My Love Affair With Golf
71I became a member on HubPages to be automatically informed of any new hub posted by a friend who dishes out some of the most readable prose. She and a few other good friends have been pestering me to write. I am prepared to amuse them in many other ways but they insist on getting their kicks from shaming me publicly in my writing. Just verbal digs and jabs in private won’t do for them. My protestation about not being able to write to save my life has cut no ice. They want something written in indelible ink, so that it - and comments on it - remains on record!
Women always have the last word. So I have given up, given in and resigned myself to a dubious fate. And what will I write about? What else can any golfer write about, but the game he so loves? This piece is on how my love affair began.
To its addicts, golf is a fascinating and addicting game. As Marilyn Quayle, wife of then Vice President of USA said of her husband, “Dan would rather play golf than have sex any day.” I have been fortunate – no one has ever made such a complaint about me.
Yet I hate to confess that, as a young man, I had not thought much of the game and its practitioners in general. It appeared to be a waste of time and gave its players little or no exercise. Only old fogies could be seen strolling and socializing around the course; they certainly did not seem to be indulging in anything sporty. Sport meant football, basketball or squash. At most, for the sake of older colleagues or lady friends, one could sometimes take a dip into a swimming pool, venture onto a badminton court or stand at the end of a table tennis table. But I would stoop no lower, certainly not to ambling aimlessly on a golf course. After all, a young man needed to exercise and sweat it out in a competitively aggressive manner, rubbing and bruising elbows, shoulders and knees with his buddies.
It was only at age 43, when I was commanding a regiment in Jammu that I was drawn by the pristine charm of a lovely course nearby. It was beautifully laid out along the banks of the clear blue River Tawi, speckled with little hillocks and dunes which were interspersed with stretches of parkland. There were even patches of forest with thick undercover from which one could hear partridges and peacocks calling. That was not all: The staff at the club house was aware that the Captain of the Course was a dear friend. Hence sumptuous English breakfast, tankards of chilled beer, or a proper evening tea (complete with tea cozy, tray cover and choicest muffins), depending on the time of day, was always assured.
Put any self respecting man in such a setting, give him a long stick in his hand and place a ball in front of him. Dang if he doesn’t swing that stick in a manner meant to send the ball flying through the air into the distant horizon! That is how I was enticed into taking my first golf swing.
But the ball was obviously not much impressed: It had a mind of its own. It traveled all of two feet and lay there, still on the tee box, making a mocking face at me.
Martial blood runs in my veins. I concede that some scholars say that the so called pure Punjabi martial blood is actually that of some warring tribes local to the area, blended with generous contributions from the invading armies of Genghis Khan and Alexander the Great. I won’t quibble on the detail with learned historians, but only submit that if foreign blood has been introduced, it is from stock renowned for its fighting prowess, and hence martial it remains, even if not very pure. So there should be no doubt of the ingrained fighting spirit or never-say-die attitude.
You can imagine my feelings about this little white ball smirking at the warrior in me and taunting me to try giving it another whack. I did ... and dug up a foot of earth behind the ball. That silly tease remained unmoved, exactly at the spot from where it had been giving me that smug smile. But at least the grin had been wiped off its face by a shower of uprooted grass and churned earth. So there!
I threw the club aside and headed towards the bar. From behind the shaded glass panes I saw two young lady officers teeing off from another tee box. It was the prettiest of sights. Both their shots rose gracefully onto the air, carried a fair distance and landed softly on the fairway ahead. Then and there, I resolved that I was getting back to the course the very next day after some night practice in my backyard!
Thus began my love affair with the game so famously described by Winston Churchill as one whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose.
A dear friend has recently explained how, for any relationship to grow, it has to be challenged along the way. My tryst with golf has been like that: Challenged! It seems unfair at times, or at too many times. But the love of it again gets me back to the course the next day.
Arnold Daly has described it so well: “Golf is like a love affair: If you don’t take it seriously, it’s no fun. If you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart.”
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Comments
fantasic Jaspal. What a delightful post. Good you listened to the Feline Prophet.
Keep Hubbing
cheers!!!!!
Thank you so much Feline ... Your kind words mean a lot.
As you can see, they can push even a reluctant ex-soldier cum golfer to pick up, of all the strange things, a pen and paper!
Hehe, don't put them down now! I'm sure you have lots more interesting tales to tell.
Thank you Tikuli. Glad you liked it.
