Sounds like a perfect match, quietly running background checks on each other. It used to take a special kind of person to do that. Now it is becoming more commonplace.

If you have reservations about internet or online dating, because you are concerned about your safety, it's understandable. Frankly, you should be concerned about safety when you meet strangers in a bar, a grocery store or anywhere else, if romance is the goal. A stranger is, after all, a stranger. But, just because you have concerns, you don't have to throw the baby out with the bath water.

As long as you are using the internet to seek relatioinships, why not use the internet to investigate the background of the other party? Did you know that some dating services are even offering the option to get a background check on a potential hookup? Background checks for online dating makes some sense and are becoming not only acceptable, but popular, particularly as a relationship appears to become "investable."

Like doing anything else on the internet, when you don't know where to begin, just go to Google, or your favorite search engine and enter "background check." You will see a lot of companies offering the service. Fortunately, when it comes to choosing one, you probably won't have to also run background check on the company doing background checks, but you might be lucky enough to see a review or two from a former client.

What can you expect in a background check? First there is the matter of confirming an individual's actual identity. They will try to match a combination of the name, residence or postal information and date of birth, if available. Likewise, if there is a social security number available, or part of one they will try to match it. But if you possess the "stranger's"social security number, or part of it, maybe the other party should be running this check on you, instead. Never can be too careful.

Once the company has verified the identity, i.e., that they are going to do a check on the actual correct person, they can do the backgound search across a number of different variables, discussed below.

A lot of people would like a background checks on their dating partners. After all, who wants to invest his or her emotions - and ultimatly a lot more - in a pathological liar, sociopath, or, even worse, a criminal. Some do, of course, but that's another article. When you pay for a background check, you are paying for answers, at a minimum, to the following questions:

* Is he/she lying about his/her name, age, occupation, location, etc (Who would ever lie about his or her age?)

* Is he/she currently married? (What do you mean, he already told you he is married?)

* Does he/she have a criminal background?

* Is there evidence or history of domestic violence or abuse with a family court?

What would all this cost you? Probably not as costly as a private eye... though Philip Marlow only charged $25 dollars a day plus expenses, back when the blue plate special cost 15 cents. But face it, researching available information and public records is a lot of what a private eyes does. If you are using a dating service that offers a background check as an option, it will be less costly. But if you need to find a service provider, a background check can cost you anywhere from $15 to $80. That's just a background check. You don't want to have the person followed or anything.

And what are the caveats? If you choose the lowest bidder to provide the service, your background check may be outdated by a few years. This could happen even if you pay more, of if your dating service who offers the service doesn't know exactly what it's doing. Such information would come into play in trying to assess whether dream girl or dream guy is actually perfectly, and happily married. And then, in rare instances, maybe the person you are doing a background check on has had his identity stolen, or is the indentity stealer so you aren't checking the person, or the identity you think you are. Oh dear, this could get complicated...

No matter how careful or perceptive you are you can meet crazy people, cheaters, liars, theives, award-winning actors and habitual optimists, whether on the internet, or at church. So, the best advice, apart from whether or not to get a basic background check, is to learn about dating safety, online and offline.

More articles about Online Dating.