Persuasion is an act that involves inducing or embracing a point of view. This can be by argument, reason or entreat. But the ultimate outcome is for two people to collaborate on an opinion that is mutually beneficial to each other.

Now manipulation, considered by many, is persuasion. But it is not. Although there is a fine line between manipulation and persuasion, manipulation is based on intent whereas persuasion is based on coming together.

Noted psychologist Angela Dailey explains that manipulation, whether positive or negative, is more clearly defined by the intent of the person who manipulates.

What does this mean?

You tell a child who has a bag of cookies, just before bedtime, knowing their intention is to eat the whole bag of cookies, that they can have only one cookie or no cookies at all and the child chooses to have one cookie. Well, you have created an illusion of choice within the bounds of what you consider acceptable. You have manipulated the child’s behavior, but this is for the good of the child.

On the other hand, there are many instances where manipulation is negative and used to sell products or services out of the context of persuading.

Remember, the difference is intent. And many manipulators use deception. But it doesn’t work in the long run because there has been no trust or relationship developed with the manipulator.

In your small business marketing you must develop your persuasion techniques for a win-win outcome where everyone’s needs are met. Do not turn your persuasion into manipulation.

Robert Greene, author of The 48 Laws of Power (Penguin Putnam – 2001) was much clearer in his definition of manipulation. He said, “all attempts to influence are manipulation.”

In the long run manipulation will lose because manipulators are inwardly focused on their outcome.

The four most important elements that must exist to manipulate or be manipulated are: Seeking a solution, time sensitivity, potential for loss and benevolent authority.

There is a fine line between persuasion and manipulation and it is often hard for people to make that distinction. Believe it or not, most of the same elements of manipulation must be in place to successfully persuade, but again the key difference is intent.

Persuasion is not just about selling though; it is also about gaining agreement and support.

It is about creating a common ground upon which two people or more can come together in thought and belief.

Persuasion occurs in virtually every area of life from what you’ll have for breakfast to who makes it for you every morning. Virtually every aspect of our lives involves persuading someone (even ourselves) to do the things that we want them to do so we can have more of what we want.

The best persuaders are innately curious about the world around them and the people they interact with. They want to know what makes the other guy tick. They are interested in the desires, dreams and goals of the person they are persuading for the purpose of using those as leverage, to be sure, but equally to create a long-term relationship based in mutual respect.

Persuasion is as much about learning what the other person needs on a physical level (product), as well as on an emotional level, and why, as it is about providing the right product or service at the right price. The best product or service at the best price presented poorly and in a way that is incongruent with the buyer’s needs will often be overcome by an inferior product or price presented persuasively.

Typically persuasion has a very positive connotation while manipulation does not.