About listening to Feline, you know how it is ... one better listen, or else! :)
sweets .....me awestruck (sp check for me pl)
i mean wht the heck ...since when did u develop this ???
amazing would be an understatement hun .....
another wonderful aspect of a more than wonderful guy ....
so you not just """ONE-DERFUL"""anymore ....but bag full of WONDERS EH .....keep up the good work ma sweet baby
love ash
Paaji, tussi great ho...
you have a fair bit of flair for writing...please develop it further and don't try to hide behind misplaced modesty..keep golfing and more importantly - keep writing...you can even do it in bed..
thanks
I shall be just as shameless as FP in saying, "I told you so."
Thanks to your engaging speculation about the relationship between martial blood and perseverance, I now have a complete understanding of why I left the game in frustration...no martial bloodline here!
I am very happy to read this most entertaining and lively Hub, and look forward to reading many, many more.
Thank you Ashima for that fulsome praise. That long overdue chicken chaat is definitely assured for you! :)
Nikky, we must play sometime soon. You are working too hard! Thank you for the confidence reposed in a fellow soldier!
Hahaha!! Great work Jas!! Tussi suchmuch great hon!! :P Love the way you string together your words!
On a different note, its interesting ... guess all the meaningful writing (serious thinking can be done in a humorous manner too!! ) is now moving here.. :P:D
Thats a wonderful piece of writing Jaspal. You have it in you alright, and I'm quite sure now that you have started writing the warrior blood in you will draw blood :-D
All the best for some more wonderfully enchanting strings of words :-)
Sally, you certainly did so! Yours was the final push! :p After making me resign and getting me to do your bidding, how can you possibly say that you don't have martial blood?
I look forward to some good golf with you in the not-too-distant future.
Thanks for the appreciative words. :)
Always knew you were a talented writer! Glad you decided to come out of the closet!! Enjoyed reading your piece....hope you will continue writing. Your #1 Fan.
Congratulations on your foray into writing. What a delightful piece Jas. You seem to have a natural flair...an easy style with a subtle sense of humour... perhaps you were not aware of it so far... you must keep at it now..looking forward to reading a lot more of your musings
Hmmm...so you finally made your way over here and disproved what you kept maintaining...that you couldnt write. You have a way with words, my dear...so now hope to see many more from your keyboard.
But what was said about golf, could maybe said about hubbing too- "Hubbing is like a love affair: If you don’t take it seriously, it’s no fun. If you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart.”
So when's the next one....Jas?
Thank you Uma. Coming as they are, from a girl across that hedge, you know how much they mean! :)
Drawing blood is comparatively easy Ravin! Sitting down to write without a clue about where one is headed, is a different ball game altogether.
Thank you for the encouraging words. :)
Thank you Tigerlily. One might survive as long as it is only me and not the skeletons which come tumbling out of the closet! :p
Nice to see you here Seetha, and thanks for the kind words. Do you think a muse's amusing musing might pass muster? :p
Don't say that Diana! Did you push me into this for yet another heartbreak? I've had enough of them!! :)
Glad you think I can write a little bit. I'm still not too sure! :p
Next one? Next year!
I knew you could write beautifully! Lets see some long emails now.... haha, I guess that is reserved for the 'love' of your life. Keep young and do new things. Great first write up.
Ah, Jas!....So you definitely hit that one straight down the fairway, I must say!....very professional and super flair!....do keep them coming...just think of the hub as the little white ball that needs to be struck once a day....if not more.....:-)
Great going!:-)
I am sooo tempted to quip "Men and their balls!" Great hub, Jaspal, the fauj made a soldier out of you and we shall make a compulsive writer out of you. Look forward to more of your hubs
A commendable job....really enjoyed reading every bit of it........well my verdict is that you should take time out from golf & write more :-))
Waiting to read many more of your write ups.
Pushi, one of the many good things about golf is that it doesn't expect any emails! Just get out there and enjoy.
Have you started golfing or not yet?
Rashmi, with your good wishes and some luck, let's hope one keeps hitting them long and low, straight down the centre of the fairway!
But once a day?! If it was that little white dimpled ball, I certainly wouldn't mind. :)
Phoenix, yours is a compliment that is highly cherished, coming as it does from a much celebrated master of the art of blogging. :)
Your words of encouragement are much appreciated Nandzie! But, you don't want me taking time out from golf ... I'm hardly getting to play these days!
Amazing Effort,Unbelievable work,Stupendous.
Keep Up The Good Work.I Knew You Had It In You Sweetheart...!!!!
Welcome to the writing side of hubpages! I don't get golf at all, since a nice walk in the country is much more fun when it's not interrupted by moments of frustration.
I look forward to reading more of your work!
8765 u always had it in u....keep blogging.....Pants
Thank you Manu ... it sure is unbelievable - I actually got pushed into pushing a pen! :p Thanks for the confidence.
