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P.S. I Still Love You - Part 4

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By jayb23


“ Dear Arvind

I really don’t know how you will feel after reading this letter. Iam at all pains at writing this letter. By this time you must have finished crying and must have been missing me also. Now that Iam dead, I want to tell you something. Arvind, if you remember the letter I had written threatening to divorce you; well it was just to make you love me more.

Just 2 days before I wrote that letter, I came to know about my cervical cancer which had already reached its last stage. Some months prior to my knowledge of my cancer, I used to experience pain whenever we made love but I used to ignore. Iam paying a heavy price for it now. The doctor then told me that I can live maximum for another 1 year or so. I decided not to tell about the illness to anybody. I did not want to become a centre of attraction and subject of pity. You were so engrossed in work that you hardly gave me time and my time was running by. I just needed attention from you and hence I had to write that letter.

Arvind, I did not tell you about this illness, because had I told you about it, you would have loved me, but that love would have been out of pity. I wanted the real love, love you would have given me, if were to live like a normal human being. I know I acted as a selfish woman but I wanted my husband to love me for the remaining time I had. I also did not want to burden you with my problems because I knew, my problems like me was temporary.

The letter which you wrote to me next proposing all your love, was the most beautiful love letter I have ever read. I was touched and moved. Just for your information, I used to read that letter everyday without fail.

I loved the way you used to cook pasta for me, although it tasted horrible, but I could feel your love in that. Just get yourself a good cooking book and you will do fine. I loved the way you used to put your arms around me when I used to feel low. I loved the way when you tried to dance with me on our honeymoon. There are so many things Arvind, that Iam going to miss about you when I reach heaven. How I wish I had some more time.

 


Image uploaded from inimagine.com
Image uploaded from inimagine.com

Your love gave me the power to bear the pain and face the disease. The two weeks that we spent in Paris were the most beautiful days of my life, better than our honeymoon. I cherished each and every moment.

Our life did become mundane after that, but the best part was, you became a far better husband after that letter. Your love gave me strength at every step. As the clock was ticking by, I could not bear the fact in some days I wont be there on this earth. I used to watch you everyday like a teenage girl hoping my life will be extended by some days, so that I could stay with my dream man a little longer. I used to cry like a baby day in day out but the fact that you were around made me strong. Life ditched me when I needed it most.

Arvind, just promise me one thing that after I die, you will open a Marriage counseling centre and help all those couples out there who are in problems. I do not want another Natasha writing letters to her husband. Marriage was the best thing that ever happened to me and I want each and every woman to enjoy this bliss. You also have to promise me that you will get married again. I was just one part of your life. There will be other parts too and you have a long way to go. Your life is waiting for you with open arms. Keep me in your heart and remember me in a way that I could be of help to you. I don’t want my memories should bring pain and tears to you. Tomorrow when you are sad, confused, unsure, despodent and lost complete faith in yourself try and look at yourself through my eyes and you will realize that there is someone up there apart from GOD who still trusts you and has complete faith in you. Let there be love as life is too short. Once you fulfil these promises I will feel satisfied.

I love you Arvind alot and I don’t know when I die, you will be with me or not. I have treasured every moment I have spent with you. Have a great life and may God always keeps showering HIS blessings on you. I wish God grants me some more days to live before the inexorable death comes. I will meet you again sometime somewhere again in next life. Till then good bye.

Your loving wife,

Natasha

P.S. I still love you alot and will always do so.

P.S. I still love you

Image uploaded from photobucket.com
Image uploaded from photobucket.com

There were tears in Jatin’s eyes. “When did you find this letter? Jatin asked. “Two weeks after Natasha died”. Arvind continued “She had kept it hidden in one of her drawers in the cupboard so that I could read it after she was dead. I wish I had found this letter before. I was on my Europe trip when I got the news. For 2 weeks I did not eat or sleep properly. It was painful. I decided to leave my job and set up a Marriage counseling centre. If today Iam successful, its only because of her. I miss her alot guys”. Tears started coming down Arvind’s cheek. “Iam sorry. I just couldnt control” Arvind confessed. “Its Ok man, we understand and we are indebted to you. You have given both of us a new life” Jatin said in a soothing tone. He kept the letter on the table and kissed Pooja. Arvind smiled and said ”I just wish you guys luck for future” “Thanks Arvind” Pooja said.

2 hours passed. Arvind was taking a small nap. Suddenly the door bell rang. He opened the door and saw something on the floor. It was some sort of a letter. He picked it up and started reading.

To be contd..

Copyright © 2009

Comments

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\Brenda Scully  says:
4 months ago

not sure i am actually up to this but read it any way well check up the other's and come back great work

jayb23 profile image

jayb23  says:
4 months ago

Thanks brenda for stopping by. Do read the earlier parts and you will understand the story better.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
4 months ago

See I came here to read the Part 4...would be back to read part 5. You are a great story teller.

Lgali profile image

Lgali  says:
4 months ago

very nice hub thanks

jayb23 profile image

jayb23  says:
4 months ago

Thanks Anamika for stopping by and commenting. Im glad you liked it

Thanks Lgali for stopping by

Aarti  says:
4 months ago

Jay, u actually got my eyes moist after reading Nat's letter..It's like time once lost never comes back..this is a gr8 realisation one shud hv in life always which will keep away most ppl from regretting later on...I hv registerd dis fact in my mind thru ur hub,hope others too do it...Good goin buddy..keep up d gud work

jayb23 profile image

jayb23  says:
4 months ago

Thanks Aarti. I am happy that you were able to realte to this hub and you were so moved by it. Lack of communication is the root cause of so many problems. Iam happy u now understand why communication is so imp.

Nadia  says:
4 months ago

Hey Jay...part 4 really touched me ..it brought tears in my eyes..I really dont know what more to add..

jayb23 profile image

jayb23  says:
4 months ago

Thanks so much Nadia, Iam so glad that u liked it. I understood whatever u wanted to say. Thanks again

AEvans profile image

AEvans  says:
4 months ago

Well I enjoyed that it and it is sad that she had to die from cervical cancer and only wanted him to love her the way she asked him too. :)

Rashi  says:
4 months ago

Good Story Jay... waiting for part 5 :)

jayb23 profile image

jayb23  says:
4 months ago

Thanks rashi for stopping by and commenting

anglnwu profile image

anglnwu  says:
4 months ago

Wow--such sacrificial love! You can't women like that anymore--maybe, not true but her love seems so big. Thanks for sharing.

jayb23 profile image

jayb23  says:
4 months ago

Thanks anglnwu for stopping by and commenting

cristina327 profile image

cristina327  says:
4 months ago

Nice hub, a nice nostalgia. Thank you for sharing it.

jayb23 profile image

jayb23  says:
4 months ago

Thanks Cristina for stopping by and commenting.

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