more than embarrassed.  I was alone in the center of a movie theater and people would be either standing in the back or gone.  I had been accused by the movie theater manager of bringing in stink bomb fireworks.  I explained to him that I had just gotten over a stomach bug and that I did not bring any fireworks to see the movie.  It wasn’t good enough for fireworks anyway. 

I kept telling myself that I had just caught a stomach bug that wouldn’t go away.  Eventually I gave in to my family and friends and went to see my doctor.  I was in the doctor’s office waiting area for about 15 minutes and I felt the need for the bathroom.  Let me describe what I mean by the need.  The sweat was starting to bead on my forehead and I was squirming in my chair.  I knew that I was grimacing in pain due to the stomach cramps, and I think I was farting just a little bit.  Parts of this event are either repressed or deleted due to overly embarrassing content.  I was attempting to fight off the cramps (a losing battle) and hold everything together until I could see the doctor.  With several dark looks from nearby patients and a grimace on my face I started the mad dash to the bathroom.  The waiting room was pretty crowded and I knew that the tiny door to the office restroom wasn’t going to hold the smell in that I was about to unleash on these poor unsuspecting people.  I had to bolt for the bathroom and hurdle children and the elderly on my way to the toilet.  I ducked and dodged and finally arrived at the door.  It was locked.  A giant sign was on the door that read “Renovations in Progress”.  “We are sorry for the inconvenience”.  I was in panic mode.  I was going to inconvenience in my pants in about a minute.  Franticly looking from one side of the room to the other as if by magic a bathroom would appear, I was stuck.  I needed a toilet immediately.  The office clerk at the window must have seen my panicked expression and sympathized with my plight and opened the door to the exam rooms and pointed to the bathroom back there.  I was in a flat out sprint down the hallway and arrived at the toilet.  The clerk had summoned the doctor and he came to the door and talked to me through the door and asked me several questions.  I wasn’t really in the position or the mood to carry on a conversation, especially one that was punctuated by the sounds and smells of a full on toilet assault.  During my reenactment of the War of 1812 complete with heavy musket and cannon fire, he was very patient with me.  When I finally could gather myself to leave the bathroom he was waiting and took me to the exam room straight across the hall from the bathroom.   He had made several notes during our brief conversation through the door and had printed off a few pages of information from the internet for me.  He told me that he was pretty sure that I had IBS.  He showed me these pages and explained what it was.  I told him to hold that thought and dashed back to the bathroom.  I went back to the exam room and he told me that he had made me an appointment for that afternoon with a Gastroenterologist.  I had no idea what that was or if I could even spell it at the time (Thank you spell check!!).  I thanked him and went to my next appointment, red in the face from embarrassment and humiliation.  I arrived at the second doctor’s office and talked to him for about an hour and he wanted to do a colonoscopy to confirm my doctor’s diagnosis.  I asked him what that was and he explained the procedure and was very prepared for my response of “Hell No”!!  “There is no way I am letting you stick ANYTHING up there”.  After a few minutes of reassurances and further explanation I relented and scheduled the procedure.  He must have had some experience as a used car salesman now that I think about it. 

I will spare you the details of my humiliating experience at that time and fast forward to the present.  The doctor reviewed my scans and confirmed the diagnosis.  I was diagnosed with IBS, and continue to struggle with it right now.  I was put on a prescription to help manage the symptoms, as there is no cure.  I was taught about the IBS diet and how different foods and beverages can affect this condition.  One example that I will use is coffee.  At the time I was a big coffee drinker.  I would start each morning with a few cups of coffee and think nothing of it.  I have not touched a drop of coffee since my colonoscopy.  I have to drink tea and soda for my caffeine intake now.  Which was a hard adjustment, but I wanted to avoid the debilitating stomach cramps that are associated with IBS.  So I made the switch. 

People will tell you that IBS is not a big deal and can be managed by diet or prescription medications.  I am here to tell you that yes it is manageable, but when it decides to rear its ugly head there is nothing you can do to stop it.  This condition affects one in five adult Americans.  Yet only half of them seek medical treatment.  The Mayo Clinic’s website (http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/irritable-bowel-syndrome/DS00106) has a lot of really good information about this condition.  The website stated that IBS affects women twice as often as men.   It also went on to say that no one is exactly sure what causes it.  There are several theories about causes or triggers, but researchers have been unsuccessful in determining exactly what the culprit is.