Anne, it's someone we both know who pushed me over to this side! :p
Golf is not just a good walk spoiled ... After one has achieved a basic understanding and control, it is no longer frustrating. Yes, the occasional shot does deflate one's ego, but then there are others which give you such a hgh.
There's a lot to be said for the game. :)
Good to see you here Rajesh ... and thanks for your encouragement. You obviously know me better than I do myself! :p
Jasp:Good job done, you started playing golf and 43 and I started at 45, I think we missed a whole lot in life just by organizing snacks and lunches for those old fogies and their wives on the golf course in our hey day while in the Army but still better late than never, it is a wonderful game.
So good!
Great writing Jaspal! You have a real way with words! :)
Now I'm waiting to read more..
@ Vinod: You said it buddy!
Now we are the old fogeys ... and it is our turn to enjoy beer and lunch at the 19th hole as much as the game on the preceding 18!
I still remember we both started together, you were at Jodhpur and I was at Jammu. And every night we'd exchange notes on the progress being achieved! :)
Thanks tdarby ... :)
Thank you Mini - don't you think reading is so much more fun than writing? :p
Hey Chief::This is not bad for a first time, as first times go..a little of this and little of that and a lot of Jasp in between..Good show, ole chap, keep it up and the Golfing too! You have done a much better job at writing than what you did at golfing..Cheerz !!
Dear Jaspal,
Golf never fascinated me....As i did not see much action in the game... it always gave me an impression of a royal game, where the player is so delicate that the most he can do is send that li'l ball away by a few meters...Player who cant even carry sport equipment on his own...
But then when i talked to golfers about this game...they all seemed to be in love with this 'Royal Game'.
You know the best part of the piece written by you was taking me to the beauty of Jammu 'course', near beautiful river Tawi, the pristine beauty of nature's grace, the luxury you enjoyed, the tea that motivated you to pick up 'Tea' for a takeoff!
Reading thru was like a lovely nature trail for me...and you did succeed in providing a lavish platter to all your readers!
@ Ravi: Gracias amigo for the comment on the writing. :)
How many strokes would you like on the golf course? :p
Thank you Anita ... yes, some of the golf courses must rank right on top amongst the most beautifully landscaped real estate in the world.
About being a "royal sport" ... It definitely doesn't pump the adrenalin the way sky diving, mountain climbing or river rafting - sports that you are fond of - do. Caddies are common in India because labour is cheap here. In the West, you either pay for and hire a cart or you lug your bag on your back or on a trolley.
hello, loooong time!
you've begun blogging, excellent! i wish i could add constructively to the comment section but my sporting prowess is slightly less than that of the average paraplegic, so.... :)
Hi ....Your assimilation of thought is good. You have elaborated your ideas on the game of golf well….you can write very well….keep it up Jaspal.
Hey Divya, good to see you here .... I am not sure of your sporting ability and I suspect you are being overly modest; but your mental calibre I do know is that of a genius. Take care. :)
@ Tanu: Lolol. Thanks for not ordering me back to school!! :p
So enjoyed the humor and your way with words. Hope you will write a lot more and keep me informed too. :-)
I do take my love affair with golf seriously. Unfortunately, so far this season, golf must be cheating on me with someone else, because golf has been very distant and unaffectionate towards me... As a matter of fact, golf has been downright insulting and mocking to me.
I MUST somehow mend this relationship! :-)
Thank you Sujatha ... glad you enjoyed it. Am not so sure about writing more. I'm clueless about what to write on and where to start. :)
Curtis I can sympathize with your feelings. As you know, a bad day or phase can happen to anyone, even the best.
Don't take it too seriously ... but flirt on and enjoy all the pleasures that the game has to offer. :)
She'll come around ...
wow, that was really interesting...
.....reading the mind of master golfer is so
much more fun than writing ;)
keep writing.. I'll keep reading :)
Thank you C ... it's so good to see old golfing friends here.
Not much of a master here, but I suspect that even more fun than reading the mind might be the reading of greens when we play a round together sometime. It's long overdue! :)
My 11 yr old son just received his first set of clubs this past winter. I am anxious to see what he does this summer. Great Hub!
My best wishes for your son, RV. Is he now going to take some lessons or will you be taking him to the practice range and also on the course.
I did a combination of the two - occasional lessons from the pro, and a few games with me - for my two younger sons when they started at ages 17 and 14. No doubt they learnt more from the pro. But the fun we had together, few times that we did play, was something I will never forget! :)
This is so visual and understated, I love it. The humor... I can imagine the warrior scene, wondered actually if you have any Viking in you, lol. I am going to enjoy your writing for a very long time.
