My First Encounter With a Jackalope
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How I Met My First Jackalope
In the mid spring of 1967, I was in Canada with my parents for the annual Butter tart festival. I was only 7 at the time and was out in the woods playing. Of course, I had to take a sack of butter tarts with me. I love those sweet little tarts.
I was playing alone and not hurting or bothering anyone. I always loved the wilderness and wanted to be an Indian. I would whoop and holler as I ran around pretending to shoot buffaloes with my bow and arrow. I had such fun as a child.
Almost as if by magic, I saw something on the edge of a clearing. I picked my way, watching every step, trying not to scare it away. It looked really odd to me but I thought it was just a rabbit at first. Little did I know what was about to happen would affect me for the rest of my life.
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Intrigue
I kept walking toward it being careful not to make any sudden moves. It acted as if it didn't notice me. When I saw it going after the sack of butter tarts that I set down so I could play I started walking faster toward it.
The creature looked my way and beckened me to come nearer. it certainly looked friendly enough. I didn't think it would hurt me. As I drew near, it happened! That thing jumped at me cutting my legs from knee to ankle. I bled like a stuck boar hog.
At the Hospital
Fortunately I was able to call out to my mother. She came running and carried me to the car, then dad drove us to the hospital. They got the bleeding stopped, and stitched me up. They healed up as best as can be expected, but the scars remain even today.
My Vow
I vowed that day to rid the world of these creatures. I had no idea what they were called, but I knew I would find out eventually. I was in high school before I realized they were called Jackalopes. I studied up on them through most of my adult life and know their habits better than they do.
They are pure evil and nothing is good about them. Don't let their cute looks deceive you. Cuteness isn't always good you know.
Thanks to My Fans
I would like to thank all my fans who support me in this vendetta.
Again. I appreciate your support in my vendetta.
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Comments
Called out to your mother? If you say so. But the way I remember it, the only way your mother would've heard that catterwalling was if she was a dog, or a Jackalope. I didn't know that the human voice was capable of such a high pitched scream. Such a fuss over a scratch on your wittle knee.
What's in a name?
What's in a name you ask? Letters mostly.
Poor Hunter. No wonder there is so much hatred inside you for jackalopes. Is there something I can do to help you get rid of your anger?
lol lol lol
I see you are joining a few fanclubs, today. Trying to recruit help, are we?
I think maybe you should be attacked by a Jackalope Lady Guinevere. I don't think you would be laughing about it then!!!
B.T. Evilpants says:6 minutes ago
I see you are joining a few fanclubs, today. Trying to recruit help, are we?
MH. I gave you plenty of time to recruit help. You have been here for months before I came.
LET THE GAMES BEGIN!!!
I am Canadian and we have no Jakkalopes in any of the ten provinces of Canada...at the time you were a boy there were only nine Provinces b/c Newfoundland didn't join until 1949
It's been six days, friend. Did you give up before you even started? I get this a lot. Everyone wants to be the guy that took down the big bad Jackalope. It always ends the same way. Big tough men, running away calling for their mommies. It's sad, really. Perhaps a bigger gun is in order. I'll be waiting...
Soon I will publlish a top secret document about the team that is behind Jackalope victory and taking over the White House. Do not miss it.
BT, just when you think I have left you to your own devices, I will show up gun in hand. You days are getting shorter and shorter.
It's such a shame that BT would do that to a small child. I don't blame you really for eanting to find him and rid the world of him, but do you have tyo be so violent?
SirDent, Who are you talking to? I haven't seen this guy in quite a while. I suspect he may have had a gun cleaning accident.
I am still around BT. Better watch your back. A presidential candidate who gets assassinated even before the election might be a first for you.
Good luck in your efforts to rid us of this scourge. Perhaps you can apply for some stimulus money to get a bigger gun. The one you have appears inadequate to the task.
I could use a few hundred billion for research and development of Jackalope traps.
Mighty Hunter, I love nature and animals, but if you insist on hunting the wascally wabbits I have a request.
Try to get as much use out of the carcass as possible. Stew from the meat, hats from the fur, weapons to sell to the the Geico cavemen from the bones...
I hate it when humans - the filthy, disgraceful beings they are - hunt an animal and toss the the body aside. It's a waste. We wolves up here in Alaska would never dream of killing a creature unless it was for food or self-defense. (Last I checked Polar Bears taste awful - too fishy from all the seals they eat)
And if you have any left-over meat my cousins the foxes are everywhere, and they always appreciate a good meal.
Oh, i hear that a hunting dog fed on raw bear meat from puppyhood is a better hunter than kibble fed dogs. just saying.
Shirley Anderson says:
17 months ago
Hehe....does BT know yet that you've thanked him for helping you?
When (if) you two meet up again face-to-face, it'll be quite a fight (or so I hear from the butter tart lover).