Welcome to the sometimes wonderful, often awful, world of dating in the

workplace. Whether you have a crush on a higher-up or an inkling for a

intern, mixing business and pleasure is almost never a good idea. But,

let's face it, sometimes inner office hijinks can be irresistible -- so

here's how to make sure you make it through a workplace rendezvous

unscathed.

Familiarize yourself with the HR policy. Not all companies

have the same stance on inner-office romance. Some

companies allow it, others discourage it, and a few even

have written policies that ban it. After becoming familiar

with your own company's policy on inner-office dating,

consider whether or not the relationship is worth the potential

risks to your career and reputation.

You're not fooling anyone. If you decide to continue with

your office fling, be open with your employers and your

coworkers. Nothing is worse than dishonesty in these

situations, especially because most people are savvy enough

to realize what is really going on. Inform human

resources and your employer, and casually let your

coworkers know thescoop. Of course, torrid details are not

necessary, but make sure that you aren't letting deception

ruin your otherwise impeccable reputation.Avoid naughty

email exchanges. Save the romantic words for your sweetie

until the bell has rung. Emailing via the company computer is

a recipe for disaster, especially if that email recounts personal

exchanges that would be humiliating if made public

In relationships, couples tend to take on certain roles. One of the most popular roles is that of a victim. Typical victim behavior includes pouting, sulking, running away from arguments, refusing to make decisions or take responsibility for situations, and adding more to one's to-do list in order to feel like a martyr.

What happens in relationships in which there is a victim? It creates a need for the other partner to respond to this behavior in one of two ways. He can either be the villain (the person who is causing the victim to cry, sulk, etc.) or he can be the hero (the person who is trying to comfort the often inconsolable victim). Neither situation is preferable, because when you get to the bottom of it, it is all roleplay. (And not the good kind!)

When you act insincerely in your relationship, such as by crying and refusing to reveal why, acting weaker than truly are, or causing a scene just for the attention and drama it creates, you are cheating you and your partner out of an authentic, lasting connection.

Like the boy who cried wolf, a partner who always cries victim soon becomes an untrustworthy source and her needs fall on deaf ears. Meanwhile, her partner is stuck internalizing all of the negative feedback, sometimes to the point that he actually does act out the villainous behavior of which he has been accused.

What's the lesson here? The next time your partner lets you down or makes you angry, don't embrace it as an opportunity to take the stage and play the victim. Instead, give your feedback maturely and authentically. If you want to cry and yell, go ahead. But just make sure it is coming from your real emotions, and not from a need for melodrama.

Try to keep it professional. Don't let your newfound crush change the way

you treat each other. Keep it professional as much as possible when at

work, and save the cutesy nicknames and special treatment for when you are

at home. Additionally, don't devote all your time to one another.

Maintaining a rapport with other coworkers is part of being a savvy

businessperson, as you never know when you might need those contacts later

in life.

Take the high road. If the relationship should end, coming into work will

definitely be stressful and emotionally trying for some time. However, you

can keep the office as tension-free as possible if you both agree not to

gossip about the relationship with other coworkers. Take the high road and

try to maintain a respectful and professional demeanor, especially in

front of others.

If you can't resist the lure of a cubicle cutie, go ahead and give dating

in the workplace a try. But don't say I didn't warn you!