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Pester Power : Do your children dictate your personal finance state

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By cashmere


Make the money count
Make the money count
Its okay to buy expensive toys for Birthdays
Its okay to buy expensive toys for Birthdays
Involve them with innovative home made toys
Involve them with innovative home made toys
Teach them to handle money and budget well
Teach them to handle money and budget well

Having a child can be the most demanding experience of your life. Physically, mentally and also financially. The physical aspect and the discomfort will usually vanish in a few years, and mentally too you get used to being a parent, but financial demands continue all year long throughout the years.

The trouble is not with the children, who have no idea about the whole situation, but with the parents who fail to educate them. The personality of the child is like wet clay that a parent gets to mould. If you can teach them the importance of finances and budgeting, the financial drain on your is taken care of.

So what aspects do you need to worry about? Here’s a few pertinent situations that do crop up with every one. How do you deal with them?

How to say “No” to your child’s demands

You are in the shop and your kid spots something that he wants. He starts hankering for it and you instantly buy it for him to stop that awful noise. I'm guilty of it myself. This is the worst thing you can do. You need the child to understand that extra buys throw the budget off kilter.

He needs to be told of the list that you are out to shop for and the fact that there's just enough money to cover the list. If he wants something above and beyond, he will have to wait to see if there is any money left after the purchases. Or you could have him do without one of his own items on the list.

Just don't give in because of his creating a tantrum. That sends him the wrong message. It tells him if I just become a pest, my mom or dad will buy me whatever it is that I want. Do you really want that ill behaved child to grow into a monster? Learn to say "No" to your child in a kind way.

How much pocket money is okay

My husband often complains that his mother gave him the same amount of pocket money that she got in school. That it was far less than his needs and he was often embarrassed due to the shortage of funds. One of the main things that you must understand as a parent is that times have changed and money doesn't buy all that it did.

You should ask the parents of your children's friends just how much pocket money they are given. Then give your child money in the same range as long as it does not play havoc with your own budget. In fact it makes sense to stick a little on the lower side with the pocket money, as you are bound to buy them more things in any case.

How often should you buy an expensive toy

As parents we want to give our children the very best of everything, but is it really necessary to buy the most expensive version of every toy on the market? No it is not, and very often the cheaper version will do just fine. Make sure that the toys are not unsafe or dangerous for kids, but other than that don't go overboard.

Experiment with home made toys. I wrote a hub about them as well. They are inexpensive, test your child's creative spirit and can be a great way to spend quality time together. So remember that a special occasion like a birthday may justify one expensive toy, but don't make it a monthly habit that will kill your budget.

Teaching the child the importance of budgeting

I've been talking a lot about having a budget. I do hope you know how to make one! The next step is to teach your child how to make one and follow it. For any child buying is impulsive. So you need to teach them about how you save money to buy something expensive at a later date.

As a child I wanted a pair of skates, and my parents told me to save my monthly pocket money till I had enough to buy them. It was the ten most difficult months of waiting but the final reward was fabulous. I will never forget that feeling. That's how I learnt to be responsible for my own finances. I no longer have the skates, but I still have the lesson.


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Comments

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Hello, hello, profile image

Hello, hello,  says:
3 months ago

Great Hub and great advice.

BrianS profile image

BrianS  says:
3 months ago

It is strange how you can feel guilty for not always providing for your children exactly what they want, but really you should not feel guilty if you have done what you can and that is sensible and practical.

AlexK2009 profile image

AlexK2009  says:
3 months ago

In response to your comment below, perhaps itis the cheildren who learned that the squeaky wheel gets the grease grow up to be the ones who change the world for the better rather than just accepting the rubbish our "betters" throw at us. Perhaps they know that if they complain enough the store HAS to give them the money back for the faulty object, and the management HAVE to listen about the dangerous conditions inthe workplace and the governmment HAS to listen to ALL the people.

Teaching them to understand the problems others face and when and how to throw a tantrum is harder but better for them. This is separate from the question of teaching them about money management

"Just don't give in because of his creating a tantrum. That sends him the wrong message. It tells him if I just become a pest, my mom or dad will buy me whatever it is that I want. Do you really want that ill behaved child to grow into a monster? Learn to say "No" to your child in a kind way."

Candie V profile image

Candie V  says:
3 months ago

"No" is one word I have never had trouble saying. But my son and I had an agreement, that if he could state his needs, without whining or tantrums, I'd look at it again in a few days. He learned how to become a 'salesman' and I learned how to negotiate.

Budgeting is a skill that kids MUST learn. It's been a hard one for me to learn, as well. Thank you Cashmere!

anglnwu profile image

anglnwu  says:
3 months ago

Discerning between needs and wants is the way to go--while we want to teach all the old-fashioned values, times have also changed (as you pointed out), so balance is in place.

Thanks for sharing.

cashmere profile image

cashmere  says:
3 months ago

Brian, sometimes its just difficult to know if you are right or wrong. Its all one big experiment when you are a parent.

Alex, I never looked at it in that light. I guess when you are used to asking for the best you do get more aware of your rights as a customer.

Candie, tell me about it. Negotiating is all I do all day.

Good point Anglnwu. Needs and wants. Its what you need to be able to distinguish between. What used to be a want once has now become a need...eg cell phones. did u read the hubs?

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