Oh and yes, Finnegan is a soft coated wheaten terrier-- a stinker pie who loves to stand in the muckiest slime and drink it down. He's already had one bout with giardhea...
Lolol ... none that I know of - the Vikings had exploited far and wide in Europe, but India would have been too hot for their comfort, especially this June! :)
Finnegan's a lucky guy. When it comes to splashing around and making merry in mud and slime, our Fido is no better. And he's been through something similar a couple of years ago - had to be put on the drip for a few days! And he's been spoilt silly by the boys. But, dogs do bring so much joy to the lives they touch.
"If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play at it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf." --- Bob Hope
Great Hub ...
jfx
Thanks for reading Housedad. Am glad you enjoyed it.
Bob Hope was so very right!
That's a really smart dog you have as your avatar. Is he your pet?
Yes, that’s Murphy, my Burmese Mountain Dog, still a pup but over 100 pounds already (48 kg?)
Delightful - you have a wonderful way with words! I'm so glad FP persuaded you to write here - hope to read many more hubs!
Housedad: Murphy's a handsome guy. How many months old is he? A kg is 2.2 lbs, so you are almost right with the conversion! :)
Shalini: Thank you so much. I've read and really enjoyed some of your hubs too. Are you a golfer by any chance?
Two hubs, 39 fans and a rating of 89. Amazing job, Jaspal my friend.
I plead guilty to the first charge of producing two hubs. But not to any crimes of commission or omission that may be associated with the other two numbers!
Do you think that being a friend of someone with 84 hubs, 280 fans and a rating of 98 might be considered a mitigating factor by the powers that be when they dole out the punishment? :p
thanks share your experience.
Thank you for reading Prasetio. Are you a golfer too?
Well, my rating goes up and down depending on my activity... and my redheaded flashes of mood :).
Great hub, Jaspal. I played as a boy in Scotland (with my grandfather's hickory shafted clubs, but didn't persevere. Cricket and badminton were my games. Enjoyed your tale of 'initiation'
I believe you Story - leave alone the godfathers of HubPages, even the good Lord above would be affected by your redhead moods! :p
Glad you enjoyed reading this hub, Paraglider. I love badminton too. But, you will agree that it does not matter which games one plays - as long as one gets out and plays something! Having a sporty attitude to life and a sportsman's spirit in our dealings is what is most important....
I thought I had already commented on your golf hub...
I'm not a golfer, but some very close to my heart are, and I see first-hand their fascination with golf and almost spiritual connection they feel to the game.
thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings
You should start playing the game, Elisabeth, I think you will fall in love with it too. :) And Oz does have some really beautiful courses!
I'm only good at mini-putt golf I'm afraid. :)Or on the Wii resort game. Its so much fun! If only I could transfer my skills to the real thing, huh?
I like the way you incorporate humour in your writing ! wonderful hub...Thanks for sharing !
Awesome i can say dear keep up hope to hear frm u soon
Always willing to help Gwennies, if you'd like some personal coaching! :)
Thank you Crayonbrains - glad you liked it. :)
Thank you Ranikaur ... when are we playing?
You make me want to take up Golf, almost :)
You should take it up Ethel ... it is a lot of fun after you start getting a hang of it ... and it usually becomes a very healthy addiction!
I did not have time to read all of the comments, but I can only imagine that they were glowing. Your friends were right! You should be writing more! Very Eloquent! I am now your fan and hope to see more...
Thank you eyeofh .... most of the comments above are from friends, and they are nice people, partial towards their friends .... so don't believe all that they say!
Balderdash. You are too modest. Your friend, Sally.
See, one can always bank on a friend!
I stumbled on this hub of yours Jaspal more by accident than design. I could ofcourse make out that you have great writing skills from your earlier comments so I am not surprised at the quality of the Hub.
I am sure you have many interesting anecdotes to recount from your fauji and non-fauji days. It would be great if you shared them.
Thank you Sabu .... guess I am a bit lazy in the writing department! Will probably get down to it one of these days.
I am waiting to read about your recent exploits on the beaches of Goa and on the Himachal hills ...
The Himalayan trip seems to have taken the writing spirit out of me Jaspal. But you are right I must get down to it before the memory goes out of my head.
Nice work! It makes me miss golf already though, the courses won't open up for another five months! Can't wait to read some more.
Feline Prophet says:
7 months ago
Well, I'm shameless enough to say 'I told you so'! What a wonderful job you've done of writing your first hub Jaspal...eminently readable and tinged with the tongue in cheek humour you're such a master of. As for your tryst with golf, ignominious beginnings notwithstanding, it's brought you much joy...hope your journey on HubPages is much the same! :)