Nellie in doggiewood catifornia

Nellie Bellie Baby D. "Dummies guide to training Humans"

I do Love my humans very much. Lately though I don't think we are on the same page. I require a proper amount of sleep. What Queen doesn't? I'm in my deepest sleep dreaming about me being the next "Ameridog Idol" when the loudest, most destructive noise interrupted me being announced as the winner when singing "Who let the Cats Out?" I just love that song. Anyway, the noise. Why now? Why during sleep time? Why EVER? They have this tool in the house that sucks things up! A lot of things. I have to be careful and make sure my toys are always on my bed when I' m done playing with them. I'm afraid that if I didn't they would be sucked away forever. I did try and do something about this the last time this happened to me (yesterday), but the human Dad must have magic fingers. I admit I chewed on the cord. I took my punishment good. When they called me to their "big sucker" I stayed right there. Although I should have paid attention when they were talking to me, I didn't. I missed something. I'm really sorry. I have had a one track mind on my singing, my vocal range and getting my beauty sleep. While they were talking to me I was singing "Jesus take the Wheel." My humans go to church and I hear it a lot. Has a nice meaning to it to. So to sum things up for you my singing career and winning Ameridog Idol means a lot to me. Proper amounts of rest always makes for a more confident performance. You have to be your best always. Especially in front of Simone Howl. He's the brutal dog on the panel. How can I possibly get across to my humans that the sucking device is a great aggravation to me? I've seen those Dummy books to read so I am wondering if there is one for training humans. And fast. I'm already in Doggiewood, Catifornia. I'm not ready to be sent home now. I want to WIN! And still the noise goes on. I give up, that thing is still running and sucking everything in it's way. That's it. I'm attacking it! This sucker is not going to get in my way!

P.S. Dear Diary one more thing to add. Even when I chased it and barked really mean, it didn't stop. I can't get across to my humans of what I think of "The Sucker" but if I keep doing this when they turn it on maybe they will get the hint. If not I can always work on the cord again.

Author: Nellie Bellie Baby D.